PICKING FROM THE MENU

 

Looks can be so deceiving

When searching for a lover

If you make an instant judgment

Just hope they can deliver

 

So ladies beware when choosing

The macho over the wimp

If you expect to get king prawn

You may end up getting shrimp

Angela With The Elphin Face

 

If you looked closely at Angela Buckland you couldn’t help but see why she was one of the most popular girls at school.

Her Elphin face had a shape and symmetry that was easy on the eye and her figure was to die for.

Although there were girls who were more classically beautiful they didn’t have any of the character of Angela’s.

Her silky red hair shone and shimmered as she moved her head and her brown eyes bore into your soul when you met their gaze.

As if her unique beauty was not enough she was also athletic, artistic, intelligent and sexy.

I think everyone, boy or girl that ever met her fell instantly in love with her.
But I had been in love with her since before she blossomed.

Despite all the attention though Angela managed to keep everyone of the suitors at bay which led to the rumour that she played for the other side.

I never believed that for a moment and I had known her longer than anyone.

Because Angela Buckland was the girl next door.

And she had lived there since she was three and we had been best friends since the beginning.

So when she was approaching her seventeenth birthday I wouldn’t have been at all surprised to get an invitation we had after all been friends since nursery school.

 

Having established that Angela was one of the popular group, I was in no uncertain terms not.

I was not athletic, artistic, or sexy but without being immodest we did have intelligence in common and my forte was science, in particular Physics.    

So under normal circumstances, friendship and intelligence aside, why would one of the popular girls invite a Science geek to her 17th birthday party?

Anyone not close to her could be forgiven if they were surprised but I was not.

They would have been further surprised when it turned out I was only one of six guests at the party one of those being Angela herself.

Though for me it certainly wasn’t a surprise knowing her as I did she was never a flashy person.

She didn’t want a big flashy party with lots of superficial friends.

So there was just Angela, me and four other guests who were also old friends chosen for their friendship and not their social standing.

Kelly Reed was also one of the popular girls but she started with us in nursery as well and she had no affectation either, her cousin Roy Pollard who was 18, Mark Clench and Susanna Perioli.

The party was at a Chinese restaurant called the Blossom Garden which was Angela’s favourite.

As you would expect from such a great restaurant it was a really excellent meal and as Roy was 18 he ordered wine with meal so as we reminisced about our shared history we laughed until we cried.

 

As we left the Blossom Garden and got down to street level we had the usual hugs and kisses on the pavement and then Kelly went accross the road to where her Dads car was parked.

Then as Mark, Susie and Roy all lived in the same neck of the woods went off to get the bus and Angela and I headed to the station to catch the train.

 

As we walked up station approach I said

“I had a really great time”  

“Yeh me too” she replied

“Wasnt it great to get the six of us together again?”

“We should do it more often” I suggested

““We” should get together more often” Angela said

“What just the two of us?” I asked

“Yeh” she said coyly

“Just you and the geek?” I asked with surprise

"You’re not a geek” she said defensively “And anyway if you were that wouldn’t stop me fancying you," she said.
"You fancy me?" I asked pointing at myself
"Didn't you know?"
I shook my head
"What about you?” she asked shyly

“Do you fancy me?

“I don’t know about fancying you” I said and she was clearly crestfallen for a second

“But I’ve been in love with you since we were 7 if that counts”

“Pig” she said and laughed before she kissed me softy on the lips which led to the most wonderful spine tingling embrace that seemed to last forever.

When it ended she looked at me with her soulful eyes and smiled the most loving smile.

I returned her smile and wanted to say something fitting for the moment but I was lost for words.

“Wow” she said beating me to the punch

Then she giggled and ran off up the road and shouted over her shoulder

“You’ll have to marry me now”

TIMING IS EVERYTHING

 

We were both young me and him

And full of vigour and vim

So why was our sex life so grim?

 

We understood the mechanics

We enjoyed each others bits

And knew where everything fits

 

So why? Pray tell me, was it

When we get down to do it

Our expectation were never met

 

We tried every artificial aid

Roll play and other forms of charade

So a radical decision was made

 

We visited a doctor’s surgery

In hope to relieve our anxiety

Hooray there was nothing wrong with me

 

I could set my mind at rest

That when he was rummaging in my vest

I was functioning at my best

 

There was no problem with me, but him

Though both full of vigour and vim

He was the reason our sex life was grim

 

Because when we got down to jigger

And he was grappling with my figure

It quickly set off his hair trigger

 

His defect was certainly a pity

But I decided to dump Mr. Brevity

And found a man with sexual longevity

A PORT IN A STORM

Is it too much to ask

For my love to be returned

Just one simple gesture of warmth

That is all I’ve yearned

 

A burning passion is hoped for

Though in truth not expected

A heartfelt acknowledgement

But no heart has been detected

 

Drifting in and out of my life

As if I’m a convenient respite

Then when interest wanes

I am again alone in the night

 

Each bland uncaring rebuff,

Is another dagger to my heart

My love is treated with apathy

But I miss it when we’re apart

 

I chastise my self for my weakness

For accepting it and making do

I deserve better than this

I deserve a love that’s honest and true

 

I have paid all my dues

I have paid in like an endowment

Never made a withdrawal

Still there is no return on my investment

 

Now my will to continue is gone

As I am left once more Forlorn

I pray for my anguish to be at an end

Like a bird impaled upon a thorn

GONE ARE THOSE JOYFUL DAYS

Gone is that joyful day

When we stood before God

Humble in his blessed presence

And we were joined as one

Everything ahead of us

 

Gone are those joyful days

Full of love and laughter

Days of tender moments

And heady nights of passion

Everything ahead of us

 

Gone are those joyful days

When we walked along the shore line

Sunlight glinting on the water

The sea breeze blowing through our hair

Happy and carefree, hand in hand

Everything ahead of us

 

Gone are those joyful days

When God blessed our union

And delivered perfect joy into our lives

As our little family grew

And we had everything we desired

 

Gone are those joyful days

When your smile lit up my life

And my heart brimmed over with love for you

Before it was broken in two

And you were still here with us

 

Gone are the joyful days

Since you have gone ahead of me

Now God has you by his side

And I will miss you deeply until that day

When God has reunited us

 

I look forward to that joyful day

When we stand once more together

But though my heart is broken

I must delay our reunion

Our sweet children need me

And I must love them double now 

Snippets of Downshire Life – Sharpington Sundae

 

The traditional seaside resort of Sharpington-by-Sea with its Victorian Pier, seafront hotels, crazy golf, The Palladium ballroom, well maintained gardens, promenade, theatre and illuminations, has all the usual things to have a great time by the seaside, as well as amusement arcades and of course the Sharpington Fun Park and sisters Rachel and Kay Wilkinson live together in the house they grew up in, in the grand neighbourhood of Granite Hill, which in a nod to San Francisco, the locals had nicknamed Nob Hill.

They were both in their early thirties, and were only 13 months apart and they were very close in every other way and did everything together, and as they were both single, one of the things they did on a regular basis was to look for someone to change their single status.

But they were thwarted in their efforts time and time again and invariably ended up with their friends Penny Van Der Zelden and  Sarah Whitmarsh either at the Pier Pancake Palace located by the entrance of the Pier or in  Bizzoni's Ice Cream Parlour, which was opposite, and it was in the latter where they first laid eyes on Peter and Paul Cooper, who were in town on holiday for two weeks, and  they were perfect, good looking, funny, the same ages, and more importantly, single, and they seemed to be interested, but after ten days they hadn’t progressed any further than hanging out at the Fun Park, and eating a lot of ice cream at Bizzoni’s.

 

The sisters were very frustrated by their inability to land their catch so on the boys last night in Sharpington they planned to up their game and get them on the dance floor at the Palladium Ballroom and induce a little bodily contact.

They arranged to meet at the entrance to the Pier at eight o’clock and Kay and the boys were on time but Rachel wasn’t.

She worked at the Chandlers beyond Whitecliffe Head and the dunes and she had to stay much later than she planned as there was a problem with the alarm when she was locking up.

When she eventually got away she made a beeline for the Pier following the path that led firstly past the dunes and then a row of brightly coloured beach huts.

If she continued on the path it would lead to the end of the promenade but she took decisive action and decided to take the more direct route across the beach and was in constant touch with her sister via text message as she walked.

However her decision to cross the beach proved to be problematic firstly because, although it was indeed the shorter route in would have been much easier to walk on the paved promenade rather than the inconsistent terrain of the beach, and that coupled with the fact that the light was fading fast beneath and an overcast sky which hampered her progress further.

She did have the lights of the Pier to aim at and the light from her phone offered her some form of illumination, but she was still going to be very late, and then the phone rang.

“Hello”

“Where are you?” Kay asked

“I’m coming as fast as I can” Rachel replied

“Yes but where are you? We’re looking down the prom and there’s no sign of you” Kay said

“I’m on the beach”

“What are you doing on the beach?” Kay asked incredulously

“I thought it would be quicker” Rachel retorted

“How’s that working out for you?” Kay asked

“Shut up” Rachel snapped “I’m nearly there”

 

Kay, Peter and Paul were waiting at the Pier entrance but after finding out she was crossing the beach they went to the top of the steps that led down to the sand and after a few minutes an anxious Peter said

“I’ll go down and see if I can spot her”

And after a few minutes Kay and Paul started to descend as well.

“Can you see her yet” Kay shouted but Peter didn’t respond as he had wandered out of view.

 

Rachel’s eyes had become accustomed to the gloom and she was making steady progress as the sand beneath her feet was of a firmer nature as she got closer to the seawall.

As she passed under the Pier she was within easy reach of her destination but then she collided with something or someone in the darkness and she was knocked backwards against one of the supports but rebounded and fell against the figure in the dark.

“Excellent” she thought to herself as gravity took control of her, first the burglar alarm, then the shortcut followed by a mugging.

She finished up straddling the prone figure of her assailant, fortunately she still had her phone in hand so she shone it in the face of the mugger and was surprised to see, illuminated in the eerie blue light, the handsome face of Peter Cooper and not for the first time that evening she took decisive action and kissed him, and with that vigorous and passionate kiss all the frustrations of the previous ten days were released.

Rachel and Peter were so engrossed in the long hoped for kiss that they didn’t notice Kay arriving to witness the action.

Kay retraced her steps where Paul was waiting

“Could you see them?” he asked

“Oh yes”

“And are they together?” he enquired

“Definitely”

“So they’re ok?” Paul asked

“I would say so” she replied

“So what’s keeping them?” Paul asked naively

“Erm, they’re busy” Kay replied

“Busy?”

“Oh yes”

“Doing what?” he asked

“What we should be doing” she replied

“I don’t understand”

“They’re snogging!” she snapped

“Oh” he exclaimed “I see, well yes I think we should very definitely be doing that”

“At last” she said as he took her in his arms.

 

 

 

 

LOVES METAPHOR REVISITED

 

Not even the angels above

Could make a better match

So please be with me

And I will make you happy

Such is the depth and breadth

Of my lasting love

Intense and profound

Broader than the horizon

And the measure of an ocean deep

Enduring till that watery abyss

Dries to sun baked desert

And its powdery form runs

Through your fingers

And loves metaphor is blown away

Like smoke on the wind