Downshire Diary – (90) Sunday Service

 

On his journey home from Church, William Grant found it quite remarkable just how many women of the village were wandering the streets and lanes of Dulcet St Mary long after the service had ended, despite the inclement weather.

But for 50 year old Brian, these ladies of mixed ages and physical dimensions all dressed in their Sunday best were all in his opinion second best to the lady he was on the way to see.

But as he passed the ladies, every one of them smiled pleasantly at him and he thought to himself as he returned their smiles

“You would not be smiling so politely at me if you knew how you failed to measure up”

When he reached his destination he opened the front door and went straight through to lounge where he found his widowed lover, Gillian Townsend, lying alluringly on the couch.

“Hello Darling” she said “Good service?”

“Yes very good” he replied

“Excellent” she said “now I would like a good Sunday service”

Downshire Diary – (89) Alison and the Spa Guy

 

Alison Holmes went to the University of Downshire where she studied English at Abbottsford and it was for her, like many girls of her age, a life defining time.

She was in halls for the first year and she shared with three other girls Amy Coates, a tall big busted girl, Carole Bean a tall, beautiful and kindly girl and Claire Jarvis a quiet busty brunette.

All four of the girls were studying English in one form or another and apart from their studies they also had in common the fact they were all natives of the Finchbottom Vale.

Claire was from Purplemere, Carole from Childean, Alison from   Finchbottom and Amy from Shallowfield.

The friendship that resulted from, on the face of it, 4 very different characters coming together, lasted for their lifetimes and as they got on so well the four of them decided very early on to rent a house between them for the second and third years.

 

Alison was a little bit on the OCD side of normal but she was a nice girl.

She was, by her own admission, a rather stick thin and plain looking girl with in her opinion three redeeming features, the most stunning eyes, good legs, she liked her legs, and straight shoulder length blonde hair.

Alison didn’t have a boyfriend when she went to university partly because of her OCD but mainly because she hadn’t met the right person until one night she met someone quite by chance.

 

She bumped into Eric Jespersen, in the park one night and they ended up having a rather prolonged kiss up against an old oak tree.

Eric was on his way back to his block after having been swimming and Alison had been to the library.

Afterwards Eric walked her to her block and they kissed in the shadows

“I hope we can do that again sometime,” she said

“I hope we can too” he replied

“You’re all muddy” Amy said as Alison entered the house

“I know I slipped over in the park” she replied

“You went through the park after dark?” Carole asked horrified

“You could have been attacked” Amy added

Alison said nothing, she just smiled, and went to have a bath.

She wasn’t sure if that kiss in the park would indeed lead to anything but she had hopes.but if nothing came of it she had at least snogged the gorgeous Dane in the woods.

And as the weeks went by it veryy much looked like that would be the full extent of it until fate took a hand again when they bumped into each other in the changing rooms at the University swimming pool and kissed again in one of the cubicles.

After that first time they met there regularly for two weeks until they finally progressed to an actual date which was only the first of many.

 

For Alison’s 20th birthday Eric took her to the Dancingdean Spa Hotel in Childean and she was in paradise, there were so many ways for someone with OCD to get clean.

Equally as their relationship had progressed there were also many places for them to get dirty and for three days there was a lot of both.

But that long weekend break to celebrate her birthday was in fact quite momentous because in between the treatments and intimacies their relationship had turned to true love.

Downshire Diary – (88) Naughty on any Level

 

Apart from her normal duties as district nurse Shannon Pond took it upon herself to provide additional services, partly to make sure they regained their self-worth, but on occasions it was more than that but only once did it go beyond the professional.

One of her all too familiar haunts was Shaftsbury Towers in Finchbottom, a rundown modern day slum tenement.

When she got there she found, not for the first time, that the lifts weren’t working and so she had to yomp up 15 flights of stairs up a stairwell that stank of urine.

She was more than a little flushed when she reached her destination, short of breath and short of patience.

Her first patient was Dakota Hogan, a pretty terminally ill 19 year old girl, who was quite naturally depressed.

Shannon was almost 35 and very experienced in her field and she had watched many young people dying before their time.  

Shannon knocked on the door and a moment or so later Mrs Hogan, the patient’s mother answered the door.

“Hello dear” she said

“Hello Mrs Hogan” Shannon said “How’s the patient today?”

“The same” she said blankly “I don’t know how to help her”

“Just be supportive” she said

“It’s hard though dear” she said putting on her coat and going to the foot of the stairs.

“Dakota! The nurse is here” she shouted up the stairs “the pretty one with the blonde hair”

Shannon smiled and Mrs Hogan said

“You can go up when you’re ready, I need to do some shopping”

 

On that day Dakota was in a very positive mood and Shannon had the easiest visit she had had with her, which improved her own mood, but she knew from experience that it was likely to be a false dawn and that there would doubles be darker days ahead.

 

When she reached the stairwell the lift opened and Mrs Hogan got out.

“Oh wonderful, they’re working again” Shannon said

“Yes dear, thank god” she said “How’s the girl?”

“You know, I think she’s a bit brighter” she replied

“Oh I do hope so dear” Mrs Hogan said

 

She was thankful that the lift was working again as she was feeling a bit leg weary.

Shannon said her goodbyes to Mrs Hogan and stepped in and when she turned around she saw Tom Hughes jogging towards the lift.

 

Although she was often willing to go the extra mile for her patients she always drew a line at crossing the line with family or friends of the patient.

But Tom’s mum wasn’t her patient anymore, and as she fancied him like mad, she pressed the hold button.

“Thanks” he said

“No problem, how are you? How’s your mum?” she asked as the lift began to descend

“Good” he replied

“I bet you are” she thought and began flirting with him but her flirtations were abruptly halted when the lift started rattling and shaking and threw the pair of them into one corner.

“I don’t mind if I do” she said and kissed him.
“I’ve wanted to do that for so long” he said

“Me too” she concurred and the lift started moving again.

By the time they had reached the ground floor and emerged into the lobby she was the picture of respectability again and they had a dinner date for that evening.

Downshire Diary – (87) In the Club

 

Brian Myers was a thrice married and thrice divorced retired gentleman of leisure, 55 years of age and everything still in full working order, and he divided his time equally between the Lily Green Hollows Golf Club and the Sharpington Head Yacht Club.

Whichever venue it was he could normally be found in the bar or the restaurant and he was seldom alone, because he was a social animal.

 

Maureen Godfrey was in her late 40s and was a hardworking waitress at the Golf Club and was well aware of Brian’s foibles as she had been on the receiving end of his wit and charm on more than one occasion.

“Good afternoon ladies” she said addressing the two 50 somethings, Helen Cork and Katrina Last, sitting either side of him.

“And gentleman” she added in a tone that made it perfectly clear that she didn’t thing he was one.

“It’s nice to see you keeping such respectable company for a change” she continued then to the ladies again she added

“I hope he’s not leading you astray, he has such a lot of bad habits”

Helen blushed and Katrina gave him a knowing smile.

Maureen then gave him a look that said just stick with the old birds and behave yourself until I get off duty.

What she didn’t know of course was just how badly the two respectable old birds would have liked to behave with him had he given them and encouragement.

Katrina was at that very moment playing footsie with him underneath the table and Helen was fidgeting uncomfortably in her seat as she wondered what she had to do to catch her man.

What neither of them were aware of however was that Brian had eyes only for Maureen so after a very nice lunch in very pleasant company he decided to head for home to Highfinch and had a long afternoon nap to recharge the batteries before he got ready to spend the evening with the lovely Maureen when he intended to ask her to be the fourth Mrs. Myers.

Downshire Diary – (86) Are You Wearing Stockings?

 

Carl Daniels was in Beiderbecke’s, a moody Jazz Club in a seedy corner of Finchbottom.

It was just approaching 11 pm when he arrived and he already had several drinks under his belt and he had just ordered another drink at the bar when he spied her in the gloom, and their eyes met across the room.

He did a double take because he wasn’t expecting to see her there in the club.

 

Sarah Hammond had seen him come in, she had been there for an hour waiting for him, and she was beginning to think she had dressed up for nothing.

 

Carl liked what he saw and was surprised by it, she was so different from “Frumpy” Sarah who he saw in the library every day, but she had caught his eye even as a frump but Sarah didn’t know he was hooked already.

She thought she had to dress like a vamp to get his attention.

 

“Are you wearing stockings?” he asked himself as she got up and walked towards him.

Sarah had to weave in between tables and as she moved slalom like, and she shuffled sideways through narrow gaps.

But stockings or not, Carl very much liked what he saw as she got closer.

“Do you like what you see?” she asked

“I liked what I saw before” he replied

“Really?”

“I’ve always liked what I saw” he said and without speaking she took hold of his hand and led him from the club and when they got back to his flat he got the answer to the question

“Are you wearing stockings?”

Downshire Diary – (85) Alison and the Pool Guy

 

Alison Holmes went to the University of Downshire where she studied English at Abbottsford and it was for her, like many girls of her age, a life defining time.

She was in halls for the first year and she shared with three other girls Amy Coates, a tall big busted girl, Carole Bean a tall, beautiful and kindly girl and Claire Jarvis a quiet busty brunette.

All four of the girls were studying English in one form or another and apart from their studies they also had in common the fact they were all natives of the Finchbottom Vale.

Claire was from Purplemere, Carole from Childean, Alison from   Finchbottom and Amy from Shallowfield.

The friendship that resulted from, on the face of it, 4 very different characters coming together, lasted for their lifetimes and as they got on so well the four of them decided very early on to rent a house between them for the second and third years.

 

Alison was a little bit on the OCD side of normal but she was a nice girl.

She was, by her own admission, a rather stick thin and plain looking girl with in her opinion three redeeming features, the most stunning eyes, good legs, she liked her legs, and straight shoulder length blonde hair.

Alison didn’t have a boyfriend when she went to university partly because of her OCD but mainly because she hadn’t met the right person until one night she met someone quite by chance.

 

She bumped into Eric Jespersen, in the park one night and they ended up having a rather prolonged kiss up against an old oak tree.

Eric was on his way back to his block after having been swimming and Alison had been to the library.

Afterwards Eric walked her to her block and they kissed in the shadows

“I hope we can do that again sometime,” she said

“I hope we can too” he replied

“You’re all muddy” Amy said as Alison entered the house

“I know I slipped over in the park” she replied

“You went through the park after dark?” Carole asked horrified

“You could have been attacked” Amy added

Alison said nothing, she just smiled, and went to have a bath.

She wasn’t sure if that kiss in the park would indeed lead to anything but she had hopes.but if nothing came of it she had at least snogged the gorgeous Dane in the woods.

And as the weeks went by it veryy much looked like that would be the full extent of it until fate took a hand again.

 

Eric was a regular swimmer and he was at the University pool almost every day but for Alison it was a rarity as she wasn’t really sure how hygienic a public pool could be.

But she allowed herself to be persuaded by her flat mate Carole who didn’t want to go alone.

It was a very modern facility with unisex changing rooms which had two long rows of cubicles’ flanked by lockers.

Eric had finished his swim and was in a cubicle at the far end of the row, furthest from the pool, where he got himself dry and was about to redress but realised he’d left some of his stuff in his locker.

So he wrapped his towel around his naked lower half and went to retrieve his pants and socks.

It was at the point when he spotted Alison, who recognised him instantly and smiled warmly.

He then nodded in the direction of his cubicle door and she blushed

“Come on Ali” Carole called “come in and close the door”

Alison nodded and smiled and mouthed the words “Five minutes”

“Ok I’m coming” She replied to Carole.

Eric got dressed in his cubicle while he waited and was surprised by the presence of butterflies in his stomach, after all they had only had that one lingering snoggy encounter in the woods.

 

He wasn’t the only one dealing with the anticipation because Alison was silently getting changed hoping that she hadn’t misread the situation and was on a promise for another kiss. 

 

“You go ahead and I’ll catch up with you” Alison said

“Ok but don’t be long” Carole said as she moved away.

After a moment or two, she tapped lightly on the cubicle door and when it opened Eric was there wearing his street clothes which made her feel a little self-conscious as she only had on a black one piece swimsuit and clutching a towel to hide her modesty.

“Hello Ali” He said

“Hi Eric” she said and her eyes looked anywhere than at him directly.

He on the other hand cast an appreciative eye over her swim-suited figure, such as it was, but sensing her embarrassment he pulled her into the cubicle and closed the door and then he kissed her.

When the kiss was over she looked at him and pleaded

“Again please”

“Are you sure?” he asked her

“Oh yes Eric” she replied

“Carole will wonder where you are,” he said feebly but she ignored him and kissed him so he couldn’t speak again.

 

“Do you come here every day?” she asked

“Yes, the same time every day” he replied

“That’s good to know” she said coyly

Alison was anxious to go and find Carole so they shared a soft, gentle, and affectionate farewell kiss before he opened the door and she went in search of her friend.

“I’ll see you tomorrow then?” he called after

Downshire Diary – (84) A Rude Awakening

At the western end of the Finchbottom Vale lay the small market town of Childean and on the outskirts was the Dancingdean Spa Hotel.

The manager was Ian Ferguson and he was 28 years old and his father was owned a substantial share in the Hotel which influenced the decision to appoint him.

However it may have been nepotism that got him the job but it was his hard work and diligence that kept him in place and his choice of old school friend Declan Hughes as his assistant certainly didn’t hurt. 

Declan also made one or two inspired appointments Mark Humphreys and Rachel Hunt as Hospitality manager and assistant respectively and they worked as a very effective team although at times it wasn’t entirely clear who managed who.

The Sarah Busby birthday surprise fiasco was a good case in point.  

 

Sarah was a big Afro Caribbean woman who worked in the hotel kitchen and had worked there for more than 20 years.

She was also celebrating her 50th birthday which was why a large bouquet of flowers was to be delivered to the hotel and presented to her for her birthday.

However to all involved the hospitality manager, Mark Humphreys had given her the day off.

“Well you’ll have to take them round to her house” Rachel said crossly

“Can’t we just give them to her tomorrow” he said

“Oh give me strength” she retorted

“Is that a no then?” he asked

“Men” she snapped and slammed his office door

“I’d better take them round then” he said to himself

 

As it was a nice summer afternoon he decided to walk into Childean and deliver the flowers.

He walked up the path to Sarah’s house and knocked on the door but when it opened, instead of the round and jovial Sarah he was greeted by someone altogether different, younger, skinnier and prettier.       

“Hello” he said with surprise

“Can I help?” she asked

“I was looking for Sarah” he asked, and indicating the flowers. 

“I’m afraid aunty has gone out for the day” she said

“Your Aunty?” he asked

“Yes” she replied “I’m staying with her for a while”

“I’m Mark Humphreys from the Hotel” he said

“I’m Michele” she said and smiled because her aunty had told her all about him and how nice he was.

“Why don’t you come in?”

“Ok” he said recognizing the look on her face

She led him into the sitting room while she went into the kitchen to put the flowers in water.

Michele Singer was a few years younger than he, tall and slim with thick back hair, she was a skinny girl but not in a boney way she just had a skinny frame.

Her eyes were big and almost black and she had a huge toothy smile, which lit up the whole of Childean.

“Would you like tea or coffee?” She called from the kitchen

 

The next two hours passed by really quickly as they sat in the lounge chatting and he would have stayed longer had he not received a phone call from his assistant Rachel asking where the hell he was.

“I have to get back to the Hotel I’m afraid”

“Oh that’s a shame” she said “I was rather enjoying our chat”

“Yes me too”

“Are you free this evening?” Michelle asked hopefully “I could feed you”

“That would be lovely” he said as he stepped outside “7.30?”

 

Michele cooked him a lovely meal which they ate leisurely accompanied by a liberal amount of wine and after he had helped her clear away they returned to the lounge where she steered him to one of the armchairs and pushed him down and as he sat down he pulled her down with him so she was sitting on his lap.

Because she was so tall, her head was above his, and smiled at his upturned face and then she kissed him.

 

Mark awoke early in the darkness to the sound of the James Blunt emanating from the clock radio, he could just make out, in the half light, a delicately elegant finger reaching out and silencing it.

Then he thought “I don’t have a clock radio” so he tried to figure out whose bed he was in and more importantly who the owner of the elegant finger was.

He tried desperately to identify some point of reference in the room, the problem is that the brain processes what you can see and then fills in the blanks with things from your memory bank, for example, a carelessly discarded dressing gown can appear to be a sleeping dog or a sweater dropped haphazardly becomes a sleeping child.

Mark was rescued from his confusion when a head emerged from beneath the duvet and Michelle kissed him on the chest and it all came flooding back to him.

 

Michelle Singer was the niece of Sarah Busby, one of his employees.

She had been sent by her mother to stay with her aunt to keep her out of mischief and instead she had fallen in love and seduced the object of her affections.

She was draped across him breathing peacefully when Michelle looked up at him and smiled and suddenly the penny finally dropped and she gave him a shocked wide eyed look as she realised that they were still in her bed together and her Aunt was in the next room.

“What do we do now?” Mark whispered “Will she come in?”

“No” she replied “she never does”

“Then you keep watch and I’ll sneak down stairs when it’s clear” he suggested

“No, wait until she goes in the shower” Michelle said

“Ok” he acquiesced

Just then they heard Sarah’s bedroom door open and they both held their breath and then another door opened.

“She’s in the bathroom” Michelle said “you need to go”

“Ok” he said “I’ll go first and you follow me down”

She nodded and he kissed her then Mark turned and opened the door.

He tiptoed across the landing with her right behind him, but he had just stepped down onto the first step when the bathroom door opened, Mark pressed himself flat against the wall, and when he looked back towards Michelle and she looked like a rabbit caught in the headlights.  

“I’m finished Michelle darling” Aunt Sarah shouted

“Ok Aunty I’m just going to put the kettle on” she replied and then Sarah’s bedroom door closed and they let out long synchronised sighs before exchanging a relieved smile and proceeded cautiously down the stairs.

 

At the front door she hugged him and asked

“When am I going to see you again?”

Hoping it wasn’t just a one night stand

“How about tonight?” he suggested

“Really?” Michelle exclaimed

“I’ll take you for dinner” he said “The Phoenix in Shallowfield”

“That’s a bit special” she said

“So are you” Mark replied