Tales from the Finchbottom Vale – (65) The Gentle Giant and the Christmas Maid

Aaron Keller was a great bear of a man, standing 6’ 6” tall, barrell chested with hands like shovels.

But he was brought to his knees by a skinny Little waif standind 4’ 11” by the name of Toni Kendall.

They were both in their mid twenties, both had flaming red hair but he was a gentle giant who barely spoke and she was a little livewire who never shut up.

The other thing that they had in common was more significant and that was the fact that they were in love, though neither of them knew that they were the recipient of that love.

Aaron couldn’t imagine that a beautiful little thing like Toni could ever be interested in him, and she thought he was probably looking for someone as quiet as him.

They both worked at Maxlin’s Holiday Camp in Sharpinghead, she was a chalet maid, and he was a general handyman.

Aaron lived in Sharpinghead, but Toni was from Finchbottom and as the summer season was coming to an end she was running out of time, if nothing happened between them, they would go their separate ways and they would be unlikely to see each other again, but if she got her way, and got her man, she would stay on.

She had been following him around the camp for the whole summer in the hope that he would take her in his arms, but no matter how much she flirted with him the result was the same and she cursed his shyness.

 

Toni finally got her man when they were on what was known as mothball duties, closing down those chalets that would not be needed during the winter season, which meant a major clean and then all the furniture was sheeted.

Because she was so tiny, she managed to enlist the help of the gentle giant with moving the furniture, though she was more than capable of doing it herself, because she was much stronger than she looked, she just used it as an excuse to get close to him.

But despite her managing to get Aaron to help her, it didn’t really help her in the way she wanted because she was such a chatterbox, so even if he could have found the words he wanted to use he would have struggled to get a word in edgeways.

 

However every thing came good in the end when They were on their fifth chalet and all was not going well for Toni as she was hoping he might have made a move on her by that stage, afterall they were alone and had been in very close proximity on many occasions.

She was also annoyed at her self because although she was a confident sparky girl she hadnt just come out with it and ask him out.

What Toni wanted though was for him to ask her but nothing happened so she decided that she had to make him get physical.

Toni started by undoing the braces on his overall as he picked things up and when he reatached that one she undid the other and so on and so fourth until he took action.

 

However she didn’t know when she started messing around quite how physical he would get.

But she wasn’t complaining when the gentle giant had her draped over his shoulder and he was playfully smaking her knicker clad buttocks while he watched the reflexion of his handywork in the mirror.

 

Toni didn’t know when she started messing around with Aaron quite how physical he would get.

But she wasn’t complaining when the gentle giant had her draped over his shoulder and he was playfully smaking her knicker clad buttocks while he watched the reflexion of his handywork in the mirror.

However, he only gave her another two strokes before Toni called a halt to proceedings.

“Put me down” she screamed “Put me down now”

“What’s wrong baby girl?” he said playfully “Have you had enough?”

“Just put me down” she insisted, and as he lowered her to the floor, he cursed himself under his breath for going too far, but he couldn’t help it, he was really having fun.   

“I’m sorry” he said when she was stood looking up at him “I went too far didn’t I?” 

“Don’t be sorry” she snapped and pushed him backwards onto a chair “You haven’t gone far enough yet”

“Oh?” he responded as she inched towards him and when they were nose to nose, she kissed him.

 

After that first time they couldn’t keep there hands off eachother and suffice is to say that she didn’t return home to Finchbottom and stayed on at Maxlin’s and the prospect of spending all winter kissing and canoodling kept them warm.

Though they didn’t have many opportunities for work time kissing and cuddling as they didn’t often work together but when they weren’t working, they didn’t go out in the world much.

But halfway through the winter they got to work together again when they had to reopen some of the chalets, they had mothballed earlier in the year in preparation of the Christmas season and that was when they told each other that they loved them.

 

It had been over a year since Toni and Aaron got together but they were as mad for each other as ever and their second Christmas together was on the horizon.

When November finally arrived, Toni decided it was time to decorate for Christmas but no one could remember where the decorations were put after the previous year.

After two weeks of searching every nook and cranny they were finally spotted in the loft in the staff block by the head of housekeeping, Christine Evans.

 

In the staff accommodation village, there were rows of chalets, similar in design to the guest accommodation but much smaller, and at the center was the staff block.

This contained offices, storerooms, and a common room, with comfortable chairs, where staff can sit around and relax, drink coffee and watch TV or just sit around talking.

 

Christine Evans hadn’t actually seen the decorations herself as she had never been in the loft, and that was because she was scared, partly of the dark but mainly of cobwebs and spiders, but one of her staff had seen them.

 

Toni and Christine were stood talking in the common room when Aaron walked through the door.

“Did you want to see me?” he said to Christine

“Yes, we’ve located the Christmas Decorations” she replied

“So come on big boy” Toni said cheekily “it’s time to get the Dec’s down from the loft”

 

The entrance to the loft, where the Decoration’s had been seen, was via a large hatch way in the common room ceiling.

Aaron reached up one of his great paws and pulled the catch and the hatch swung open and then he pulled down the loft ladder.

“Are you going up?” he asked Christine knowing the answer

“No fear” she said and shivered

“Go on then Danger Mouse” he said to Toni “You go first”

 

Without hesitation she was straight up the ladder and Aaron followed quickly behind her and enjoyed the view up her skirt of her jiggling buttocks as she wiggled up the ladder, he enjoyed the view above the top of her long socks.

She knew that he would and frankly would have been disappointed if he hadn’t.

He would have pinched her bum if Christine hadn’t been looking on.

 

Once they reached the top Toni switched the light on and started looking around but despite the light the corners were quite gloomy.

So Aaron switched on his torch which Toni immediately snatched from his hand.

It was quite a large space and was used as an additional storage area during the peak season and during the course of the year the boxes of Christmas decorations, which had been put up there after the previous year’s festivities, were gradually pushed further and further back from their starting point.

“There they are” she squealed excitedly and rushed to the far corner of the loft.

She then got down on her hands and knees and began pushing boxes in Aaron’s direction.

“Oh shit” she exclaimed

“What wrong luv?”

“The Angel has fallen out of the box” she said sadly “and it’s fallen down behind this thing”

The “Thing” she was referring to was the wooden “A” frame that held the roof up.

“There it is” she said as she shined the torch beam into the darkness.

It hadn’t fallen too far but it was difficult to get at because of all the boxes in the way.

“Can you reach it?” she asked you’ve got longer arms than me”

“A T-Rex has longer arms than you” he retorted and laughed but he clambered up however he couldn’t get close enough to the objective to bring his long reach into play.

“I can’t get close enough” he said as he crouched down “I’ll just have to move these boxes”

“That will take too long” she said impatiently

“I’ll just have to wriggle between the woody things, you can hold onto my legs so I don’t fall”

“Ok” he replied and she headed towards the biggest gap while Aaron moved some of the boxes to accommodate his huge feet.

The gap she went for was a little above Aaron’s waist height but it was higher for a skinny little waif of 4’ 11”.

He was helping her through the small opening between the roof supports and she wriggled and squirmed like a little ginger fish.

 

He was helping her through the small opening between the roof supports and she wriggled and squirmed like a little ginger fish.

“How are you doing?” he asked

“I’ve almost got it” she replied “another couple of inches should do it”

“Ok” he said and manhandled her a bit further and in the process the hem of her skirt was pulled up towards her waist and he was so mesmerised by what came into view that he absentmindedly caressed her plump little buttock .

“What was that?” She asked

“Cobwebs” he lied

“Ok” she replied doubtfully but he didn’t pay attention his mind was on other things as he took something from his pocket.

“I’ve got it” she shouted triumphantly “pull me back”

So he began retrieving her small frame from the darkness and lowered her to the floor.

“See I’ve got it” she said holding the angel up proudly

“Well done, its very nice” he said “But I thought you’d be more interested in this little precious parcel”

“Whats that?”

“I don’t know but it has your name on it” he said

“Has it?” she exclaimed and thrust the angel into his chest and tried to snatch the little parcel from his great paw but as Aaron was such a great bear of a man, standing 6’ 6” tall and she was

a skinny little waif standind 4’ 11” he easily held the gift out of her reach.

“Gimmi, gimmi” she said “you meanie”

“Calling me names isnt going to work” he said

“You used to be a nice boy” Toni said “But now you’re just mean”

“Ok I’ll take it away then” Aaron said and walked towards the loft hatch

“No don’t take it away” she pleaded and hopped up and down

“Please, please, please”

“I dont think you deserve it”

“But I do” she said “I really do”

“oh ok then” he relented and gave her the little parcel which she tore into in seconds to reveal a ring box and she gasped

“Whats this?” she asked in a whisper

“Open it and see” he instructed and after a deep breath she opened the box to reveal a solitaire diamond engagement ring and she gasped again.

“Is this what i think it is?” she asked

“I don’t know” he said “What do you think it is?”

“Is it an…. Engagement ring?” she asked in a childlike voice

“Yes” he replied

“You want to marry me?” Toni asked

“Yes” Aaron said and she launched herself at him and wrapped her arms around his neck, almost breaking the angel in the process, and kissed him. 

Tales from the Finchbottom Vale – (64) Feeling Alive

 

Twenty eight year old Paul Ingram was involved with an older woman, a forty year old woman to be precise, who was a beautiful unhappily married, soon to be divorced Carrington Chase educated woman, called Francesca Carrington-Webber.

Paul and Francesca both lived in the village of Forest Dean situated equidistant between Shallowfield and Childean, she lived in a huge house that backed onto the The Forest Ridge Golf Club, and coincidentally Paul worked for the Golf Club.

 

They became involved after three chance meetings, two on a train and the third more significant one was on the Promenade in Sharpington, where he came upon her small huddled figure on the bench ahead of him in some distress and after some tender moments of consolation lead to them making love in his caravan.

 

Since that night they had had a non-physical relationship and on the rare occasions that they managed to get to spend some time together they always made the most of it, sometimes they had to create opportunities and sometimes they just happened and sometimes one of them managed to surprise the other but the biggest surprise came on the Halloween weekend when she arrived at his caravan dressed as a witch and announced that not only was she divorcing her husband David but that she was staying the night.

 

On the rare occasions that they managed to get to spend the night together they always made the most of it but sometimes they had to create opportunities for example on the day of Derek Bronson’s funeral on a cold February day.

 

The Bronson’s were Francesca’s next door neighbour’s and Daphne was one of her closest friends and obviously on the day of the funeral she was in pieces and she leant heavily on Francesca.

Francesca’s mum stayed in her house and looked after her children and Daphne’s mother looked after the Bronson children IN Purplemere and Francesca looked after the widow in the Bronson house. 

The warm weather of the spring was still in evidence on the day of the funeral and during the wake Daphne completely broke down and so Francesca had her taken home and the doctor was called.

 

Dr Lutchford came downstairs carrying her bag and said

“I’ve given her a sedative” she said “So she’ll sleep until morning” 

“Thanks doctor” Francesca said and as she closed the door behind her she smiled and got her phone from her pocket and typed a message.

 

Paul Ingram was still at the wake and talking to some friends when he felt his phone vibrate in his pocket so he discreetly excused himself and read the message.

“Come now!!!”

 

He discreetly slipped away from the funeral and headed towards the Vicarage and then he turned down the lane by the church, which led to the path that crossed the golf course and from there he traversed the course until he reached the back of Francesca’s house and then he remembered he wanted the house next door and went in the back gate and ran across the lawn and tapped on the door.

 

When the door opened the elegant figure of Francesca stood before him.

“Hello Paul” She said brightly then pretended to be solemn with a half-smile.

“You called madam” he asked

“What kept you” she retorted

“I had a call from a horny middle aged woman who didn’t leave a name” he said “so I tried the pretty ones first”

“You cheeky sod” she said “if I didn’t love you so much I’d send you on your way”

 

She was giggling as he took her in his arms, and when she stopped laughing he became aware of her hot breath on his neck, and her arms tighten around him and she began to nuzzle his neck and he could feel her breath panting on his skin.

“I don’t think that’s a very good idea” he said

“It’s alight Daphne has been sedated” she retorted and began nibbling his ear “So we won’t be disturbed”

“Don’t you find me sexy dressed like this” she whispered “everything I have on is black you know”

“I always find you sexy” he said “And I love you in black, but you are dressed for a funeral and not only is this the widow’s house but she’s upstairs”

 

“I know all that” she admitted “I don’t know what I’d do if I lost you like she lost Derek, I don’t even want to think about that”

“I’m not going anywhere” he said trying to make light of it

“Daphne didn’t think Derek was going anywhere” she said “And look what happened to him”

“I know it was very tragic” he agreed “But that won’t happen to me”

“I just want you to make love to me and make me feel alive” she pleaded while still nuzzling his neck and her hands began to caress up and down his back as her nuzzles turned to kisses.

In response to her plea he reciprocated the caresses and in an instant her soft lips were on his.

 

So on Daphne Bronson’s expensive Persian rug Paul made Francesca feel alive and then they lay beneath a throw and shared the words of love that had become the normal converse between them after making love. 

Then Francesca needed to get up for a pee and she returned to find he had begun to get dressed.

“What do you think you’re doing?” she asked disapprovingly

“Getting dressed” he replied

“Well you can stop that right away” she said

“Why?”

“Because I’m going upstairs to check on the widow and then when I return you’re going to make me feel alive all over again” she said and giggled.

Paul looked at her as she laughed while wearing only stockings.

“Well I don’t think you should go dressed like that” he said

“Ooops” she exclaimed

ON LIFE’S GREAT JOURNEY

 

On life’s great journey

When sweet love crosses your path

Seize it with great urgency

Capture it and keep it safe

Do not let it loose from your grasp

Lest it slip through your fingers, and be gone

Hold it tightly

Cherish it, nurture it, and watch it grow

Until it wraps itself about you

Like a great loving cloak

Protecting you from the world

Making you invincible

And you will know true happiness

But when on your lifelong expedition

And sweet love crosses your path

Ignore it at your peril

For who can say

When it might pass your way again

I SPIED A CHRISTIAN MAID

 

From my pew

Where I stood and prayed

My eyes were fixed

On a Christian maid

 

Is it inappropriate?

My lecherous behaviour

When in church

Worshipping the saviour

 

I studied every inch

Right down to the floor

Instead of hymn numbers

Vital statistics I saw

 

A glimpse of lace

A bra strap showing

My eyes consumed her

Without her knowing

 

The tightness of her jeans

Her shape within

I missed the sermon

Doubtless about sin

 

A sight to feast my eyes

Which affected me so

That I had a quiver in my voice

And a tingle down below

 

Oh lord forgive me

For being such a sinner

But you must admit

She really is a stunner

IN SEARCH OF LARA

From my familiar seat

On the crowded bus,

I thought I saw you today

In the passing throng,

 

My spirits lifted

My heart beat quickened.

And like Dr Zhivago

In search of Lara

I beat against the cold glass.

To attract attention

 

You turned toward me,

And it wasn’t you.

I was mistaken.

Through vision clouded by tears

I had not seen you,

How could it be you?

For you are gone

I HIDE ME

 

I hide me

From the world

Protect myself

Within an amniotic sac

Like a babe in the womb

My heart in a cocoon

Free from harm

Wrapped in cotton wool

Safe, secure,

Out of sight, out of mind

 

I hide me

The best of me

Protected from

Deceitful hearts

And transient desires

The Schemers, dreamers,

And false redeemers

The superficial and the shallow

The morally hollow

Those that would hurt me

Use me and abuse me

All these and more

 

I hide me

The essential me

Keep me hidden

From the bitterness and bile

Of the vindictive and the vile

Free from recrimination

And spiteful retribution

Heart locked safely away

Never to see the light of day

Tales from the Finchbottom Vale – (63) The Propper Attire

 

The Finchbottom Vale is nestled comfortably between the Ancient Dancingdean Forest to the south and the rolling Pepperstock Hills in the north, those who are lucky enough to live there think of it as the rose between two thorns.

And at the far eastern end of the Vale was the traditional seaside resort of Sharpington-by-Sea, complete with a Victorian Pier, seafront hotels, crazy golf, The Palladium ballroom, well maintained gardens, promenade, theatre and illuminations, all the usual things to have a great time by the seaside, as well as amusement arcades and of course the Sharpington Fun Park.

 

The four friends had spent the morning playing a foursome at the Sharpington Dunes Golf Club, they all lived locally in the town of Sharpington-By-Sea and three of them had houses that backed onto the course.

Their foursome had become a regular fixture on their social calendars after widower Dave Whitaker had taken early retirement at the age of 50.

It seemed the right thing to do at the time, his children had flown the nest, his wife had passed and his job had lost its lustre, so he retired and he had never regretted it for a moment.

Retirement enabled him to spend time with his three favourite ladies of leisure, Sarah Price, Katie George and Wilhelmina Winten.

Sarah and Katie were both wealthy grass widows and ten years younger than he was and spinster Willi was three years older and was a retired PE Teacher.

After spending a very pleasant morning on the course they lunched at the club as was their habit and as they sat down at their regular table Willi announced

“I can’t be late home today, Marta is coming to help me tidy the attic”

“It must be important if you’re going to cut your lunch short” Sarah said and they all laughed.

“If truth be told I do rather look forward to the days Marta comes to help me” she said when the laughter had subsided

“She’s really such a nice girl and very good company”

Which was when, the waitress, Georgina, arrived at the table to take their order.

“So you’re not coming to mine for drinks this afternoon Willi?” Katie asked

“I’m afraid not” she replied

“What about you Sarah?”

“No not today” she replied reading a text on her phone “somethings come up”

“Just me and you then Dave” Katie said

“Ok with me” Dave remarked

So after a very nice lunch in very pleasant company, and feeling a little over indulged, they had a rendezvous by their trolleys and prepared for the short stroll across the 18th fairway, apart that is from Sarah Price, who was the only one of the group whose house didn’t adjoin the Golf Course.

“I’ll say goodbye now” she said “I need to pop to the pro shop before I head home”

So Sarah headed in the opposite direction while the other three walked their trolleys across the 18th fairway.

Willi lived 5 houses along from Katie’s house which was next door to Dave’s, so they said goodbye and she walked home to get showered before Marta arrived and Dave went home to get changed and Katie went to her house to freshen up and prepare for Dave’s arrival.

Before leaving home he checked himself in the hall mirror and nodded his aproval, he was still a good looking man of average height and in good physical shape and he still had a full head of sandy hair.

It was about half an hour before Dave walked into Katie’s garden, which was very, in fact it was beautifully kept, and much nicer than his own, but then you get out of it what you put in, and Katie put a lot in to hers.

Whereas his garden was simply functional and he put absolutely nothing into it at all and no effort was expended whatsoever.

All his efforts with regard to the garden went into cutting the grass and sweeping the patio.

Katie on the other hand loved her garden and loved working in it and the result was there for all to see, a delightful English country garden.

 

He walked towards the house and he found that there were drinks on the table beneath the parasol and soft music coming from an MP3, but no sign of Katie.

So he walked toward the kitchen door and stepped inside and there in the middle of the room stood Katie, wearing her golf hat, her golf shoes, argyle socks and her golf glove, and absolutely nothing else.

“Wow” Dave said as he stared at the beautiful woman in front of him in the beautifully accesorised golfing outfit, or what there was of it, Katie was a beautiful woman when fully clothed, but naked she went off the scale.

Despite her being the wrong side of forty she had maintained her figure exceptionally well, only her long brunette hair now had to be enhanced with colouring.

After taking his time to admire her nakedness he then added

“I may be wrong but I think that may infringe the dress code”

“is that right” she said “And what are you going to do about it?”

“What are my options exactly?” he asked

“Well you can report me to the club captain” she replied “or you can make love to me like you normally do”

“I think I’ll do the latter then” he said

“Good choice” Katie replied and removed her glove.

Tales from the Finchbottom Vale – (62) Early Morning Call

Twenty eight year old Paul Ingram was involved with an older woman, a forty year old woman to be precise, who was a beautiful unhappily married, soon to be divorced Carrington Chase educated woman, called Francesca Carrington-Webber.

Paul and Francesca both lived in the village of Forest Dean situated equidistant between Shallowfield and Childean, she lived in a huge house that backed onto the The Forest Ridge Golf Club, and coincidentally Paul worked for the Golf Club.

 

They became involved after three chance meetings, two on a train and the third more significant one was on the Promenade in Sharpington, where he came upon her small huddled figure on the bench ahead of him in some distress and after some tender moments of consolation lead to them making love in his caravan.

 

Since that night they had had a non-physical relationship and on the rare occasions that they managed to get to spend some time together they always made the most of it, sometimes they had to create opportunities and sometimes they just happened and sometimes one of them managed to surprise the other but the biggest surprise came on the Halloween weekend when she arrived at his caravan dressed as a witch and announced that not only was she divorcing her husband David but that she was staying the night.

 

On the rare occasions that they managed to get to spend the night together they always made the most of it.

But in the early hours of one Sunday morning in January he was violently shaken awake.

“You have to go,” Francesca said urgently

“What? When?” he said

“In about an hour” she replied, and giggled as she wrapped herself around him.

“So why did you wake me so early?” he asked

“Why do you think?” she replied and began nibbling on his ear

“Now this is the kind of early morning call I like,” he said just before her lips migrated to his.

 

Francesca had woken him early in the morning so he could sneak out before the neighbours were up and about; but she decided to wake him extra early so she could enjoy him again before he left.

After doing precisely that she left him in bed on that dark Sunday morning in January while she went and washed the lust from her gorgeous body.

Paul smiled to himself and slipped out of bed and tiptoed to the bathroom after her.

He could see her well-defined shape through the glass, and he was already aroused before he opened the door and joined her in the cubicle.

“And what do you think you’re doing?” she asked

“I’m just making sure you don’t miss anything” he replied

“I don’t think anything will be missed darling” she said and kissed him as her soapy hands began to caress his torso.

“In fact I think I’m probably going to get everything”

 

Afterwards she phoned her mum and said she was running late as something had come up and after a long lingering goodbye kiss by the back door he walked home across the golf course in the half-light with an extra spring in his step.

Uncanny Love Tales – (051) On Sabbatical

 

Laying in his bed after an exhausting examination of his estranged wife’s body Kenny asked

“What are you doing here? you didn’t say you were returning to Downshire”

They had been separated for two years after Elaine was offered and accepted a promotion which meant her relocating to Boston, believing he would relocate with her, she was wrong.

“You didn’t ask” she replied

“No, I didn’t,” he acknowledged “but that’s because you said you weren’t coming back”

“Change of plans” she said “I’m on a three-month sabbatical”

“Three months” Kenny exclaimed “what’s the catch?”

“Why does there have to be a catch” she said defensively

“There always is” he pointed out,

“I’m relocating” Elaine retorted

“Where to?” he asked

“Abbottsford” she replied, and he thought he had misheard her

“Abbottsford?” he asked, “How long for?”

“That depends” Elaine replied

“On what?” he said

“You” she replied “Because if you don’t want me back in your life I’ll head back to Boston”

“Of course, I want you back” he said “I never wanted you to go”

“Then I’m staying for ever” she replied, and they made love again.

Uncanny Love Tales – (046) Parisienne

 

It wasn’t the first time Sebastian had taken a girl on the Eurostar, not by a long way, although he was always mindful to make sure each trip didn’t mirror the one, he took on the previous occasion, but obviously the ultimate goal was to make them feel special and then seduce them, and it never failed.

What he had never done before was to return to England with a different girl to the one he took out there.

 

Once they disembarked at Kings Cross, they made their way quickly along the platform to the main concourse where his brother Tristan was waiting.

“Hi Tris, meet my wife Florence” and then he smiled as his brother stood there open mouthed.

 

JUNE

 

On that beautiful day in June

The bells pealed out their tune

And at that joyful sound he knew

He would soon hear her say “I do”

 

Then before him a beautiful sight

As she appeared in bridal white

The hue of the pure white dove

Dressed to symbolise her love

 

When they stood before the altar

He spoke clear without a falter

With a heart so strong and true

He said aloud to the world “I do”

 

SWEET TOOTH

 

I have a picture of you

Which speaks to me,

Speaks in sugary tones

And syrupy words

Of things I liked to hear

When we were both young

But my tastes have changed

A sweet tooth no longer

My palate more mature

More sophisticated

A little less exciting maybe

But you can’t be sixteen forever

But I will always keep

That picture of you

Which speaks to me

In sugary tones

And syrupy words

Just to remind me of the time

When I had a sweet tooth

TIME IS A GREAT HEALER

 

Time is a great healer

That’s what they said

That’s what they told me

After you were dead

Banal words of wisdom

And benevolent attitudes

Empty words and gestures

And worthless platitudes

Only one thing

Can ever take the pain away

And you’re not coming back

No matter how hard I pray

I just wish with all my heart

We could have gone together

And I would not feel so lonely

And I’d be with you forever

SPEECH IMPEDIMENT

Each morning, we stood at the bus stop

Not together, but in proximity

Day after day, week after week

I would glance at her in admiration

But I would never speak to her

There would be an occasional nod

And sometimes a smile

I would have liked to ask her out

I had almost done so many times

But my nerve would always go

So often I formed the question in my head

But the words wouldn’t come out

I always steeled myself

For the big moment, but it never happened

Then one day

When she looked particularly alluring

I thought to myself

This time will be different

This time I have rehearsed,

Though only on the cat,

This time I will do it.

So armed with a well constructed sentence

I made my move

I took a deep breath

Turned to face her,

The sentence looping through my head

Over and over

I opened my mouth to speak

But the sentence did not appear

Instead jumbled words tumbled out

From my anxiously dry mouth,
But not in the order I intended

Some words inappropriately joined together

Giving an all together different meaning

That may have caused her to be offended

It had gone better with the cat.

I just stood there

Spouting my nervous stuttering gibberish

I thought she must think me such an idiot

And fully expected her to laugh in my face

But instead, she smiled at my nervousness

And reformed the words into a sentence,

The very sentence I had rehearsed,

Spoke it back to me

And then smiling broadly, answered yes

BREATH OF SPRING

She Entered

Like a breath of spring

And her presence

Altered everything

She walked in

With such a delicate air

Heads turned

To watch the maiden fair

She then returned

From whence she came

But didn’t leave us

Quite the same

We hoped to see again

That breath of spring

Whose presence

Altered everything

LOVE HAIKU # 2

 

Should the clouds obscure,

the glorious stars at night,

I will still love you

Tales from the Finchbottom Vale – (61) The Lady in Tears

 

It was at the Lord Lieutenants Summer Ball when Dave Knapp found Lady Antonia Johnson-Claassens on the moonlit terrace and his first thought was that he might at last have found someone who he could have an intelligent conversation with, but as he got closer he noticed she was crying.

Dave had been on the prowl for someone with half a brain all evening, his sister, who was supposed to have been his plus 1 had cried off due to one of her bad heads, but when he set off on his after dinner sojourn he didn’t think he would run into Lady Antonia.

Although they did have history of running into each other at such events, they had known each other since University, and when they did attend the same functions they always sought the other out.

However since her engagement to some chinless Rupert, any kind of converse with her had been off the menu and when he saw she was crying he didn’t see that changing.

So although the first sight of her whetted his appetite he instead ended up wetting the shoulder of his dinner jacket with her tears.

When she had calmed down and her sobs began to recede she tried to tell him what was wrong but the tears started to well up in her eyes again and then they ran down her cheeks as she sobbed her heart out and she sat down on the wall.

So Mr. Chivalry again stepped into action and he knelt on the floor beside her and offered himself up to comfort her with arms open wide “I’m sorry” she said gratefully accepting his open arms and burying her tearstained face in his neck.

Dave made encouraging noises and stroked her back but being a shoulder to cry on was the full extent of his expertise.

They held that position for some time until Antonia’s sobs began to get shallower and shallower and eventually abated.

But still she held on to him tightly and began to nuzzle his neck and he could feel her breath on his skin.

 

He comforted her for about an hour in all and when all the tears were gone she told him what was wrong, her fiancé Nigel had chosen the night of the Summer Ball to break off their engagement, not only that but he did it at the party.

She had been very much in love with him, he wasn’t quite the love of her life, but nonetheless to say that she was heartbroken would have been an understatement and then she asked him to drive her home. 

 

When they got to Lady Antonia’s, he drove the car onto her drive.

“Put it in the garage” she said “the remote is in the door pocket”

Dave opened the garage door as instructed and drove in, then closed the door behind them.

They got out of the Range Rover and after retrieving her shrug from the back of the car they went into the house safe from prying eyes.

They emerged in the kitchen where Antonia took the shrug from him.

“Make a hot drink will you” she said “while I get changed”

So Dave boiled the kettle and made them coffee.

He was sat on a stool drinking his when Toni rejoined him in the kitchen about 15 minutes later.

She had indeed changed, she had changed out of the expensive designer ball gown she arrived in and she was now standing in the doorway wearing a tiger onesie and fluffy slippers.

This was not the image Dave associated with her, in his mind’s eye he saw matching black silk underwear, black stockings, and high heeled shoes.

“I thought this would be a bit more comfortable” she said cutely

 

Lady Antonia stood in the kitchen doorway wearing a tiger onesie and fluffy slippers.

“I thought this would be a bit more comfortable” she said cutely

“It certainly looks comfortable” he admitted “Not a sexy outfit is it?”

“I don’t feel particularly sexy today” she said sadly

“I didn’t say you weren’t sexy” Dave corrected her

“You’re only saying that because you feel sorry for me” she said

“Oh no I’m not” he said forcefully, more so than he should have, and it didn’t go unnoticed as she raised an eye brow

Dave and Toni had known each other since university and he had fancied her from the first time he laid eyes on her during fresher’s week, but he had never said anything because she was out of his league.

“I’ve always thought you were sexy, I’ve always thought you were special, far too sexy and special for the types you go out with… or get engaged to”

“Why have you never said anything?” she asked

“Because you’re Lady Antonia Johnson-Claassens and I’m just Dave Knapp the English professor” he retorted “you’re in a different class to me, in every sense”

Lady Antonia said nothing in response as she was taking it all in, she never in her wildest dreams imagined that he felt that way about her and it took her by surprise because she had always felt the same way about him, but she had kept silent because she was afraid.

Afraid of being rejected and of being laughed at, after all he was really smart and she was just dumb Lady Toni.

“So what is it that makes you want me” she asked as she walked towards him in her fluffy slippers

“Is it because I’m posh totty?”

“I do like posh birds” he confessed “but that’s not what attracts me to you”

“So what is it then?” Antonia said as she stood in front of him looking at the floor.

“It’s everything about you” he replied “Your sparky sense of humour, your laugh and your wit and intelligence”

“Now I know you’re lying” she snapped “because I’m not clever, you just saw silly Lady Toni crying over a bloke and you thought, I’m in with a chance”

When she had finished Antonia turned away and then Dave countered

“When I first saw you on the moonlit terrace I actually thought I had at last found someone, after a desperately banal evening, with whom I could have an intelligent conversation, because you are intelligent and you are not stupid by any measure and whoever told you that you are is the stupid one, and when I saw you were crying my first thought was not of a bit of leg over, it was to comfort you, not to judge”

As he was talking he was putting his dinner jacket on to leave and when he had said his piece she still had her back to him but she asked quietly over her shoulder

“You really thought that?”

“Yes” he replied

“Then you don’t think I’m a dullard” Toni said

“No I don’t, nothing could be farther from the truth”

“You don’t just think I’m a vacuous clothes horse? With nothing meaningful to contribute to the world”

“Who on earth has been saying these things to you?” he asked angrily

“Was it Nigel?”

She didn’t respond verbally as she was crying again but she nodded, Nigel was her ex fiancé, Dave walked up behind her and lightly stroked the tops of her arms.

“Don’t cry honey” he said

“I can’t help it” she replied and fresh tears immediately welled up in her eyes as she turned towards him, so he took her in his arms and she dissolved completely into tears.

“It’s ok honey” He whispered, “let it all go”

And as she sobbed uncontrollably into his chest Dave kissed the top of her head.

He held her close and stroked her back as she sobbed until she lifted her head and said

“I’m getting you wet again” 

“I don’t care” He replied “I’m content just holding you in my arms”

On hearing that she broke down again.

Dave was holding in his arms the very beautiful woman he had been in love with since university as she sobbed her heart out and he consoled her with his inadequate words.

Antonia held on to him tightly and began to nuzzle his neck and he could feel her breath on his skin and very soon her nuzzles turned to kisses and she pressed up against him so close a cigarette paper couldn’t have passed between them.

Dave could feel Antonia’s breath on his face before a moment later he felt her lips on his and she kissed him slowly and deliberately.

It was a wonderful feeling for him, to be kissed by the woman he loved, and it was every bit as deliciously sensual as he imagined it would be.

So no one was more surprised than him when he called a halt to proceedings.

“No this isn’t right”

“Why? What’s wrong?” she asked bemused “I thought you wanted me”

“I do, with all my heart” he said “I have dreamt of this since fresher’s week”

“So kiss me then” she urged

“Not like this, not when you’re upset and emotional” he said “Not when you’re on the rebound”

“I’m not on the rebound” she snapped

“But you only broke up with Nigel three hours ago” Dave pointed out

“You may get back together with him or tomorrow morning, in the cold light of day, you may feel differently towards me, and you would only regret anything that happened between us tonight”

Toni didn’t respond immediately but sat down on the kitchen stool and looked thoughtful for few minutes before speaking

“So you do want me”

“Yes”

“But you want to wait, you could have me now on a plate, but you want to wait” she said

“That’s right”

“Oh God I want you even more now” she said as she rushed towards him and hugged him and aafter minute or so she asked

“How long”

“A month” he replied

“A month” she retorted

“Yes” he confirmed “And if you still feel the same way, then we’re in business”

“Am I allowed to see you?”

“Yes” he replied “and we can talk on the phone whenever you want”

“Ok” she agreed “But…”

“But what?” he asked suspiciously

“Will you stay tonight, in case I need another hug” she asked

“Of course” he replied and kissed the top of her head.

So he stayed the night in her spare room and one month later he stayed the night in her bed and they were married six months later.

Tales from the Finchbottom Vale – (60) Christmas Came Early

Twenty eight year old Paul Ingram was involved with an older woman, a forty year old woman to be precise, who was a beautiful unhappily married, soon to be divorced Carrington Chase educated woman, called Francesca Carrington-Webber.

Paul and Francesca both lived in the village of Forest Dean situated equidistant between Shallowfield and Childean, she lived in a huge house that backed onto the The Forest Ridge Golf Club, and coincidentally Paul worked for the Golf Club.

 

They became involved after three chance meetings, two on a train and the third more significant one was on the Promenade in Sharpington, where he came upon her small huddled figure on the bench ahead of him in some distress and after some tender moments of consolation lead to them making love in his caravan.

 

Since that night they had had a non-physical relationship and on the rare occasions that they managed to get to spend some time together they always made the most of it, sometimes they had to create opportunities and sometimes they just happened and sometimes one of them managed to surprise the other but the biggest surprise came on the Halloween weekend when she arrived at his caravan dressed as a witch and announced that not only was she divorcing her husband David but that she was staying the night.

 

But after that, on the rare occasions that they managed to get to spend the night together they always made the most of it, but most of the time they just stole a few hours here and there.

However in December, for a variety of reasons, several weeks had passed and they hadn’t been able to grab even a few minutes together.  

In fact the first time he had seen her in a fortnight was on the day when he had driven over to Abbottsford to do a bit of Christmas shopping, which was when he bumped into Francesca coming out of a very expensive lingerie shop, Silk and Lace, in the Phoenix Shopping Centre.

“Hello darling” she said and air kissed him and then she spotted him looking at the designer carrier bag she was carrying.

“No you can’t look at them” she replied to his unasked question

“Ok I don’t mind seeing them on you, if you insist” he offered

“You’re incorrigible,” she said

“Is that a maybe?” he asked

Unmoved she shook her head disappointedly.

“The chance would be a fine thing anyway” she said quietly

“Have you got time for a coffee?”

“I do” he replied

They went into the Espresso Phoenix coffee house, a really nice one, not one of the chains, and he ordered the drinks as Francesca sat in the corner.

When he joined her he asked

“How about Saturday?”

“For what?” she asked innocently

“To show me your new underwear” he said

“No” she replied

“Why not?” he asked,

“I have to go to a dinner party at Mornington Manor”

She replied “but I don’t really want to go”

He looked at her with puzzlement and then said

“So don’t go, and let me spend the night doing all those things to you that fill your imagination when you’re alone” 

That made her blush scarlet and avert her gaze but after a few moments she looked back at him and smiled.

“I have to go, I’m expected” she said but she reached under the table and held his hand

“But I want what you want”

“I understand” he said

“It will be soon though wont it?” she asked earnestly and held his hand tightly under the table.

“Yes” he replied

When they left the coffee house they air kissed and went their separate ways.

 

Paul was working all day Saturday, so he wasn’t able to get away to the caravan in Sharpington, as he normally would, so he was at home in his flat and spent Saturday night watching a movie and drinking wine but at some point he leant back against the cushions and promptly fell asleep.

He woke up just after eleven o’clock, and he only woke up then because he needed a pee, so he got up and attended to the matter in hand.

When he finished answering his call of nature he was decidedly peckish so he went to the kitchen and made himself a snack.

Paul then returned to his sofa, restarted the movie he had begun watching four hours earlier and sat eating cheese and biscuits’ as he watched Richard Burton and Clint Eastwood taking on the Nazis.

At the end of the film he was still wide-awake so he got up and chose another DVD off the shelf.

He was about a quarter of the way through “The Fifth Element” when he detected the tell-tale clip clop sound of a woman in high heels from outside in the corridor.

He glanced at the clock and thought it must be his neighbour Elaine arriving home from somewhere so he returned his attention back to the action.

A moment later there was a knock on the front door and he checked the clock again before he got up and walked out into the hall, he guessed that Elaine had locked herself out and was knocking for the spare key.

So he opened the door and to his surprise a rather tipsy Francesca almost fell through it.

“Hello Paulie” she said with a flourish.

Francesca was immaculately dressed as usual in a full length green halter necked designer evening dress and a lavish faux fur shrug.

“Wow” he said, “you look stunning”

“Bless you darling” she responded

“You had a nice time then” he said as he helped her into the house.

“I had a wonderful time” she exclaimed

She tottered a few steps then kicked off her shoes, which made her a little more stable on her feet, and then she quickly progressed into the lounge.

All the while talking nine to the dozen about how marvelous the evening was, who was there, what they ate, who said what, and to who.

“And plenty of wine” he asked as she plopped down on the sofa.

“I did,” she said smiling and giggling

“I’m glad you had fun” he said

“Me too” she said coyly

“Good” Paul said as he sat down next to her

“So what are you doing here then?”

“Well I saw your lights were still on from the taxi and I thought I’d come and tell you all about my evening” she explained.

“Why were you in a taxi?” he asked, “I thought you went there with the Conway’s”

“I did” Francesca said

“So why didn’t you come back with them?” he asked

“They left early” she said

“Could no one else give you a lift?” he asked

“David someone offered” she replied

“So why didn’t you accept?”

“What kind of a woman do you think I am? I couldn’t get in a car with a complete stranger” she said affronted

“You weren’t that discerning with me” he said 

“That’s different” she said “with you it doesn’t really count because you’re such a tart”

The statement caused her to roar with laughter to such an extent that she ended up collapsing in a heap with her head and shoulders on his lap.

“You’re my bit of rough” she said and then she disintegrated into laughter again.

“So you decided not to have David drive you home” he said

“It would have been cruel to tantalize him with my gorgeousness for the whole journey only to dash his hopes” she said

This bought about another burst of laughter and when she eventually composed herself she was laying at full stretch on her back looking up at Paul

“Do you still think I’m gorgeous?” she asked, regally draped before him.

“Quite gorgeous” he conceded

“Well quite gorgeous won’t get you a look at the new underwear I bought in Abbottsford the other day” she said

“I bet it does,” he said as he slowly moved his right hand, which had been resting on her chuckling belly, up to caress the roundness of her breast.

“Well maybe” Francesca murmured as she tipped her head back and closed her eyes and then he began tickling her and she was giggling so much she could barely breathe and Francesca wriggled and squirmed beneath his gaze.

But when she got control, Francesca suddenly sat bolt upright and she squealed frantically

“Ok, I’ll let you see my knickers”

And then she pulled herself up so she was seated on his lap and kissed him, he loved kissing her, he thought she was such a great kisser, the best in his experience.

The quality of a kiss is difficult to define and it is like many other things of a sexual nature, which is dependent on the perspective of the participants.

With kissing it can be the thickness of the lips, the width of the mouth, the size of the tongue, the size of the oral cavity and the amount of saliva produced.

For Paul, Francesca scored highly on every criterion and as she kissed him, he thought he had died and gone to heaven.

 

Once they had finished she stood up and looked at him smugly and then took hold of his hand and she said.

“Now come and enjoy my gorgeousness”

Paul got to his feet and they kissed again and then he said

“Just one question before your deliciousness distracts me”

“What’s that darling” she retorted

“How are we going to get you out of here in the morning dressed like that, without anyone noticing?” Paul said

“Let’s cross that bridge when we come to it darling” She purred

“I just might have to stay here with you all day, until I can leave again under the cover of darkness”

“That sounds like a wonderful plan” Paul said and walked her towards the bedroom and took Francesca off to bed and let her take him to paradise.

 

Christmas came early for Paul and Francesca as she did indeed stay with him until after dark on Sunday afternoon.

She would have stayed longer but she had to get back for the girls.

Getting her out of the flat unnoticed was less of a problem than either of them anticipated as he had a draw full of his sisters clothes in the spare room and they fitted his lover well enough and as he walked her home across the golf course they were aided in their stealth by some well-timed freezing fog.