Monday, 20 March 2017

Downshire Diary – (21) The Big and the Beautiful

(Part 01)

Owen Carrington’s star was definitely in the ascendency after the success of his first Romantic novel “The Maiden Muse” but the change in the fortunes of his writing career were not universally well received, his publisher liked it, his new agent loved it, the bank manager was ecstatic about it but his mother was disappointed by it because she thought it was a bit girlie.

But it wasn’t just his writing career that was climbing high, so was his love life thanks to his muse and lover, Juliana Molesworth, who had brought his writers block to an end.
But alas she had gone back to University and wouldn’t return until after her exams and as he had fallen hopelessly in love with her the only antidote for his wanting her, in her absence, was to throw himself in to his writing.

Since he had become a writer of bodice ripping romances it had proved to be an occupation which suited him very well indeed.
And it suited him in many ways, but the main benefit was that he was able to work at home, so he had no tedious commute every day and his working day was flexible to the point that some days he didn’t write at all.
This afforded him the opportunity of playing a round of Golf during the working week when most people had their noses to the grindstone or even taking a day out to go fishing.
And it was on such a day, a Tuesday in fact, at the end of May when he had arranged to go fishing with his next door neighbour, Dawn Symonds who was a year or two older than him and stood over six feet tall with short auburn hair.
As it was the closed season for coarse fishing they went up to the River Trott in the Pepperstock Hills.
He and Dawn had gotten on like a house on fire from the moment he first arrived in the village and they had even kissed on one occasion but it was very disappointing and there was no spark but he and the well-built six-foot tall redhead with the massive breasts became the best of friends.
When he told her about him and Juliana she was almost as happy as he was about it.
“I’m very jealous though” she said “but that’s only because I haven’t found anyone”
As they stood in the fast flowing waters of the River Trott she opened up to him about how lonely she was, she had many friends but she didn’t have a special someone to comfort her when she was down or laugh with her when she was happy.

It was a pleasant morning; warmer than it had been the previous few days, with the mainly blue expanse of sky broken only by the occasional passing cloud.
Considering the clement weather the river was very quiet, and they saw no one else on the water or the banks for three hours.
They managed a couple of decent trout a piece before they gave up for the day and headed back to Denmead and barbequed the fish.
Later that evening he had a shower and shave and was preparing to spend the evening at the pub to catch up with the latest village gossip and participate in the pub quiz when the phone rang, and it was Juliana.

(Part 02)

It was the first week in June when Owen found himself sitting in the reception at Bramstock, Goodman, Crossfield and Bushe, the firm of Solicitors handling his late Uncles estate.
He wasn’t there for anything specific it just happened that he was up in Abbottsford for the day.
He had an important lunchtime meeting with his publishers and a less important Dinner meeting with his new agent, Leonard Silverman, so as he was left with some time to kill and as he was roughly in their neck of the woods he thought he would just sandwich the solicitors in the middle and pop in to make sure they weren’t dragging their heels.
He thought it was a case of out of sight out of mind with solicitors, although they always remembered you readily enough when money was due to them.
Anyway he sat there for about an hour waiting for Ms. Bushe to become available, whom he presumed to be some mannish ball breaker who enjoyed keeping people waiting.
However he didn’t have to wait too long when Ms. Bushe did appear she was much more pleasant than he imagined and in fact he spent a very pleasant hour with the very un-mannish Ms. Bushe and they went through the papers and she assured him that everything would be tied up with a bow in the coming few weeks.

The Dinner meeting was just as tedious as he thought it would be, Agents being all cast in the same mold, they all talk big, make ludicrous forecasts of your prospects, name drop shamelessly and squeeze every penny out of their clients as is humanly possible and he was sure that his, newly acquired though he was, would be no exception.
Lionel chose a trendy nouvelle cuisine restaurant, The Wooden Slipper serving high flavour, low-calorie, and substance lacking dishes, where minor celebrities were known to dine.
The food was good, if you like tiny artistic arrangements the size of a Hors d'oeuvre, on a slab of welsh slate but there wasn’t enough to live on.
When it was time to leave Owen was hungrier than he was when he arrived, and even though he made a big show about buying him such a “wonderful” Dinner he knew he had probably already figured out a way of claiming it as a legitimate business expense for himself while actually stiffing Owen with the bill.
He stopped at the first fast food joint that he came to which happened to be a Burger Bar and he ordered the biggest one he could see on the menu.
Having sufficiently filled the hollow with reconstituted meat, saturated fats and carbohydrates he ambled his way to his hotel, and on his way he phoned Lionel and sacked him.
He would have liked to stay at the Regents Hotel but it was a bit rich for his blood, as the royalties hadn’t at that time began to arrive, so he found a place close by for a third of the price called the Black Heart.

(Part 03)

He was sitting at the bar at The Black Heart Hotel, drinking a large Whisky and Soda and doing a spot of people watching, an occupational hazard for writers, but the bar was so empty that he exhausted that exercise in less than five minutes.
So he turned his thoughts to Juliana, his lovely redheaded girlfriend who would be home from University in a few days and he was looking forward to seeing her more than he could have imagined and it was when he was preoccupied with thoughts of Juliana that a voice broke in on his thoughts.
“Owen Carrington?” it said
He turned around and the voice belonged to an enormous man, six foot seven, good looking and only a few years older than him, whom he didn’t recognize.
It turned out that he was named rather inappropriately Paul Little, and he was a literary agent who had been drinking with Lionel Silverman when Owen phoned him to sack him.
“He was not pleased and his language was very colourful”
Paul said and laughed
A few drinks later Owen had a new agent and he had invited him down to Denmead for the weekend to seal the deal.

Paul Little went to Denmead a couple of days later and because he had car trouble he had to get the train which got him into Denmead after dark.
It was getting late when Paul got off the train but because it was a clear night and Owen had said it was only a ten minute walk from the station to Owen’s cottage he decided to set off on foot, he was using the satnav app on his phone which took him down a very poorly lit lane with densely foliaged trees which blocked out the moonlight.
The lane seemed to meander its way beneath the canopy of trees and even with his eyes fixed on his phone he was making steady progress and according to the screen he was within a couple of houses of his destination when he was violently knocked off his feet by a large figure in the dark.
“Excellent” he thought he was only in the village for ten minutes and he was being mugged by a yokel.
He finished up horizontal on the ground and his substantial assailant ended up laying on top of him, using his phone he illuminated the face of his assailant and was surprised to see it a woman, but not as surprised as he was when she kissed him full on the mouth.
“I’m so sorry” she said “I don’t know why I did that”
“Don’t apologize” Paul responded because he had rather enjoyed it so he did the only thing he could do under the circumstances and that was kiss her back.

When Dawn left her house she was running late for a parish council meeting and wasn’t watching where she was going when she bumped heavily into another pedestrian and they both fell to the ground her victim on their back and her on top of them and when she was lying there nose to nose the smell of their aftershave was delicious and when he used his phone as a torch she got a glimpsed of the gorgeous smelling casualty she was suitably enamored with his look that she kissed him and was delighted to find he was a damn good kisser.

(Part 04)

When Dawn left her house she was running late for a parish council meeting and wasn’t watching where she was going when she bumped heavily into another pedestrian and they both fell to the ground, her victim on their back and her on top of them and when she was lying there nose to nose the smell of their aftershave was delicious and when he used his phone as a torch she got a glimpsed of the gorgeous smelling casualty she was suitably enamored with his look that she kissed him and was delighted to find he was a damn good kisser.

But all at once, in the middle of the best kiss she had had in a long, long time, she suddenly got a dose of reality and became self-conscious and broke away from the embrace.
“I’m so sorry” she said and rushed away embarrassed
“But…” he called after her but she disappeared into the darkness.

“Wow” Paul said in the aftermath of the kiss with the mystery girl, it was quite extraordinary and he wasn’t expecting it.
And then he completed his walk home he thought to himself how funny life could be.
He knocked on the front door and was scratching his head when Owen opened the door.
“Hi Paul” he said “is everything alright?”

Inside Owens house Paul explained how out in the lane he had been knocked to the ground and thoroughly snogged.
“Seriously?” Owen exclaimed “Did you get a look at the assailant?”
“I did”
“Male of female?” Owen asked
“Female obviously” Paul replied with affront
“Ok any other clues” Owen added
“Pretty, I think” he continued “Short hair, red possibly”
“Ah” Owen expressed
“Ah?”
“It sounds like Dawn” Owen said
“Dawn?”
“Yes my next door neighbour, she’s a nice girl”
“Not a nutter then?” Paul asked
“No not at all” Owen replied “And snogging strangers in the lane is totally out of character”
“Well maybe it wasn’t her then” Paul said
“I’ll ask her” Owen suggested
“No don’t do that” Paul pleaded

Dawn was worse than useless at the parish council meeting as her thoughts kept straying to the extraordinary kiss in the lane and that night in her bed those thoughts turned to dreams.

The next morning while Paul was showering Owen slipped next door and rang Dawn’s door bell.
“Hi Dawn” he said
“Oh hello” she responded absentmindedly
“What’s up?”
“Oh God I’m so embarrassed” she replied and walked inside so Owen followed
“What about?”
“I sexually assaulted someone in the lane” she blurted out
“Tell me more” Owen said and Dawn gave him all the sordid details of her assault and after she had finished he said.
“I think you’re safe”
“I don’t know about that” she said doubtfully
“Just relax” he said “come to dinner tonight with Juliana and my agent”
“Oh I don’t know” she said
“I insist” Owen said

Before he went back into his own house he phoned Juliana who had just returned from University.
“So where are you taking me tonight?” she asked
“It’s funny you should ask that, we have dinner guests tonight but tomorrow I’m all yours” he said and went on to explain his plan.

(Part 05)

As Juliana approached Owens house she made a quick diversion and called at Dawn’s house first so they could go to Owens together and when Juliana and Dawn left the house they were both made up to the nines.
“Are you sure you wouldn’t rather spend the evening just with Owen?” Dawn asked
“Don’t be daft” Juliana replied as they reached Owens door
“I’ve got the whole summer to be with Owen”
Juliana knocked lightly on the door and went straight in
“Hello” she called
“Who’s that?” Owen called back
“It’s the strumpets” Juliana replied
“Ok make yourself comfortable but I can’t give you long, my girlfriend will be here any minute” Owen said and then his head appeared around the kitchen door
“You’ll get a slap” she said and then glowed proudly on hearing him call her his girlfriend, and she walked towards him and kissed him.
“Wow you two look gorgeous” he said and kissed Dawn’s cheek
“Thank you” Dawn said liking the compliment but still wished she wasn’t there.
“Can you do drinks Hon?” He said to Juliana and added
“Go out on the patio Dawn the other guest will be down in a minute”
Dawn walked into the lounge and then onto the patio and Juliana followed Owen back into the kitchen, she knew that he’d already have the wine ready and what he really wanted was to give her a welcome home snog and she was more than happy to oblige.

After a very satisfying reunion kiss Juliana emerged from the kitchen carrying a tray with a chilled bottle of wine in a bucket and the glasses.
She set down the tray and poured the wine just as Owen and Paul followed her in.
“Ok you two, this is my new agent, Paul” Owen said and to Paul he added “the shorter ginger one is my girlfriend Juliana and the big auburn haired one is my neighbour Dawn”
Paul was not only tall but was skinny and he brushed his sandy hair off his forehead and shook their hands in turn.
“Pleased to meet you again” he said to Dawn
“Likewise” she replied and blushed
“You two have met before then?” Juliana asked innocently although she already knew the answer
“Briefly” Dawn replied
“But memorably” Paul added and Dawn blushed again, but neither of them elaborated.
As the others settled down in their seats Owen winked at Juliana and went out to the kitchen.

During the course of the meal, with an Author, an agent and an English Literature student at the table the conversation naturally turned to writing but Dawn didn’t seem to notice and her eyes rarely left Paul.

Desert followed two excellent first courses and coffee and liqueurs followed desert and the conversation had covered the full range of subjects and Saturday had become Sunday and Dawn and Paul only had eyes for each other.

Juliana and Owen meanwhile began clearing the table and looking back from the kitchen door he said
“I think they might be smitten”
“I don’t think there’s any might about it” Juliana replied and smiled it was their intention to match-make and they appeared to have succeeded.
Owen did think that if it didn’t work they would at least have a pleasant foursome.
But he had underestimated just how much they were attracted to each other.
“We breathed lightly on the embers” he said enigmatically
“I don’t think we had anything to do with it” Juliana pointed out
“They didn’t need us to play cupid”

At the end of the evening, or more precisely at the start of the day, Dawn fumbled around for her bag trying to delay the inevitable moment when she would have to leave.
Which was when Paul helped Dawn to her feet and said
“Please let me walk you home”
“Thank you, but its only next door” she replied feeling self-conscious as Owen and Juliana looked on
“I insist, I know it can be dangerous out in the lane after dark”
He said and Dawn giggled
Ten minutes later while Owen walked Juliana home Dawn and Paul shared a more controlled and measured embrace in the moonlight and there was a definite spark.

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