Monday 30 November 2020

The Clerembeax Palace Hotel and Spa – Twitcher

The beautiful Downshire village of Clerembeax St Giles was situated to the west of Abbeyvale located between Grace Hill and Bushy Down and on the outskirts was the Clerembeax Palace Hotel and Spa where many of the villagers found employment, and among them was

Kevin Roche, who was sitting in his car in a carpark up on the edge of the Downshire Downs when he saw Sharon Whitbread approaching furtively, with her coat collar up and the brim of her hat pulled down, and he smiled as it was unlikely that anyone would notice her given how foggy the day was.

When she reached the car, she opened the passenger door and got in and they kissed, and the moment their lips met he wanted her, and he could tell by the urgency of her contribution to the embrace they she wanted him too.

The problem was where, she wasn’t the type of girl to do it in the car, they couldn’t go to hers as her husband was at home as he worked nights, and he couldn’t take her back to his as his wife was asleep in the marital bed having been struck down with the flu, and they certainly couldn’t do it al fresco given the weather, but they really wanted to do it.

“Eureka!” he thought “I have an idea”

He disengaged his mouth from Sharon’s kissed her forehead and said “Come with me”

“Where are we going?” She asked suspiciously

“We’re going birdwatching” he replied as he got out the car.

There was a hide about a hundred yards from the carpark which he knew would be unattended because of the fog, because if you can’t see them no one is going to watch them.

 

When they returned to the car park they kissed again but with slightly less urgency than before.

“I liked birdwatching” she said and smiled

“Me too” he agreed and then he walked her all the way safely to the door of her car, then after watching her drive away he returned home and after quickly showering away his lust, he made a cup of tea and went to check on his wife.

 

Uncanny Tales – (004) – Chapter 03 – The Snow Angels – The Angels of Angels Farm

On Christmas Eve morning we woke up late, well late for us anyway, it was 9.30am when we stirred, and it was so quiet.

Angela snuggled up to me and I held her close.

“What time is it?” She asked sleepily

“Half past nine”

“Wow that’s late we’d better get on”

“It’s not that late” I said nuzzling her neck

“It’s too late for that” she said pushing me away.

“Go and put the kettle on”

“Ok” I said and got out of bed.

Angela got out the other side pulled on a T-shirt and went to the window.

I looked at her and wished we had stayed in bed, then she drew back the curtain.

“Snow!” she exclaimed and then Tigger was back bouncing all over the room squealing “Snow, every time she left the floor.

I walked to the window and looked out on the scene, it had snowed heavily in the night and snow was still falling though more softly and everything was coated in five or six inches of snow.

“It just gets better and better” I mused

“Ok” I said as I turned from the window “What’s it to be, coffee in bed or play in the snow?”

“Play in the snow” Angel shouted and bounded across the room and launched herself at me wrapping her arms round my neck and knocking me backwards onto the bed.

She kissed me passionately on the mouth and asked

“Is there a third choice?”

So, after we made love, we got dressed in our play clothes and wrapped up against the cold and went out to play in the freshly fallen snow.

 

It was like being children again as we rushed around throwing snowballs and wrestling in the snow. 

Where our newly turfed lawn used to be was a vast area of virgin white and we took turns making snow angels and then we built a snowman in the yard until we started to feel cold and wet and our bodies told us to act our age.

So, we went inside and had hot showers and for lunch we had piping hot soup in front of a roaring fire.

After lunch Angela was pottering about in the kitchen washing up and such like and I dozed off in front of the fire.

I started to dream and in the dream I was woken by an icy blast of air from the patio door as it slid open and then a figure stepped through the door it was white and translucent and its outline was made of snow, it was one of the snow angels we had made on the lawn.

It walked towards me then stopped as it became aware of the heat from the fire, then it looked directly at me and spoke.

“You must help them, they need you”

“Who? Who must I help?”

“You must help your friends” then the snow angel turned and left the way it came.

Which was when I woke up.

“Well that wasn’t weird at all” I said out loud and gave a nervous laugh.

I stood up and walked towards the kitchen so I could tell Angela and then I felt something beneath my feet, I looked down and there was a patch of melted snow on the carpet.

“That’s odd” I said to myself.

It was odd as we hadn’t come into that room with our snowy shoes and it was the exact spot were the snow angel had been standing in my dream.

I moved again and as I reached the kitchen door; I could see Angela standing motionless staring out of the window open mouthed.

I entered the room and walked up behind her and followed her gaze and on our snow-covered lawn were a dozen snow angels all pointing in the same direction.

Then in an instant they were gone, and Angela turned around and buried her face in my chest.

“Tell me you saw them as well; tell me I’m not going mad”

“I saw them too” I said reassuringly, then I proceeded to tell her about my dream.

But we didn’t really understand what they were trying to tell us. Who were we supposed to help? And what were the angels pointing at?

They seemed to be pointing at what used to be the old outbuildings which were now a house, but why, we couldn’t fathom.

The only friends we had in common were Dave and Emma, so it had to be them.

I phoned the landline and got the “out of service” tone.

Angela phoned Emma’s mobile - no answer so I phoned Dave’s and I got no answer as well.

“Well that settles it” I said

Angela agreed and if it wasn’t them who needed our help it would be great to see them anyway.

But just in case we were both completely barking mad we loaded their presents in the car.

As we drove past the snowman in the yard, I was sure it had moved, it was now facing the opposite way and its stick arm was pointing at the empty house.

I turned to look at Emma she was looking at the snowman as well

“It’s moved hasn’t it? And look where it’s pointing” she said.

 

As we drove up the road to their house it was obvious something wasn’t quite right.

To begin with there were no Christmas lights, and then there was virtually no light in the house just a dull kind of flickering glow.

 

We parked the car quickly and hurried up the path and knocked on the door.

It took a while but then the door opened a few inches and a gaunt pale face peered through the crack with frightened tired eyes.

“Emma?” we both said at once, then the door swung open and Emma broke down and fell against me.

I scooped her up and carried her through to the lounge Angela followed me in and quickly shut the door to keep out the cold.

Once in the lounge we realized it was little warmer than the street.

There was a paraffin heater in the middle of the room and the only light came from candles.

I set Emma down on the sofa and she wrapped herself in the duvet that was laying there, two of the children were sitting on another sofa beneath another duvet reading books the youngest was asleep next to Emma..

Emma was a mere shadow of the confident self-assured woman I had last seen in August.

“What happened?” I asked and it all poured out of her.

She told us that Dave lost his job in September when they started a phased closure of the hospital and try as he might, he couldn’t find anything else.

“At first I got a part time job, cash in hand you know, which helped a bit but then I fell off my bike and broke my arm and I couldn’t work”

“Why didn’t you call us?” Angela asked

“Dave wouldn’t let me” she sobbed

“What about Karen? Wouldn’t she help” I added,

“We had another falling out, we haven’t spoken since Easter”

Karen was her sister, they had never been close, but Emma had resolved to know her better.

“What about when we phoned you? Why didn’t you tell us then?”

“Dave was so ashamed that he couldn’t look after his family, he didn’t want anyone to know”

Emma went on to say that after that the bills just kept mounting up and then the phone was cut off, then the mobiles had to go, and the electric was likely to be next.

“You should have called us then?” I said

“When it got so bad, I didn’t know what to say”

I looked at Angela and I could tell we were sharing the same thought.

We had been so wrapped up in the farm we had forgotten our friends.

Emma continued.

“We owe three months’ rent, what will we do when the council evicts us?”

“It won’t come to that” I said, and I looked again at Angela and she nodded agreement

In that moment, the meaning of the angel’s message had become clear.

“No, it won’t” Angela agreed

“Where is Dave now?” I asked

“He’s upstairs in bed” Emma sobbed heavily “he’s very ill but he won’t let me call a doctor, he hasn’t eaten for two days”

“Well he’s not going to get better if he stays here” I said “You can all come to stay with us for Christmas; we’ve got plenty of room”

I suddenly thought I may have overstepped the mark, so I looked across at Angela, and she nodded her approval and smiled.

“Then after the holidays when the other house is finished, you can move in there until you’re all well and back on your feet” Angela added, and it was my turn to nod approval.

That was what the angels meant I was sure of it.

Emma leapt off the sofa and hugged us both.

“We can sort things out with the council after Christmas so don’t worry” I assured her

“Now you go and pack some clothes and toys for the children” Angela ordered wiping away her own tears.

The logistics took a little thinking about it was obvious we couldn’t all get in our car and I was going to need help with Dave so I phoned Greg, he was coming to us for Christmas anyway, and between the two of us we transported everyone plus baggage and Molly’s cot.

 

Back at Angels Farm, Angela got everyone settled while Greg and I unloaded the cars.

As we took the last bags out of his boot I said.

“You do realize I’ve given your bed away to someone else?”

“No, you’ve given it to someone who needs it more” He replied

“I’ll be all right I’ll sleep in the caravan”

Once we were all inside in the warm, Greg played with the children in front of the fire, Angela prepared some hot food, and I called a doctor for Dave.

 

After everyone was settled in bed Angela and I were clearing up when we looked out the window and noticed it was snowing again, so I opened the kitchen door and stepped down onto the patio Angela stood on the step behind me and wrapped her arms round my neck and kissed my cheek.

“It’s going to be a white Christmas” she whispered in my ear.

Suddenly the floodlight came on and illuminated the whole patio and stood at the edge of the lawn was a Snow Angel with a gentle smile on its face.

“Did we do the right thing?” I asked it

The Angel nodded.

“And the house is for people who need help?”

The Angel nodded again.

“We will use it well” Angela added and with that the angel smiled again and then lay down upon the lawn and then the light flicked off.

The snow was falling fast now.

“All trace of them will be gone by morning” I said

“There will always be angels at the farm” Angela replied and kissed my cheek again, then we went back inside.

 

So, for Angela and me it had been an amazing year, a life changing year, a year never to be forgotten, a year that began with love at first sight and ended with a miracle.

At first, we chastened ourselves for being such poor friends, by being so self-absorbed in our own priorities that we forgot what was important.

But when we looked back over that eventful year, we realized that we were merely adhering to a greater plan

Throughout the year we were being guided and steered towards our destiny by the angels.

They steered us towards St Lucy’s church in Brookley for our wedding and it was no coincidence that the farm went on the market the very day we began our search for a home.

Nor was it happenstance that a breakdown led me to take a diversion that took me past the farm so I would see the “for sale” sign and all those workmen being available just at the time we needed them.

Then finally in an area of the country that had not seen a significant fall of December snow for more than 50 years produces the snowfall on Christmas Eve in which we made the snow angels.

Though some might say we had been manipulated we chose to think we had been chosen and guided and we were happy to be so.

For the rest of our lifetimes we never saw the snow angels again but for all our days we were the angels of Angel’s Farm.

 

Uncanny Tales – (004) – Chapter 02 – The Snow Angels – Finding Angels Farm

The next day was one of reflection and I was left with a feeling of what might have been had I not dropped the ball.

How ironic it was that after all the young women Dave and Emma had put in my path over the years in the hope of finding me a wife, which I always managed to side step, I finally met a woman whom I didn’t want to swerve to avoid and the fates conspired against me.

I finally met a girl who was attractive, funny, intelligent, well spoken, had a sense of humour and good table manners (which was a definite plus) and who left me tongue tied like a lovesick schoolboy, someone who ticked all the boxes and quite simply bowled me over, and I blew it in the most humiliating manner.

It seemed like we had a number of things in common, we were both Christians, we both liked film and cinema, walking in the country to name but three and I was looking forward to finding out more about her and if there were any other boxes I could tick.

I couldn’t believe what a gibbering idiot I had been, I had been complimented in the past, more than once for my eloquence at such occasions and I had never been tongue tied before, well not since I was fifteen, and why oh why did I call her Angel and why did Dave have to blurt out my Christian name.

I didn’t even bother asking her out or getting her number there didn’t seem much point.

I did feel though that we had made a connection and that my overtures, for want of a better term, would not have been rejected out of hand.

I could still have gotten her number from Emma but how would I ever have been able to ask her out after she knew that my name was Gabriel?

So I resigned myself to the fact that due to some circumstances beyond my control and my total inability to string even the simplest of semi coherent sentences together she would be forever viewed as the one that got away.

So, I turned my full attentions to work and started getting things ready for my return to harness the next day.

As I was ironing myself a shirt the phone rang, I ignored it, it was probably one of my mates, who having heard the revelation about my name were just phoning to take the piss.

It rang again, I ignored it again, I knew it wouldn’t take long for Colin to spread the word.

It rang a third time.

“I suppose I’d better get it over with” I said and headed towards the phone.

It rang again before I got to it and the answer phone kicked in, my first reaction was good now leave your poisonous message and then I can delete it without even hearing it, but curiosity got the better of me so I decided to listen to the message and braced myself.

“Hi, oh dear I hope you don’t mind me ringing” Said a faltering voice “Erm, I got your number from Emma”

There was a pause then a nervous laugh.

“It’s Angel”

I quickly grabbed the phone and almost shouted “Hello”

 

If I had gone with my first instinct and deleted the message unheard she would never have called again I would still have thought of her as the one that got away and the remarkable year would simply not have happened.

Well thankfully I did and what a remarkably good decision it was.

The conversation began in a rather stumbling and embarrassed fashion, with lots of nervous laughter and hesitation but ended in a date.

It was decided that a meal would be best where we could relax and find out more about each other.

But where proved more difficult, we ruled out restaurants that used unusual eating utensils which excluded most oriental places and any French establishments serving escargot, the food had to be cooked which eliminated sushi, any food which the eater might end up wearing i.e. spaghetti, ribs etc. so we reached the conclusion that beer and pizza was probably the safest option.

The phone call lasted more than an hour and I was reluctant to end it, but my bladder had the last word.

As it turned out this one carefully selected date proved to be the last difficult decision we had to make together.

The first date led to another and then another and another, we dined at all the establishments we excluded for our first date and ate all the foods previously mentioned.

Between New Years and Easter we were rarely apart and we did everything together, bowling, swimming, walking, you name it we did it and we could neither remember the time before we met nor craved time to ourselves.

We were obviously regular guests at the Parkers where Emma would gloat shamelessly at her matchmaking success.

 

In April I had to go to the States on business unexpectedly for two weeks and Angela wasn’t able to get any time off at such short notice so I went alone and although we spoke on the phone and emailed every day I missed her terribly.

When I returned to home on the last day of April, she was waiting for me as I came through the gate and she ran to meet me and I took her in my arms,

“I missed you so much” Angela said

“I never want us to be apart again, Angel” I replied, then I knelt in front of her and proposed to her right there at the arrivals gate. 

 

We were married in June at St Lucy’s Church in the village of Brookley, the rambling village was 15 miles inland from Sharpington-By-Sea, equidistant between the seaside resort and Pepperstock Green, and was where she used to spend the holidays when she was little, at the home of her maiden Great Aunt, Angela had often dreamed of marrying at St Lucy’s,

We were lucky to be able to book at such short notice, clearly the angels were looking out for us.

We particularly wanted to be married in church as we were both Christians, though we weren’t regular attendees at a particular Church, though we did become so at St Lucy’s.

Because her Great Aunt had passed away and there was no other connection to the village, we had to get a special license.

 

Dave was my best man and Emma was matron of honour and their boys, Jake and Kenny were page boys.

It was a small affair just close friends and what family we had, my brother Greg and Angela’s parents, mine were both gone years before.

But it was a wonderful day, one that we would never forget, then to follow that perfect day came an ambition fulfilled and a dream come true, for both of us when we honeymooned in Italy travelling to Venice on the Orient Express.

After the honeymoon we moved into my flat, a short term arrangement while we found a house, Angela never did find a place of her own, and had been living at her parents up until the wedding, where most of her stuff remained.

 

There was an old run-down farm with a derelict farmhouse that we often walked past on one of our many country walks and we had often wondered what it would be like to live there.

It was beautifully situated in a nice plot of land far enough into the country to be peaceful and close enough to the village to be part of a community, then one day I noticed it was up for sale, it was lucky really because I only drove past it because a bus had broken down on my usual route to work so I went cross country.

I called the agent, it had been empty for about ten years, when the owner, an elderly widow, moved into a home and with no next of kin to keep an eye on the property it fell into disuse.

Now upon the death of the old lady the farm was to be sold to settle her estate.

I arranged an appointment, but I kept it secret from Angela and I just told her we had a viewing.

“So where are we going first?” Angel asked as we were about to leave.

“It’s over Brookley way” I said vaguely

She was sat in the car flicking through a pile of A4 sheets containing estate agent’s blurb.

“Where are the details then?” She quizzed “I can’t find it”

“I must have left it at work, but don’t worry the agent will have a copy”

We had quite a few places to look at some Angela had chosen and some of mine, but the old farmhouse was first on the list.

As we drove down the lane towards the farm Angela asked.

“Where are we going?”

“It’s not far now it’s just down here I think”

And then we turned the corner, and the entrance was on the left.

On the right-hand side of the entrance there was a half rotten five bar gate leaning askew against a crumbling brick wall held in place by a solitary well rusted hinge and tied to the gate.

While on the left-hand side was a once sturdy signpost leaning at a precarious angle adorned by a board bearing the name of the farm, but it could not be read from that angle.

As I drove through the entrance into the yard Angela said

“It’s our farmhouse”

There was already a car in the yard which was unnecessarily flash and could only belong to an estate agent.

The door opened and a preening peacock of a man climbed out pausing briefly to brush away an invisible speck of dust off his sleeve.

I opened my door first to get out but by the time I climbed out Angela was already out fidgeting and transferring her weight from one foot to the other eager to get on.

The agent glanced briefly at the paper he was holding and enquired.

“Mr. Brophy?”

“Yes” I said and proffered my hand, which he inspected briefly then shook it limply in his clammy manicured hand.

“And this is my wife”

I waved my hand in the direction of where she had been standing but she had already bounded off like Tigger.

 

It took about an hour to view everything, the farmhouse, out buildings and the couple of acres of land.

The agent didn’t fancy leaving the confines of the yard presumably he didn’t want to get mud on his expensive Italian shoes.

So we explored the land by ourselves, we had both fallen instantly in love with the old ramshackle farm and by the time Angela and I had wandered back to the yard we had decided to make an offer on the place.

We both had good jobs, well paid jobs, and for a number of years earned more than we could spend and as a result both had substantial savings.

Plus Angela had sold her house the previous year and I only had a tiny mortgage on my flat so we worked out that we could easily afford to buy the farm, renovate the farmhouse for ourselves and convert the out buildings into another property which we could earn a little income on, either as a summer let or as a normal rental, provided of course we could get it for under the asking price.

It would be a gamble and after years of playing safe and being sensible it wasn’t an easy one to make but because neither of us had seriously invested ourselves in a long term relationship before we went for it with gay abandon, so we made our offer to the agent.

“That may not be good enough there are other people interested” He said looking down his nose.

“In fact, I have another viewing this afternoon”

“Well actually that appointment is with me” Angela said sheepishly.

 

As we drove out of the yard I stopped just inside the gate when something caught my eye.

“Look at that” I said pointing out the window, from that angle I could clearly see the signboard that bore the name of the farm.

It read “Angels Farm”

“Well now we know it’s definitely meant to be”

 

So, our offer was accepted, it had taken one day to find the house of our dreams, but it was to be several months before we could move in properly.

The first thing we did after we sold the flat was to buy a second hand caravan that we parked in the farmyard which would be our home until the house was finished, as we had decided we didn’t want to move in until absolutely everything was done although that would very much depend on the severity of the winter.

All of our furniture and worldly goods were put in the barn which we were using for storage.

Now as an accountant and a software engineer, Angela and I were of very little use in regard to the major work that was required, but as project managers we were second to none.

We were very lucky securing the professional help we needed, so many of them were between jobs or had another job that had fallen through and were unexpectedly available.

We employed a constant stream of them, builders, roofers, plumbers, plasterers, electricians, telecoms engineers and tree surgeons, and apart from our talents for project management we were also excellent tea and coffee makers.

On the practical side we were gainfully employed with clearing rubbish and shrubbery from the site and filling skips with anything and everything.

To all intents and purposes, we dropped out of sight for the duration of the project and spent every available minute we had working on the farm.

Although we did make great use of baby brother Greg on several occasions, we were quite selfish and single minded really, but we were even handed about it and we ignored friends and family alike, and we did feel guilty about it but if we could get everything done by Christmas we would be able to see whoever we liked whenever we liked.

Angela did touch base briefly with her parents by phone and we spoke occasionally to Dave and Emma, but we didn’t see them after August.

Throughout October, we made great progress whipping a large section of the acreage into something resembling a garden and in November our hard work was rewarded when the turf was laid.

By the end of November, we were able to get into the farmhouse and start decorating while the professionals made progress on the outbuilding conversion.

As we completed each room the carpets were laid and then we moved the furniture in room by room, and we worked our way through the house and we were counting the days to when we could abandon the caravan forever.

We had both accrued quite a lot of holidays and lieu time over the last few years, so we decided to use them up for the final push which meant we only worked about five days in December.

Then on the twentieth of December with great ceremony (A recording of a fanfare and a bottle of Cava) we took up residence in our dream home.

The next morning when we awoke for the first time in our own bedroom it was with a certain smug satisfaction, after all we had achieved our target with four days to spare and a few pounds left in the budget, it was going to be the best Christmas ever.

“CHRISTMAS!” Angela shouted and sat bolt upright.

“What?” I said as she leapt out of bed

“CHRISTMAS, CHRISTMAS” she was shouting, and running around like a headless chicken trying to dress and run at the same time and she fell over twice.

I just looked on in amusement as she flitted from bedroom to bathroom in various stages of undress.

Then she stood in the bathroom door and said.

“We don’t have anything for Christmas, no decorations, no tree, no cards, no food, no presents, no crackers, no drink we have nothing for Christmas.”

Then the penny dropped and wiped the smile off my face, we had been so focused on getting in the house by Christmas we had forgotten about Christmas itself.

“OH GOD!” I shouted and then joined in the headless chicken dance.

 

So for the next three days we did battle at the mall amidst the throngs of Christmas shoppers and took part in the supermarket trolley dash filling the trolleys with enough food to feed a small army, then we wrote endless cards, wrapped the numerous presents, decked the halls and trimmed the tree.

So, by the time darkness fell on the third day everything was done and presents stood in neat piles ready to be delivered the next day.

I opened a bottle of wine and we sat on the sofa beside the glowing fireplace and I put my arm around her and asked.

“Can we be smug now?”

“Oh yes I think we most certainly can” she replied smiling then she turned her head and kissed me.