Uncanny Christmas Tales – (003) The Girl in The Green Dress

 

Steve Berry had always had a dislike for Christmas, despite all the jollity and faux fun, because unlike many of his Christmas mad friends he had no happy Christmas memories to anesthetise him against the season.

His parents were alcoholics and each year their Christmas came in a bottle and thanks to his father, Steve’s came with a slap.

So, his childhood Christmases were memories he would rather have forgotten, but as he grew up he found that adulthood brought no relief and it always seemed to him that when shit happened at that time of the year, Christmas just magnified the misery.

For example, if someone dies at Christmas the very season makes it more keenly felt.

He could testify to that from personal experience, as his mother died on Christmas Eve when he was only 19.

He has no idea where his father was and quite frankly, he didn’t care, he never showed up for the funeral and he could have been dead as well for all he knew.

So as a result, he has never trusted Christmas, because he knows that horror lurks beneath the coloured lights, tinsel, and paper chains.

That was until Holly Davis opened his eyes to new possibilities and he realised that Christmas could also magnify joy.

However, it wasn’t just Christmases that held horrors in his past, so did New Year’s Eve.

Steve wasn’t big on New Year’s Eve, it was not a time that held any deep significance for him, in fact he found the whole idea of it rather pointless, why did people make such a fuss over going from one year to the next.

That alone would have been reason enough for him to dislike it, far apart from the personal memories it evoked.

It was on one particular New Year’s Eve when he was six years old that his parents locked him in his room while they went off on a three day bender that still haunted his memories, but he had decided to try and put all of that behind him and with Holly’s help he was hopeful that he might.

Since the first day he met her she had helped to tame his demons, which all began when Holly temporarily took over running her Uncle Phil’s pub, the Pig and Whistle, a week and a half before Christmas, Steve had got blind drunk and ended up spending the night in the lounge bar.

When he woke up the next morning, she had a surprise for him.

“Good morning sunshine” Holly called as she crashed through the door wearing a dressing gown and slippers.

“Ow” he said “have some respect for the dead”

She put a mug of black coffee on the table in front of him and peered at his bloodshot eyes

“Blimey! Can you actually see through those?” she asked

“I hope you don’t drink like that when you’re working”

“Well I don’t need to worry about work until January” he said and sipped at his coffee

“Don’t you remember anything about last night?” Holly asked with a wry smile on her lips

He closed his eyes and replied

“I remember I don’t like Christmas”

“Anything else?” Holly persisted

“It was very busy, very noisy” Steve said but could remember nothing else

“Do you remember me saying I needed more staff?” she asked

“Yes, I do remember that” he replied

“Good” she said “because your it”

“What?” he said loudly and then winced

“You volunteered to work right through till New Year’s Eve”

“I can’t have” Steve said

“Well you did” She insisted and showed him a piece of paper detailing the fore mentioned offer signed by Steve.

“That doesn’t count” he said “I was pissed”

“It’s legally binding” Holly stated “It’s notarized by a solicitor”

Steve stared at the signature

“Sam Culver?” he said “he’s not a solicitor he’s a forklift driver”

“Be that as it may, but he has still witnessed your signature on this contract” she said coolly

“Contract?” he said in disbelieve

“Contract” she confirmed

“Oh, please you’re not really going to hold me to this?” Steve said waving the “contract” in her direction

“You start tonight” she informed him

“Oh God I’ve sold my soul to the Christmas fairy” he said with his head in his hands

“I prefer Christmas angel” she said “But I’m not the one with tinsel in my hair”

So that was that she had produced a contract he had signed the night before agreeing to work for her until New Year’s Eve.

However despite his initial misgivings he had thoroughly enjoyed it and he was still uncertain quite how she managed to affect that, but affect it she did and during the ten days working for her she had turned his life upside down and it culminated on Christmas Eve with him wishing her a Merry Christmas at closing time and kissing her.

They were then snowed in at the pub for Christmas day and after exchanging presents they kissed again.

In the week that followed there was good deal more kissing as day by day the headed inexorably towards New Year’s Eve.

But he had a sense of foreboding as his normal dislike for the occasion was magnified this year because it marked the final day of his contract at the Pig and Whistle and could also mark the end of Holly’s Tenure at the pub and maybe even their budding relationship.

Although he didn’t like it, it was a good earner for the pub and as the takings had not been optimised on Christmas Eve due to the snow storm, added to the fact that the figures had been disappointing in the interim as well, it was unarguable that a good New Year’s Eve was vital.

With this in mind, Holly and Steve had been at the Cash and Carry all afternoon stocking up on vital supplies.

“Right that’s the lot Hon” she said

“Are you sure that’s enough?” Steve asked facetiously

“That’s enough lip from you” she said and kissed him.

And that simple kiss, a symbol of their familiarity, was a milestone moment for although they had kissed many times in that week since Christmas Eve they had only ever kissed when they were alone and certainly never in public. 

“If we sell that lot tonight, I’ll be over the moon” she said although there wasn’t any chance that that might actually happen even if they did have an extension until 1.00am.

Steve normally spent New Year’s Eve at home in his flat, watching a DVD and hiding from the world.

But this year was going to be very different.

 

At least on New Year’s Eve there were none of the annoyingly jolly Christmas songs, there was only one annoying New Year’s song and that was usually confined to midnight.

There was a steady trade in the bar, far more than Christmas Eve, but not exactly record-breaking numbers, and most of the supplies they had bought earlier would remain unsold, but just after 9 o’clock the numbers swelled and continued swelling until the place was absolutely banging.

There were seven of them working that night but on six at any one time behind the bar and they were rushed off their feet.

The staff and a hard core of the regulars were in fancy dress,

Debbie was a French maid, Stephanos was in a toga, Clare was a witch, Ausra was a Gypsy, Petra was a clown and Steve was a pirate, while Holly, as was her custom, was dressed immaculately, on this occasion as the Emerald Lady in a wonderful green dress adorned with a garland of holly leaves and around her neck was the holly leaf pendant that Steve gave her for Christmas.

By the end of the night he had to admit that he hadn’t enjoyed a New Year’s Eve more, even though his feet were killing him.

When the last of the punters had been ushered out the door and the bolt shot at 1.25 am, Holly said

“Thank God for that, put the kettle on” and then she kicked off her shoes.

Everyone pulled together and gathered up all the glasses and cleared them to the kitchen and then Steph and Clare brought out the drinks on a tray

“Where are the others?” Holly asked

“They’re loading the glasses into the machine” Clare replied “You know what Steve’s like”

“Tell them not to worry” she said “We’ll do it in the morning”

Holly frowned and then corrected herself

“We’ll do it in later this morning”

So, they all sat together drinking their tea and coffee and laughing at the exploits of one or two of the more enthusiastic punters.

Very soon there was only Holly and Steve left and he asked

“Do you want another tea?”

“I’d rather have a proper drink” she replied “You could join me if you’re staying over”

He nodded and went behind the bar and returned shortly with two glasses of wine.”

As they sat together drinking, she said

“My feet are so sore”

“Put them up here” he said tapping his knee “I’ll rub them for you if you want”

“Oh yes please” she said and put both stocking feet on his knee

“Hold up” he said “one at a time”

“Oh, that’s really lovely” she said as Steve began massaging her little foot, and that was as all he got out of her for the next twenty minutes until he was halfway through her other foot when she said.

“You’re a free man now”

“What do you mean?” Steve asked

“The contract” she said

“It was only up to and including New Year’s Eve it’s now New Year’s Day, so you are free to return to your old life”

“Good” he said sharply, and Holly baulked at the force of the word.

“Because now I am here because I want to be”

And Holly’s face broke into a broad smile and she kissed him

 

They made love for the first time in the early hours of New Year’s Day and as they lay entwined in the semi darkness Holly said.

“We make a good team; we could run this place together”

“What about Phil?” Steve asked

“Ah I may have misled you regarding Uncle Phil” she confessed

“In what way?”

“He’s not coming back” she said

“Why not?” Steve asked

“He’s ill” Holly replied sadly

“How ill?”

“The “he won’t see another Christmas” kind of ill”

“Oh” he responded, “so he’s not on holiday?”

“No” she admitted “I am in the process of buying the pub from him”

“That’s a big step” he said

“I know” she agreed “but I have years of experience in Hospitality and you’re a good accountant”

“So, you only want me for my numeracy” he said

“No, I want you for your foot rubs” Holly corrected him

“Ok then it’s a deal” he said and sealed it with a kiss.

Which was a prelude to them making love again.

But Steve paused briefly and said

“You do realize what would happen if we were to marry?”

“What’s that?” she said pleasantly surprised that his thoughts had already strayed to the question of marriage

“You would become Holly Berry”

“I could live with that” she said and brought the discourse to a passionate conclusion.  

Uncanny Tales – (005) – Chapter 05 – The House Guest with the Spirit of Christmas

 

Two days later the last of the timber was removed revealing the full extent of the damage to the boundary fence, the garden shed and what used to be the lawn, miraculously the wishing well sustained only minor damage.

Paul was on site and talking on his mobile organising the next phase which would be to remove all the debris and replace the fencing, erecting a new shed and generally tidying up.

The new lawn would have to wait until spring and the replacement shrubs and plants would be replaced at the same time.

Julie went out into the garden just as he was finishing his phone call and I was standing by the remains of what used to be the shed, the shed erected by my own two hands, I was amazed it had lasted twenty years, I never did master DIY.

I was too far away to hear what Paul and Julie were saying but they were headed back inside the house, I was already in the kitchen when they arrived.

“We’re cutting Christmas trees on the estate at the moment I will have them cut you one by way of an apology, what size would you like?”

“I don’t really do Christmas” She said “It’s just an empty commercial festival”

“But thanks anyway” She added.

“Oh, and when did you become so cynical?”

“From the moment I discovered Father Christmas doesn’t exist”

“Who says he doesn’t?” he asked

“Ho, ho, ho” she said sarcastically

“I think everybody has a little bit of Christmas in their heart” Said Paul

“That would be tiny in my case” she said, and Paul looked a bit deflated after she said that but perked up when she added.

“A meal would be a perfectly acceptable apology though”

 

It was a week later when Paul picked Julie up and drove her over to Abbotsford for their meal, I would say their date, but Julie kept insisting it was not a date.

It was quite late when he brought her home and I was a little disappointed when the evening ended on the doorstep with a peck on the cheek, I had high hopes, but Julie was holding back for some reason.

“Good night” Julie said and came in and closed the door.

“Nice evening?” I asked

“Yes, very nice”

“Good meal? Good company?”

“Yes, to both questions”

“But?”

“I really like him, but I don’t know if I want to go through it all again”

“Nothing ventured nothing gained” I said

“I’ve done my share of venturing in the past and I haven’t yet gained” Julie said

“I’ll probably just screw it up again Harry so it’s probably best if I stop it before it starts”

She waved away any protest from me and went up to bed.

“Night Harry”

“Night Julie” I replied and to myself I added

“That won’t do at all”

 

The next day before Julie was up and about I sent a text to Paul from Julie’s mobile.

It was quite exciting as I’d never done one before, even while I was alive.

I was quite surprised that it was more difficult than it looked and really rather complicated to get the letter you wanted and then it kept changing the word.

I came very close a number of times to throwing the damn thing across the room, but eventually I managed to write:

“Thank you, Paul, I had a wonderful time last night I really would love to do it again. Julie x

PS, just ignore me if I play hard to get, Lol”

Within a couple of minutes, I got a reply.

“I had a wonderful time too I will call you soon. Paul”

Then I quickly deleted my text to him and his reply and then put the phone back in Julie’s handbag with only minutes to spare before I heard Julie coming down the stairs.

 

I felt very pleased with myself and my subterfuge and I thought it was just a matter of time before the two of them got together again, however when a week had passed, and nothing had happened I was not so confident.

There had been a couple of texts which I didn’t get to see before she deleted them and there had been a phone call, but it didn’t last long, so it was to be another evening of chess and conversation.

I set up the board as Julie entered the room from the kitchen carrying a glass and bottle she opened a bottle of wine the first she’d had for several weeks.

I frowned at her and nodded in the direction of the wine.

“It’s ok I haven’t taken any pain killers for three days, so this is by way of celebration”

“Excellent” I said “I wish I could join you”

“Bad luck” she said taking a long sip

“But I would prefer Christmas Ale” I added

“Oh, don’t start on Christmas again”

“Why do you hate Christmas so much?” I asked

“How long do you have?” She replied without humour.

“I have as long as it takes, I’m dead remember” I said trying to inject a little humour as I sat down opposite her.

“Where should I start” she looked around the room as if seeking inspiration.

“Christmas has been a disappointment all my life, I grew up with the constant disappointment of not getting the presents that I asked for” she said with a wry smile “Which I blamed Santa for”

I started to speak but Julie interrupted me.

“I know that’s very childish and pathetic” she said and even laughed a little.

“When did you stop believing?”

“I believed right up until I was seven, that was the year I discovered Santa Claus was actually my drunken father” She said flatly and took a long drink

“So, with a drunk for a father and a violent bully for a mother my childhood was just full of Christmas joy”

“Not brilliant then” I added

“Then three Christmas’s ago at one of our merry Christmas family gatherings my own sister stole my husband and my mother took my sisters side” she paused thin lipped remembering the pain of it, feeling it fresh as if for the first time, she gathered herself then continued.

“My dear mother said if I’d kept him satisfied in the bedroom he wouldn’t have strayed, not that he had to stray too far with my slutty sister sniffing round him like a bitch on heat”

“What did you say to your mother?” I asked

“I said that if she’d kept my father satisfied in the bedroom he wouldn’t have turned to drink”

“Oooh”

“I haven’t spoken to her or my sister since” she confessed and took another drink.

“Then last year two weeks before Christmas a drunk driver ran a red light and broadsided me shattering my hip and putting me in hospital for months”

She reached out and grabbed her cane.

“And now I still have my trusty stick as a constant reminder of what Christmas means to me”

I wished I could have given her a fatherly hug, but I couldn’t, so we fell silent after that and concentrated on the chess for a while.

 

I was out and about in the garden early next morning it was less than a week before Christmas and I was beginning to despair that as far as we had come together it was not going to be far enough to save us both.

But it was more than that, when I started it was about helping Julie in order to cross over and be reunited with Rose.

But I had come to care about Julie more than I thought possible and furthermore I had come to realise just how much I had wasted the final months of my own life.

I had brought her back from the brink and I resolved that I would succeed in opening her heart, not for my own sake but for hers.

I transported myself to the sitting room only to find it empty but there was the sound of cooking coming from the kitchen and perhaps more alarming the sound of singing.

When I appeared in the kitchen I found Julie frying bacon and singing along to an Eva Cassidy song playing on the radio.

“Are you ok?” I asked with false concern.

“Yes why?”

“I thought you must have had a relapse and your hip was hurting”

“Very funny Harry” she said with a smile.

“Would you like some bacon? Oh, I forgot you can’t eat can you I’ll have to eat it all myself then”

“You can be a very cruel young woman” I said indignantly and tucked the newspaper under my arm and withdrew to the sitting room.

After she had devoured her bacon, which I was denied the pleasure of eating, but perhaps worse even than that  

I was also denied its smell, she came into the sitting room and sat opposite me and we started a tug of war over the newspaper.

“You’re in a very playful mood today” I suggested after I had lost custody of the paper.

“I feel happy today, I don’t know why, I just do”

As she was in a good mood I decided to chance my arm and enquire as to the state of play between her and Paul.

“Have you heard from Paul?” I said directly.

“Don’t start”

“What? It was an innocent enough question”

“Hmm, well as it happens he did phone me”

“Really?” I said keenly

“He invited me out for dinner on Christmas Eve”

“That’s great”

“I declined his invitation” she said

“Why?”

“Look Harry I’m sure he really is a nice guy and I do like him” Julie said

“But?”

“But, I am finally getting my life back on course, and that’s due in no small part to you, and I don’t need any complications”

“That really is a shame” I said sincerely.

“I just don’t think I’m ready” She added

With that she handed me the paper and returned to the kitchen I left it ten minutes or so and then joined her just as Bruce Springfield’s gravelled tones emanated from the radio and I dueted with him in a fine rendition of “Santa Claus is coming to town”.

When we had finished more or less together I took a bow or two.

“Ha-ha I do love a good Christmas song”

“Oh God protect me from the happy Christmas ghost” Julie was laughing.

“What is it with you and Christmas anyway?” she asked rhetorically, then she stood and looked at me, my portly build, white beard and the hateful red sweater, shaking her head despairingly.

“In fact, come to think of it you even look like Santa, in a rather jaded retired to the old folk’s home kind of way” she said and then chuckled her rich velvet chortle.

“Oh, and why is that, just because I’m a jolly fat man with a white beard?”  I said striking an indignant pose.

“No, you have a fair point you would only qualify on two out of three” then her chuckle morphed into a full belly laugh and then I was laughing with her.

Our merriment was interrupted by a knock at the door and Julie was still wiping the tears of laughter from her eyes as she opened the door.

It was a smiling Paul Warwick who had knocked, and his expression instantly changed to one of concern when he saw Julie’s tears.

“Is everything alright?” he asked with genuine concern.

Realizing what she was doing Julie quickly dispelled his concern with a tale about something hilarious on the radio.

Suitably reassured Paul’s smile returned to his face and he briefly gathered himself before revealing the meaning for his visit.

“I know you said you didn’t do Christmas” He began.

“But as I said everyone has a little Christmas in their heart”

Julie was about to cut him off in full flow, but he put his hand up to stop her before she could start.

“So, with that in mind” he said ducking down to retrieve something from the floor.

“I thought of this”

He was holding in his hand a small live Christmas tree in a pot, complete with tinsel and baubles, standing about two feet tall and it was even topped by a fairy.

“A tiny Christmas tree for someone with only a tiny bit of Christmas in her heart” He said as he presented the tree to Julie.

“That’s so sweet” She said “Thank you”

“You can plant it in the garden after Christmas, so it will keep growing and hopefully your love of Christmas will grow with it” he said and there were tears in her eyes again, as she looked at the tiny tree and then Paul excused himself as he had some estate business that he needed to attend to, which I later found out was delivering hampers to the homes of his workers.

Julie stood looking at the little tree with a silly grin on her face as Paul said goodbye and was heading up the path.

“I told you he was a nice man” I said.

“Yes” she said looking at me with tears welling up in her eyes.

“Oh God I can’t let him go I have to talk to him”

“Well run after him then” I suggested

“I can’t run” She said.

“Go and slow him down somehow”

Julie set off walking and I transported myself to the gate just as Paul’s hand reached for the latch.

As he tried to open the gate I held it shut and no matter how much he shook it, the gate wouldn’t move.

Julie was only a few yards away now.

“Paul!” She called, and he turned around to see where Julie was calling from.

“Hi, you appear to have a problem with your gate” He said just as I let go of it and the gate swung open.

“That’s odd” he said.

“I’m glad I caught you” She said wincing a little at the effort of pursuing him.

“About dinner on Christmas Eve, is it too late to change my mind?”

 

On Christmas Eve I sat in the solitude of the cottage for what I hoped would be the last time, hoping that the person I had come to care so much for, would not need me anymore, while at the same time regretting that I would no longer be required to spend the long pleasant evenings in her company.

In the beginning I thought that I was left stranded on earth solely because of the way I withdrew from life, and that my having to help someone escape my fate was my penance, but in fact I came to understand that my predicament was less about a punishment for me but rather more about salvation for Julie and a last chance for her to find happiness.

In truth no matter how, fond I was of her I did not belong there, and though tinged with regret I hoped soon to be moving on.

I became aware of voices outside and thought, was this the moment of a tender kiss goodnight on the door step, but instead the door opened, and Julie stepped into the darkness and my heart dropped and I thought we were back, perhaps not to square one, but we had definitely gone into reverse.

But then the light went on and following Julie was the tall figure of Paul who closed the door behind him.

“Make yourself comfortable while I get us a drink” Julie said before disappearing into the kitchen.

Paul headed in my direction and I had to move quickly before he sat on my lap.

I stood invisible in the corner by the stairs and observed as Julie came out of the kitchen with a bottle of wine and a glass, then she stopped in her tracks and turned on her heels and briefly returned to the kitchen before reappearing with a second glass. She smiled to herself at the force of habit and glanced around the room to see where I was.

Julie set the bottle and glasses on the table then before she could sit Paul stood up and took her hand and pulled her gently towards him and beside the tiny two-foot Christmas Tree he kissed her tenderly and she kissed him back.

At the precise moment she returned his kiss on that Christmas Eve a bright light emanated down the stairs and I knew my moment had come.

I looked up the illuminated staircase and standing at the top was my dear Rose with her hand outstretched towards me.

I turned again to look at the embracing couple, Paul had his back to me and as their lips parted I allowed Julie to see me one last time.

“Good bye Julie it’s time for me to go now, have a happy life” I said and waved.

Then as she stood holding onto Paul her head resting on his shoulder she mouthed the words “Merry Christmas Harry”

I left the young couple and walked up the stairs and took Rose’s hand and we were instantly in another place.

Now I spend most of my time with Rose and all those who went before me, but I still look in on Paul and Julie from time to time, I can do that now I’m a proper spirit, but that is a tale for another time.

Uncanny Tales – (005) – Chapter 04 – The House Guest and the Divine Wind

 Despite my losing the “battle of the bonfire night party” I knew that the war was far from lost and that I had made great progress and what was now more important than anything else was to pick very carefully the battles I chose to fight.

A victory however small was still a victory and therefore was invaluable.

So, during the month I chipped away at the immovable object that was Julie, in small subtle ways and I felt I was making some progress, but as well as I felt I was doing I couldn’t quantify it.

I couldn’t measure my success unless I could get Julie and Paul in the same place at the same time.

I had absolutely no idea how I could manufacture a circumstance that would bring the two of them together and I was left with the feeling that it would take divine intervention to get them together and as it turned out I was right.

 

We were almost at the end of November and Julie had made so much progress she was hardly using the stick in the house even to get upstairs although she still took it with her whenever she went out, but it was extremely unlikely that she would ever be free of it entirely.

She had made progress in other ways as well, she seemed less frightened of the outside world and had started to take a daily newspaper again and one morning a radio appeared in the kitchen.

We had taken to spending every evening together where we spent the time playing chess or cards and we would chat casually on a variety of subjects though I would often try and steer the conversation into areas I wanted to explore as part of my long-term strategy but quite often we would just listen to the radio.

It was during one of these very pleasant evenings, that I came to enjoy greatly, that events took a change of direction.

There had been a ferocious autumn storm battering the cottage all day, the storm was so bad we had to switch the radio off because the reception was so poor, and it was as we were sitting playing chess when there was an almighty rumble and crash outside.

“What the hell was that?” Julie said gripping the arm of the chair until her knuckles went white.

“I’m not sure” I said standing up. “I’ll go and investigate”

“Well, be careful Harry”

“Unless it’s the Ghostbusters I think I’m probably safe” I said giving her a bemused look.

I transported myself outside and for the first time since my death I was not sorry to be dead the weather was just awful with a fearsome storm was blowing the rain horizontally and I was grateful not to have to feel it

It didn’t take long to find the source of the almighty crash, the gale had uprooted an old horse chestnut tree and dumped it into Julie’s garden missing the cottage by a few feet.

I walked the full length of the tree to find the root end and which sprang up out of the darkness about ten feet the other side of the crushed wooden fence that marked the boundary between Julies garden and the land owner responsible for the removal of the fallen tree, Paul Warwick.

I smiled to myself and then looked up to the heavens and nodded in admiration.

When I reappeared in the cottage the room seemed to be empty.

“Is it safe?” Julie asked.

I couldn’t see where the voice was coming from at first then I found Julie hiding behind her armchair wielding her cane like a weapon.

“What are you doing behind there?” I asked incredulously “Of course it’s safe”

Then she came out from her hiding place suddenly feeling rather foolish.

“I was scared” she added meekly.

“Well there’s no need to be” I reassured her

“What was that noise then?” She asked urgently

“The storm has brought a tree down and the good news is, it missed the cottage, but your shed is only good for firewood”

“Is that all? I knew it would be something simple like that” she said, suddenly confident again.

“What should I do now?”

“Well, have a mug of cocoa and go to bed” I said

“No about the tree, I mean”

“There’s nothing much you can do about it tonight, just have a good night’s sleep and phone Paul in the morning”

“Paul?” She asked coyly.

“Yes Paul Warwick, it’s his tree, he’ll arrange everything”

“Oh” she said disinterestedly

“But don’t worry you won’t have to see him he’ll do everything by phone”

“Oh” She said trying to hide her disappointment but failing.

 

The next morning Julie and I went outside to inspect the damage in the daylight, Julie in her dressing gown and wellies and me in my revolting red jumper, though Julie couldn’t get very far due to the tangle of branches, so she went back inside.

When I had finished my inspection, I went back inside myself and found Julie standing in the kitchen, her mobile phone in front of her, tapping the counter with the edge of a business card.

“He won’t bite you know” I offered “Unless you want him to”

I laughed to myself, but she apparently didn’t hear my little joke.

“I said he won’t bite you know”

“What? I’m not worried about talking to him that’s a preposterous suggestion”

“So, what’s the problem?”

“There isn’t a problem, I was just thinking that’s all” she said then she picked up her mobile and keyed in the number.

“Hello, its Julie Molesworth here, is that Mr Warwick?”

“Ok Paul”

All the time she was talking she was fiddling with her hair with her spare hand which amused me greatly.

“I’m fine but I have a bit of a problem I have a rather large tree laying in my garden”

She noticed me watching her, scowled and turned her back to me.

“No, the house is fine”

“Yes”

“No”

“Oh yes that would be fine”

“Ok thank you, bye”

She switched off the phone and put it down.

“Well that sounded quite amicable, not scary at all” I said.

“I wasn’t scared to talk to him” she retorted.

“So, what was the outcome?”

“He’s coming around this morning” She said matter of factly “in about an hour”

“Excellent” I said, “That is good news”

Julie nodded her agreement.

“And I think he’s just going to love your outfit” I said, and she gave me a puzzled look, then glanced at her dressing gown and muddy wellies, and looked back at me again though the puzzled expression had been replaced by panic.

“Oh God” She exclaimed then kicked off left boot, so it flew across the kitchen, a technique she was unable to employ with the other boot due to the bad leg.

So, she sat down and lifted her foot off the floor and shouted.

“BOOT! QUICK!”

“Alright calm down” I said as I removed her boot.

“Yes calm” she took a deep breath “Calm is good”

Then she jumped up and rushed out of the kitchen, she was still unable to run despite the progress she had made but she covered the ground quite swiftly anyway.

 

She reappeared forty-five minutes later looking much more presentable in a smart skirt and blouse and I noticed she was wearing makeup.

“Is that better?” she asked.

“Very smart but you really didn’t need to go to all that trouble for me”

“I didn’t” she replied shortly.

“I did it for….” She tailed off

“For Paul Warwick? Is that what you were going to say? Why on earth would you care what he thinks?”

“Shut up” she said and tried to punch my arm playfully but not for the first time her hand went right through me and she nearly fell over.

“That’s really annoying Harry” She said when she had straightened herself up “I hate it when that happens”

 

A little over ten minutes later Paul Warwick’s Landrover pulled up in the lane outside the cottage.

Julie was looking out the window as he got out of the vehicle and opened the gate but instead of coming to the front door he went straight to the site of the damage and out of her line of sight, so she went into the other room which afforded her a better look and she watched on as he clambered up onto the fallen tree and then he disappeared down the other side.

“I don’t think he’s going to come in” she said still trying to catch sight of him amongst the branches.

“Oh, he’ll be in when he’s done” I said

It was obvious, if only to me, that he hadn’t rushed round to the cottage on a job he could quite easily have delegated only to go off again without fulfilling the real purpose for his visit which was clearly to see Julie.

Julie spent the next five minutes craning her next to get a better view then she moved away from the window and headed back to the kitchen just in time to see him heading back up the path to the gate.

“He’s off now” She said unable to hide her disappointment.

“What?”

She went back into the sitting room and sat down in her chair and I just didn’t know what to say I couldn’t believe I’d got it so wrong I would have put money on it.

I sat down in the chair opposite her and tried to think of something clever to say.

“Well it’s probably for the best, it was bound to end in tears”

“That’s not helping” she said flatly, and I was just about to say something full of wisdom in response when there was a knock at the door.

Julie opened the door to find a rather dishevelled Paul Warwick the other side of it.

After a brief exchange of polite greetings Julie invited Paul into the kitchen with the promise of coffee and then she turned to look in my direction and mouthed “Not you”

So, I sat alone in the sitting room for the next twenty minutes trying to decipher words from the low rumble of conversation interspersed with small bursts of girlish laughter.

I had just come to the conclusion, that as I was a ghost I could have been in the room with them all along and she would never have known, when the kitchen door opened, and Paul walked through.

“So, the guys will be here first thing tomorrow” He said as he opened the front door.

“And I will see you later in the week”

“Ok thanks Paul, bye” Julie said then closed the door.

“Well?” I said

“Like you weren’t in the room eavesdropping all the time” She implied

“No, I was not” I said suitably indignant even though I would have been if I’d thought about it sooner.

“Oh, sorry Harry” she said and went on to fill me in on the bones of the conversation doubtless leaving out any of the flirtyness.

Paul was sending a crew round to cut and clear the timber which due to the size of the tree would take two or three days.

Then he would return and assess the rest of the damage to the garden, something else that could easily be delegated I thought.

 

The next day was the 1^st of December and the men were hard at work cutting up the fallen tree and I thought to myself as Julie came down the stairs that she looked like a different person, her body had been getting stronger day by day for weeks but now there appeared to be a new spark within her, a new hope.

I just hoped I was right about her and Paul, because I feared if that spark were to be extinguished again it would never relight.

I had just returned to my reading when she said, “Hi Harry they’re a bit noisy aren’t they?”

“Harry!” she repeated then she shouted

“HARRY?”

When I didn’t answer she picked up her cane and poked the book I was reading.

“Oh hello” I said.

“I’ve been talking to you, are you deaf?”

“Not exactly I turned the sound off, so I didn’t have to listen to the racket outside”

“You can do that?” she asked, and I nodded.

“Cool” She said “Unfortunately I can’t do that so I’m going shopping for the day”

“Great don’t forget the decorations”

“Decorations for what?”

“Christmas” I said “It’s the 1^st of December the advent calendars go up today”

“No, no, no” She said firmly “I don’t do Christmas”

“Why not?” I said shocked

“I don’t like Christmas” she replied

“Why don’t you like Christmas?”

“Well let me see, it’s a waste of money for one thing”

“And?”     

“The whole thing is just a sham, people don’t even believe in what they’re celebrating and if you believe what the papers say half the country don’t even believe Christ existed” She stated angrily though at the time I was unsure quite what she was angry about, whether it was the season itself or peoples’ ignorance.

“Well that’s just nonsense we know from the Romans that Christ existed, they were great record keepers the Romans, people might argue that he isn’t the son of God or that God himself doesn’t exist but they can’t deny Christ’s existence” I said but I don’t think she was really listening, it would not be the first time I’d lost the attention of the person I was conversing with, boring conversation was a bad habit of mine throughout my life and apparently after my death as well.

“And what do you believe?” She asked more calmly.

“I believe in the whole nine yards, Father, Son and Holy Ghost” I said trying to lighten the mood without success.

“What about you?”

“I must believe in him because I hate him so much” she retorted and with that she slipped on her coat and picked up her bag.

“I’ll see you later” she said and left.

I knew from the start of this exercise that she had some serious issues in her life but what I didn’t know was that Christmas was one of them, if in fact it was.

Perhaps her dislike of Christmas was actually masking something deeper, only time would tell unless I were to push the right buttons.

Uncanny Tales – (005) – Chapter 03 – The House Guest and the Wise Counsel

 I was trapped in the cottage and its environs, I was earth bound because I shut myself away to wallow in self-pity after the death of my wife Rose.

So, I had come to the conclusion that I must help another person in order to “move on” and re-join my Rose.

It would have been easier if I had done it while I was still alive I could have gone off and sought out someone to help, but as I was dead I had to wait for someone to come to me.

But then if I had lived out my last months in the world in the same way as I lived the rest of my life I wouldn’t have been in the mess I was in.

Or maybe this was how it was meant to be, it was my destiny to help someone, which is where Julie came in, she had come to the cottage to escape the world.

At that moment I didn’t know why, and I would need to know that before I could help her, and I was determined to help her whether she liked it or not.

But to find out what I needed to know I needed to be on good terms with her, which was not helped by my clumsy handling of the situation.

So, it was with some trepidation, after our angry exchange, that I went into the sitting room later in the day.

I feared she might take out the anger she felt towards me and channel it at the innocent revellers.

To be on the safe side I remained invisible until I had assessed the lay of the land, I half expect to see Julie sitting in a rocking chair swigging from a whisky bottle and catapulting sweets at the trick or treaters heads, but she was humming, I hadn’t witnessed her humming before, she did impatient tapping of her fingers, she did grinding her teeth, but I had never witnessed humming.

Despite the fact that the humming was a little unnerving, I took a gamble that it was safe, so I materialized.

“You’re humming” I said, and she jumped, I had startled her, and she was clearly flustered, then her face went scarlet.

“No, I’m not” she said indignantly.

“You were humming, I heard you”

“What you heard was me clearing my throat” Julie said without conviction, so she changed the subject.

“Anyway, where have you been, have you been keeping out of my way?”

“I thought it advisable” I said.

Before she had chance to comment she was alerted to approach of trick or treaters coming down the long winding path.

At this time of the day Julie would normally have to employ her stick to move with any kind of speed around the house but I noticed it was leant discretely against the wall behind the door out of sight of anyone who might be standing on the step if the door was open.

She pulled the curtain back a couple of inches and peered out.

“They’re coming, what do I do?” she asked urgently

“Well” I began.

“Oh, come on, you got me into this mess”

“Calm down you’ll have a stroke” I said

Julie took a deep breath and waited for me to speak.

“All the children will have a bag for their sweets” I told her.

“Yes, yes” she said impatiently.

“Well you put a small handful of sweets into each bag but don’t be too generous to early or you won’t have enough to go around everyone”

“Ok” she said and nodded.

“But first you have to open the door” I said inclining my head towards the closed door.

“Oh God yes” she said and laughed nervously “that would help”

Julie opened the door and was met with a chorus of “TRICK OR TREAT” from a small group of excited witches, warlocks, ghosts and ghouls.

“Wow look at you all” she said “What brilliant costumes”

“Ok who’s first?” she asked as she picked up one of the sweet tubs and scooped up a handful.

At the back of the group keeping order was a tall dark-haired man, wearing a flat cap and leather jacket, Julie caught his eye briefly and smiled and he smiled back, then carried on with the sweets, but she kept glancing in his direction, and she estimated he was in his thirties.

Soon she had deposited a handful of sweets into every bag and the group moved back up the path.

“Goodbye Miss Molesworth” the tall man said and smiled, and she smiled back and then looked self-consciously in my direction.

Despite herself she was still smiling as she shut the door.

“You didn’t smile at the children did you” I asked

“You’ll scar them for life”

“Oh! and which poor child was it that you made cry” she retorted

“Or was it someone else you were smiling at?” I said, and Julie blushed deeply just as the doorbell rang.

“Saved by the bell” I said

Julie opened the door and repeated the exercise, and then another three times until the sweet tubs were empty and all the village children had had their share, then she closed the door and reached for her cane.

“I’m exhausted”

“You enjoyed it though?”

She gave me a stern sideways glance and I could see pain in her features.

“Ask me later after I’ve had a drink” she said and then with a bottle of wine and a glass she hobbled towards her armchair.

“Will you join me?” She asked smiling “Oh I forgot you can’t”

“Oh, that’s cruel”

After her first glass of wine she began to relax and after the second she had lowered her guard.

“You had a good time, didn’t you?” I ventured.

“Ok yes I enjoyed, it though I’ll deny it tomorrow”   

“And the smile?”

“I admit he was very handsome, for a yokel”

“His name is Paul Warwick and he’s not so much a yokel more a country squire”

“Really” She said with disinterest

“So, which of the little darlings were his children?”

“None of them” I answered “He’s not married”

“Oh!” she exclaimed then replaced it with a rather muted “oh”

After another glass I thought it was safe to raise the subject of this afternoon’s exchange of views.

“Am I forgiven?” I asked.

“What for?” She slurred

It became apparent I had left it one glass too late for a sensible conversation, I had forgotten to take into account that she hadn’t eaten since lunch.

“This afternoon”

“Of course, you spoke very wisdomous words”

“Wisdomous?”

“Yes, you are very wisdomly” she said as she leant forward to raise her glass to me and slopped half of it on the table

“I think you mean wise”

“Well I was close” she almost said slopping more wine this time down her blouse.

“Time to get you to bed I think”

“You cheeky old ghost you” She said trying to get out of the chair.

Once she managed to get vertical her bad leg gave way and I had to catch her before she hit the floor.

It was a good job I had been practising otherwise I would never have been able to help her, it would have appeared as a very comical scene as I had a firm hold on Julie yet when she tried to hold onto me her hands kept going through me.

“You’re a difficult man to get to grips with Harry” she remarked with a puzzled expression on her face.

“Well you concentrate on staying upright and I will propel you upstairs to bed”

“Ok”

So, with her tongue sticking out the side of her mouth and one eye closed tight shut she managed to adopt a stance which kept her more or less upright.

I then gave her instructions “Left, Right, Left, Right” until we had made the journey up to her room then I guided her onto her bed.

“I hope you’re going to behave like a gentleman” she said and smiled, still with one eye shut tight.

“You’re quite safe, I’m dead remember” I replied as I covered her.

“That’s the story of my life” She said

“What is?”

“Trying to raise the dead in the bedroom” this caused her to explode with a laugh so dirty it wouldn’t have been out of place in a Carry On film, she was still chuckling when I turned out the light.

“Good night Julie”

“Night Harry”

 

The next morning, I was sat in the kitchen reading the local newspaper, when she walked in, surprisingly bright though she was walking quite stiffly, and she was a little shamefaced.

“Good morning Julie and how are we this morning?”

“I’m fine” she said shortly then she added.

“Was I very embarrassing last night?”

“Not very” I replied.

“Oh God, I was embarrassing though?”

“You were very funny it was nice to see you happy”

“Thanks to you” She said quietly.

“I beg your pardon?” I said and looked up from the paper quite shocked, but she was already on her way out the door for her physio appointment.

 

It was late afternoon when she returned, and she was moving only a little more stiffly than she had been when she left that morning.

“Didn’t you go to physio?” I asked

“Yes, I did, and it was the best session I’ve had” She replied “I think I’m turning the corner at last”

“Excellent”

“Good news and bad news from the doctor though”

“Oh?”

“The good news is he’s changed my medication which is stronger, but I only need to take them as and when needed”

“And the bad news?”

“Strictly no alcohol with these ones” She said holding up an innocuous looking brown bottle.

“A small price to pay though” I said encouragingly

“That’s easily said by someone who can’t hold their drink” she said then laughed like a drain, but her mirth was interrupted by a knock at the door.

“Quick hide” She said

“Ok” I said jumping up.

“Wait a minute I don’t have to hide I’m a ghost, I’m invisible”

Julie looked at me and put one finger up to her lips indicating I should shut up even though she was the only one who could hear me, then she opened the door.

When the door opened it revealed a very wet Paul Warwick.

“Oh, look it’s the yokel” I said

“Hello Miss Molesworth” the yokel said

“Please call me Julie and do come in out of the rain”

“Thank you”

He stepped in and Julie closed the door.

“He’s dripping on your carpet”

“I hope I’m not disturbing you” Paul said.

“No not at all” She replied

“Good, it’s just I thought I could hear voices before”

“That was probably the radio” She lied

“Good” he said unconvinced.

“Quick change the subject” I suggested.

“Can I offer you a hot drink?”

“No thank you I can’t stop I’m afraid, I just called to see if you were aware of the November 5^th bonfire party?”

“No, I wasn’t” Julie answered

“Well we run a coach from the church hall over to Little Trotwood every year, they have an organised display, would you be interested?”

“That’s very kind of you but…”

“Go on say yes” I urged

“…my leg isn’t really up to it…”

“Liar”

“…. It’s not good in the damp weather”

“That’s a shame” Paul said sincerely “It’s always a very good display and they have the best hog roast in the county”

“Thank you anyway” Julie added

“If you change your mind just give me a call” He said reaching into his coat and bringing out a card which he handed to her.

“I will”

She opened the door again and Paul stepped out into the rain again.

“No problem, bye”

“Good bye and thanks again” Julie said closing the door.

“Coward” I said after she had shut the door.

“I don’t like fireworks that’s all” she said pulling a face.

“Coward”

“I’m not a coward” She replied indignantly.

“What else do you call it? He’s attracted to you and you to him”

“Nonsense” Julie said clearly flustered

“And even if there were any attraction I don’t need anyone in my life”

“Everyone needs someone” I said

“Rubbish, in the end people always let you down”

“You can’t tar everyone with the same brush” I said

“I don’t need anyone Harry, I’m perfectly happy on my own”

“Paul’s a good man” I pointed out

“It doesn’t matter how they start out in the end they always let you down, trust me”

I started to speak but she interrupted

“Harry let’s just agree to disagree, shall we?”

I knew I was fighting a losing battle so meekly I said “Ok”

“Good now I’m off to have a bath”