I found myself stranded in a strange town
With
less than a week to go before Christmas
Stranded
two hundred miles from home
With
a seriously ill car in the garage
And
a lack of will to contemplate train travel
In
truth I was in no hurry to return home
To
the empty soulless house that once was home
But
now held no comfort for me
My
wife of twenty five years had died a year before
Finally
loosing her battle with cancer
And
my children were all grown up now
With
homes and families of their own
The
house would be full at Christmas
Full
of noise and hustle and bustle,
And
the usual mix of love, laughter and tears
But
for now it was cold and empty
So
I booked into a hotel for the weekend
And
I would drive home on Monday
So
finding myself in a strange town
Just
a few days before Christmas
And
with more than a little time to kill
I
decided I could fill part of my day
By
doing some last minute Christmas shopping
As
I stepped out of the Hotel I shivered
The
day was cold, grey and damp
And
clouds scudded across the December sky
It
was the kind of day that chilled you to the bone
I
made my way towards the high street
It
was only a five minute walk
The
receptionist assured me with a smile
As
she jotted down some brief directions
In
an effort to warm myself up
I
walked briskly following her directions
Down
the narrow almost Dickensian lanes and ally ways
Passing
picturesque Victorian and Tudor buildings, well mock Tudor
As
I went and it was indeed five minutes when I emerged
Onto
the busy cobbled pedestrianized high street
It
was a curious mixture of ancient and modern
At
one end of the street a Norman church was visible
And
at the other was what appeared to be a municipal building
With
rather pretentious Georgian columns
There
was still evidence of a row of Edwardian shop fronts
But
much of the street was modern
With
a little too much sixties influence to be easy on the eye
The
street was crisscrossed along the full length
With
festive lights and decorations
Which
did there best to brighten the scene
I
decided to familiarize my self with what the town had to offer
In
the way of shops so I turned left and joined the throng of shoppers
Faces
gloomy to match the weather
And
headed towards the Georgian pillared building
This
turned out to be the public library
As
I dodged between the Christmas Lemmings
I
made a mental note of shops I would return to
My
progress was hampered by erratic shoppers
Who
moved it appeared independently to any logic
Some
seemed to zigzag everywhere and very few possessed
The
ability to walk in a straight line for more than a few paces
And
others would take a few steps then stop for no apparent reason
Then
after a few moments pause carry on normally in the same direction
The
sound of cheery Christmas songs and carols
Could
be heard from every shop I passed
Though
the cheeriness of the music
Was
clearly not reflected on the faces
Of
the shoppers going in and out of them
As
I passed one shop Noddy Holder screamed “it’s Christmas”
Just
in case any of the reluctant shoppers were in any doubt
When
I reached the other end of the high street
Where
the church stood there was a little square
Which
I wasn’t able to see before
In
the centre of which was the war memorial
And
to its left was a magnificent Christmas tree
Covered
in baubles and adorned by a beautiful angel
Assembled
around the tree was the Salvation Army band
I
took a few moments to admire the tree and listen to the band
And
I was taken back to a distant time and place
The
clock chimed and I was brought back to the present
I
took a few more moments while I decided on my first port of call
Not
realizing just how important a decision it was
I
decided on Woolworths, always a favorite of mine at Christmas
But
it also happened to be the closest
So
I walked towards the store and pushed open the door
As
I entered I paused to hold the door open for a woman coming the other way
I
waited as she put her purse away into a huge handbag
And
I wondered what I would get for my trouble
I
had found the older I got the less women appreciated courtesy
The
simple act of holding open a door could provoke a range of responses
A
smile, a thank you, a nod, a sneer, a tut or a colorful mouth full of abuse
And
you couldn’t always tell who was going to do what
When
she had finished fiddling and securing her bag
She
moved to step through the open door
As
she passed me she looked up said “Thank you” and smiled broadly
And
then she stopped as I returned her smile and then I just stood there
Both
of us stood motionless as slowly the recognition set in
We
both stood there dumbstruck not believing our eyes
I’m
not sure how long for but long enough for a queue to form behind each of us
We
both blushed and excused ourselves
And
stepped out onto the street away from the door
Neither
of us knew what to say I couldn’t believe it was Linda
Who
I last saw 30 years before being driven off in a taxi
Disappearing
off through the snow
With
her palm pressed against the glass her neck craned to keep sight of me
And
here she stood before me as beautiful as ever she was
The
soft curls of her brown hair still danced on her shoulders
Yet
with fine strands of silver threaded thru it
Her
smile was still able to melt my heart even after all those years
Her
smiling eyes still had the same sparkle
The
years had been kind to her and too me much less so
I
was still fumbling for the words to say as I studied her
When
she reached up and hugged my neck
Kissing
my cheek at the same time
And
spoke softly in my ear “Paul, Is it really you?”
I
simply said yes and we stood in that long comfortable embrace
I
don’t know how long we stood there not wanting to let go
Then
as she relaxed her grip and I kissed her forehead
“It’s
so good too see you” I said feebly
She
put her head on my chest, squeezed me and sighed
Then
released her grip and pulled away slightly
And
put her hand up to my cheek and caressed my grey beard
“Do
you have time for coffee”? She said almost pleadingly
I
said of course and she put her arm through mine and led me across the high
street
Asking
quick fire questions as we went
And
I explained about my car breaking down
And
that I was staying at the Cromwell hotel
She
said “oh really” and “oh dear” delighting in my misfortune
We
sat on a large comfortable sofa in Starbucks
And
told the tales of our lives spent apart
Throughout
I looked at her with adoring eyes
Pinching
myself expecting to awake from a dream
As
I had done so very may times before
I
told her about my wife and children
She
told me of her marriage and subsequent divorce
The
good man I gave her up for turned out to be a violent drunk
She
had no children which although unsaid was clearly a regret
With
the aid of several cups of coffee we managed to talk away the entire morning
I
suggested we might spend the day together
And
have dinner together at the hotel
She
accepted the invitation to dinner with a delightful smile
Then
she looked at her watch and suddenly jumped up
“Look
at the time, I have to go” she flustered
She
said she had a prior commitment
“Lunch
with mum” she said rather unconvincingly
She
said it was something she couldn’t get out of
As
I helped her back into her coat the smell of her hair
Evoked
memories of our past embraces
She
fished out her mobile phone as we left the coffee shop
From
her huge handbag and we exchanged phone numbers
And
we firmed up the details for the evening
Then
with a hug and a kiss she was off
I
stood and watched her walk away her coat tails swishing behind her
She
stopped briefly and turned to give me a smile and a wave
Then
with the phone to her ear she hurried off again talking animatedly
I
stood watching until she disappeared from sight
Then
I went back to my Christmas shopping
And
treated myself to a new shirt for the evening
I
bought the gifts I was looking for and paper, tags, cards etc
And
with all my shopping complete I returned to the hotel for lunch
The
rest of the day seemed intolerably long
In
an effort to kill some time I went for a swim
Used
the gym, went for a walk
I
got a haircut even though I didn’t need one
I
even wrapped the Christmas presents I had bought
But
the time passed so interminably slowly
I
walked into the hotel bar at 7 o’clock an hour early
Partly
for some Dutch courage and in part because I had run out of things to do
I
ordered a drink and then sat at the bar
Even
though I wasn’t expecting her until eight
Every
time the door opened I turned to look for her
And
when it wasn’t her self doubt crept in
And
with every false alarm the doubts got worse
What
if she doesn’t come?
What
if she changed her mind?
What
if she never intended to come?
What
if? What if? What if?
Then
at a quarter to the hour the door opened and there she was
There
she stood wearing a simple black knee length dress
Black
tights or stockings and four-inch stiletto shoes
Her
legs as shapely as I remembered them
And
in one hand she held a black leather clutch bag
Her
face looked a little anxious until I stood up
And
then it lit up in the most radiant smile
Then
she walked towards me
Almost
tottering on her heels and she laughed
I
took her hand as she climbed onto a stool
And
kissed her cheek the fragrance of her perfume was intoxicating
Going
straight to my head like a strong spirit
The
combination of her scent and my desire for her almost made me swoon
I
ordered her a drink and we nervously made small talk
Like
two strangers on a blind date
Until
the waitress led us through to the restaurant
Once
we were seated at our table
I
asked her how her lunch with mum went
And
she blushed the deepest red
She
told me the lunch date was a little white lie
Because
she needed the afternoon to get ready
And
the animated phone call was to her sister
To
rally the troops to get her presentable
We
both laughed and any awkwardness was gone
We
talked with such an easy familiarity
As
if her departing taxi had only been a week ago
By
the time we had finished our coffee the restaurant was empty
Except
for us and a weary waitress waiting to clear our table
The
evening seemed to have passed in the blink of an eye
And
had all too soon come to an end
We
got up and made our apologies
Linda
went through the door to the ladies and I settled the bill
I
said good night and had made my apologies again
Then
went in search of Linda through the same door she had used
I
found her standing by the Christmas tree
She
had retrieved her coat and scarf from the cloakroom
Which
were draped over one arm her bag was in her hand
Linda
stood with her back to me gazing out of the window
She
could see my reflection in the glass and smiled
I
gasped at the beauty of her and pinched myself again
I
wanted to kiss her so much but I was afraid
Afraid
to break the magic of that special kiss
That
perfect moment when we kissed in the snow
All
those years ago when I let her slip from my grasp
For
30 years I had revered that moment
Relived
it whenever I felt a snowflake on my skin
Or
stood in a taxi queue on a winters night
Or
when I hear the Salvation Army play
Or
when the snow falls during Christmas time
For
30 years I had wanted to be back there holding her in the snow
And
here I stood a few steps away and I was hesitant
As
if sensing my turmoil she turned away from the window
And
I took those few steps to face her
We
stood for a few moments just looking at each other
Then
she smiled her most heart melting smile
As
she caressed my cheek then she pulled me to her
And
kissed me gently on the lips, a tender and sensitive kiss
When
our lips met electricity ran down my spine
And
it was as if we were young again
Our
lips parted for a second then met again
And
her kiss became more intense, more passionate
Her
coat, scarf and bag fell to the floor as our arms enveloped each other
We
stood locked in our passionate embrace as the tree lights twinkled
Then
she pulled away for a moment before burying her face in my neck
And
spoke softly in my ear “you see that was as good as the first time”
How
could I have doubted it would not be perfect?
I
slid my fingers beneath her hair caressing her nape
And
gently turned her head so I could kiss her sweet lips again
This
time when we disengaged she put her head on my chest
Still
holding on to me so tightly
I
kissed the top of her head and smelled her hair
I
didn’t want to let her go, and then I said “please stay”
“I
can’t watch you disappear from my life in another taxi”
She
lifted her head and looked at me and said
“I’m
not letting you go again, not now not ever”
Then
she smiled at me coyly and blushed like a virgin
And
buried her face in my chest again
Then
she scooped up her coat, scarf and bag from the floor
Took
my hand and we walked in silence to my room
Outside
the room she looked into my eyes and kissed my mouth
Then
I opened the door and let her walk inside
She
dropped her coat and bag onto a chair and turned to face me
Reached
up and wrapped her arms around my neck
And
whispered in my ear “I never stopped loving you”
My
arms enfolded her and pulled her to me tightly
Then
we kissed at first soft and tender then more urgently
And
I began to un-wrap my most special Christmas gift
Wrapped
in lace and silk instead of paper and ribbon
Caressing
her body from neck to Lacy stocking top
And
our love was at last made absolute
When
our act of love was complete, and our dreams realized
We
lay holding each other in the afterglow
Silently
content until we drifted off to sleep
I
awoke to find her stood silhouetted against the window
Gazing
out wearing my shirt to cover her nakedness
She
turned her head to me and said “it’s snowing”
I
slipped out of bed joined her at the window
Standing
behind her and enveloping her in my arms
We
watched as the snow settled on the courtyard
She
hugged my arms and said “How perfect is that”?
Both
of us thinking back to the last time we enjoyed the snowfall together
We
stood for a few minutes taking in the snowy scene
Then
she inclined her head so I could kiss her
When
my hands moved from her soft belly and cupped her breasts
She
led me back to the bed and we made love again
I
woke early and lay in the half light and held Linda’s sleeping form in my arms
As
I lay there I thought how good the fates had been to us
If
my car hadn’t broken down, and had I not rejected the idea of taking the train
I
would not have been shopping on that cold grey morning
I
thought about the moments I spent admiring that tree in the square
And
listening to the Salvation Army band
And
what thought processes made me do what I did
Was
it destiny that I chose Woolworths at that very moment or just blind luck?
All
I knew was that 24 hours before my life had been so empty
And
now it was full and I was finally with my soul mate
Linda
was in my life at last and I wanted her never to leave it again
But
if fate decreed that this one special night
Was
all we could have I would have to be content
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