I could not weep
As
I sat at his side
His
hand once as strong as atlas
Now
to weak to grip
Weak
like a babe
More
so
I
could not weep
As
I watched the frown
Furrowing
his weathered face
Grey,
expressionless
And
as his frown faded,
As
the morphine takes control
I
could not weep
As
he lays motionless,
Breath
shallow
Silent,
almost
But
for the occasional groan
Beneath
the morphine
I
could not weep
At
his deathbed
As
the monster within
Crept
through his organs
Hastening
the end
For
him and for itself
I
could not weep
As
his muscles relaxed
And
the pain was no more
As
he exhaled his last
And
his soul passed
When
he was at peace
I
could not weep
Not
because it wasn’t macho
Nor
for lack of love
It
was perhaps numbness
Or
a need to be strong
For
family, others
I could not weep
Not
when he was diagnosed
Nor
when he released his grip on life
Not
even at his funeral
I
could not weep
When
my father died