Mornington-By-Mere – (05) Old Dogs and New Tricks

Cynthia Sharp was the Headmistress of The Mornington School, where she had taught for the whole of her professional life.

She lived and worked in Mornington-By-Mere, a small country village lying in the Finchbottom Vale nestled between the Ancient Dancingdean Forest and the rolling Pepperstock Hills.

Mornington is a quaint picturesque village, a proper chocolate box picturesque idyll, with a Manor House, 12th Century Church, a Coaching Inn, Windmills, an Old Forge, a Schoolhouse, a River and a Mere. 

Cynthia began at the school, fresh out of Winchester Teacher Training College and slowly made herself indispensable.

Until, when she was 35, she was offered the Head Mistress position at the school and then all of a sudden twenty years had passed by.

Although she hadn’t always been so, she had grown to be the archetypal village spinster, seen about Mornington in tweeds and stout shoes.

Some people in the village found her unapproachable, which wasn’t the case, but it suited her to have them think it, it made it easier to keep them at arm’s length.

She lived alone in Wood View Cottage situated in Bridge Street opposite School Wood and had done for 30 years, before that she rented a room at Windmill Farm.

Cynthia was small in stature but large in presence and her finely chiseled features and bird like eyes, keenly honed senses had earned her the nickname of Miss Marple.

She loved the children though, all her children, it was just when they grew up that she distanced herself from them.

It wasn’t that she found it difficult to form attachments she just didn’t have the will for it.

Apart from her dogs, she had had three over the years, all Heinz varieties, all unique, all special.

The last one, Harry, had died the previous year, but she hadn’t replaced him, and she wasn’t sure if she would this time.

She still walked the woods and the riverbank that she used to walk with the dogs and she supposed she did miss the company.

The head of the Mornington Estate was the resident of the Manor, which was the family seat of the guardians of the estate, namely the St George family, the head of which was Baron Gabriel St George, who lived at manor with his four sisters and his widowed aunt Philomena.

The St George family had been landowners in Downshire since the Norman Conquests and at one time their lands covered the whole of the Finchbottom Vale.

Cynthia had a rather ornate gate in her garden which was specially commissioned and presented to her by Baron St George in recognition of 40 years’ service at the village school.

And as lovely as it was it had become the Bain of her life because people kept leaving it open, especially the postman, which drove her crazy. 

She would stand in her kitchen looking out and she would see it and then she would have to go and close it immediately.

On one Saturday afternoon in September Cynthia stood at her kitchen sink and cursed. 

“That dammed man has left the gate open again”

So she put on her outdoor shoes and trudged down the path but when she reached the gate she found it was prevented from closing because there was the bloodied body of an injured terrier slumped against it.

“What’s happened to you?” she said gently

She glanced around and about but the village was deserted, and then she remembered there was a big wedding on that afternoon at St Winifred’s, she had been invited but she didn’t like churches as she was still angry with God for a past misdemeanor.

She only ever attended church if it was in connection with a school event such as the Carol service, Easter Parade or Remembrance Day or of course funerals, which she seemed to attend more and more often with each passing year.

She would however attend the reception at the village hall that evening.

“Well it looks like it’s down to me” she said 

So with no one around to help she went and got the picnic rug from the house and wrapping it around the dog she scooped it up into her arms and it whimpered.

“Its ok” she said quietly “let’s get you to the vet” 

It wasn’t far to the vets as the crow flies, Jeffrey and Teague’s were only in The Street, so she turned left from her gate and then left again into The Close and at the far end there was an alleyway that led to The Street.

If there wasn’t anyone in the vet’s surgery she would just have to call the emergency number.

Mornington was a rural community with a lot of livestock so she was confident there would be a vet somewhere in the vicinity.

She reached the vets and as luck would have it the lights were on.

Cynthia used her elbow to press the bell and for good measure she kicked the bottom of the door a few times with her stout shoes.

When she got no response however she repeated the bell and the boot procedure once more.

She was about to do it a third time when the door opened and a mature man in a smart suit said.

“I’m sorry I was getting changed for the wedding and when you rang the first time so I had to put my trousers on before I could answer the door”

“Well it’s not as if I’ve never seen you naked before Mr. Teague” she said

“Really when was that?”

“1973”

“1973?” he repeated

“I’ll explain later” she said “First things first”

As she took the dog into reception Ian Teague said

“Bring it this way” and led the way into the surgery, 

Once on the table he checked it over

“What his name?” he asked

“I don’t know he’s not my dog, I don’t know who the owner is” she replied

“Well there’s no collar” he paused to wave a wand over the dog “And he’s not chipped”

After examining the patient he said

“Well the poor fellows been hit by a car”

“And?” she asked

“I need to operate”

“Well do so” she said

“I can’t do that” he replied

“Well the owner may not want to bear the expense”

“Well hang that I’ll take the expense” she said “And if you can’t find the owner I’ll take him”

“Ok then” he said “So I’ll need your name” 

“You mean you don’t remember me” she said and laughed

“I would have thought you’d remember the names of women you’ve proposed to”

Ian just looked blankly at her 

“18th birthday party at Mark Church’s house 1976”

Still he looked blank

“There are some huge holes in your memory” she said “Cynthia Sharp”

Still no spark of recognition

“Just right the name down and I’ll…” she began

“Explain later” he continued

“Exactly” she said

The Jeffrey and Teague Veterinary Practice had been fulfilling the Veterinary needs of the Finchbottom Vale inhabitants since God was a boy and it was still going strong.

Of the two senior partners, Robin Jeffrey was now retired and living in Dulcet’s Mill, one of the three remaining Mornington Windmills.

The 64 year old widow whose children were all living independent lives chose the solitary existence where he could spend his time enjoying the two thing that gave him the most pleasure, birdwatching, which he could do from his vantage point in the top of the mill and fishing which he could do in the River Brooke which ran no more than twenty yards from his front door.

The younger partner was 58 year old Ian Teague, when the last of his children left home his wife’s response to empty nest syndrome was to empty it further by divorcing him.

The moment the children were grown up and off on their own she couldn’t get him out the house quick enough.

He was never quite sure if it was the smell of the animals she didn’t like or just him.

Although deep down he knew the reason.

This event occurred with very serendipitous timing for Ian because after Robin retired he felt very much the old man of the practice, the offspring were all practicing and he felt increasingly in the way, but he wasn’t ready to hang up his boots entirely so he choose to semi retire.

As a result he based himself at the Mornington Surgery at a time when the Mornington Estate had exercised its option to purchase Mornington Field back from the MOD and along with it they also acquired all the buildings and infrastructure on the airfield itself as well as 29 houses in the village formally used as quarters for military personnel.

In order to optimize the newly acquired assets the team on the Estate, led by Ray Walker worked tirelessly and had eight houses ready for occupation by the 6th of July.

This was the day before Ian’s wife threw a wobbly and announced she wanted a divorce.

So after a call to Lyndon-Sanders Properties of Shallowfield he found out that priority was to be given to local people or people with ties to the area or those who worked in some capacity for the estate such as agriculture or the brewery so as he was the vet working out of the Mornington Practice he managed to secure the keys to number 6, Military Row.

Jeffrey and Teague had Surgery’s all over the Vale and beyond as well as a veterinary Hospital in Shallowfield

The Dog was quite badly injured and couldn’t be dealt with in Mornington so Ian Teague made two quick phone calls one was to Hayley Gwilym who he knew was on duty at the Hospital in Shallowfield to warn her he was coming in and the second was to a local girl Lindsay Cooper who was his Veterinary nurse.

Cynthia remained with the injured animal while Ian went into the office to change back out of his suit

And after a few minutes Lindsay Cooper appeared at the door dressed in her finery including a rather stunning hat.

“You must be the best dressed vets in Downshire” she said as Lindsay stepped inside

“Hello Miss sharp” she said

“You don’t have to call me Miss now” she replied “I’m not your teacher anymore”

Just then Ian reappeared in more appropriate clothing and Lindsay went off to get out of her posh frock.

While Lindsay changed into her clinical scrubs Ian went and got the car and parked out front of the surgery and he then picked up the sedated dog and loaded him into the car and Lindsay got in the back with the injured terrier. 

“I’ll call you later Miss Sharp” Ian said as he got back behind the wheel

“I’m still intrigued to know where you saw me naked”

He added as he drove off

“Did you say she saw you naked?” Lindsay asked

“Apparently so” he replied “And I once proposed to her”

“Were the two things connected?” Lindsay asked

“I have no idea” he replied

Cynthia stood on the pavement and smiled as the car drove off and then she walked back up the alleyway and went home. 

The Mornington School catered for students from years 1 to 13 which they had managed quite successfully with just four teaching staff and some imaginative use of technological teaching aids and live video links to Finchbottom Grammar School, but with the Military Row properties gradually being let out they were starting to see an increase in numbers, so she had employed another two teachers who would be starting on the Monday following the party but as they had moved into one of the Military Row houses.

They were invited to the wedding reception which Cynthia thought would serve as an ice breaker whereby Teresa and Mark O’Sullivan would be able to meet her fellow teachers and some of the parents at the same time.

In her long experience there was no greater tool in a teacher’s arsenal than the mental image of a particularly troublesome parent either in a state of disgrace after having imbibed too much wine or making an exhibition of themselves with their dad dancing.

Cynthia enjoyed the village social events and liked to catch up with the local news, the village gossip was always a bit more informative when the teller had been drinking.

People were always more unguarded when they were full of alcohol.

Cynthia was a teetotaler herself so she could just sit back and hoover up the goss.

She had just introduced the O’Sullivan’s to her existing teaching staff, Debbie Dunlop, her deputy, Mark Foreman and newly qualified Amy Hoddinott, and they were standing in a group by the bar when Ian Teague walked in.

He was more formally dressed than he was in his work clothes but much less so than the smart suit he was wearing when she first met him.

“Ian, how is the poor creature?” she asked and the group began to break up.

“Never mind that” Lindsay Cooper said who had followed Ian in

“I want to know when you saw him naked”

And on hearing that the group reassembled and all eyes were on Cynthia.

“Well it was in 1973” she said

“Hang on” Ian interrupted “I was only 16 in 1973 and you’re a lot younger than I am, so what on earth was I doing?”

“Well I’m not that much younger than you” she corrected him “I was 13 at the time”

He tried to cast his mind back to his youth and came up blank. 

“Black Abbotts Island” Cynthia prompted him

At first he shook his head and then the memory popped into his head and the evidence of it spread across his face.

“That was you?” he asked and then he had to explain to the assembled group which had swelled its numbers.

In the summer of seventy-three when "Skweeze me pleeze me” by Slade was top of the pops.

Ian Teague was a Patrol Leader in the 6th Abbeyvale Scout Troup who set off in a beat up white Ford Transit heading for the wilds of Downshire.

They travelled in the back of the transit van and sat on wooden benches, like the forms you get in school gyms.

Not a seatbelt in sight and not even the benches were secured.

No one with half a brain would dream of doing that kind of thing in the 21st century but at the time it seemed quite natural and they didn't think twice about it.

They were camping for two weeks in a farmer’s field on Black Abbotts Island in the Finch estuary close to the town of Sharpington-by-Sea.

It was a time when life for Ian and his motley crew of scouts still held infinite possibilities, Del, the Lawther brothers, Big Pete, Tiny Tears and a host of others whose names had been lost in the mists of his mind.

They were a mixed bunch and they did all the normal scouty type stuff, digging latrines and singing around the camp fire and that kind of thing.

They even had to make their own rudimentary cooker and each patrol took turns to be on kitchen duty, which included cooking and scrubbing the burnt black saucepans.

One bright spark in his patrol, Gus, had the idea that if you mixed washing up liquid and washing powder into a paste and spread it liberally onto the base of the saucepans it made them easier to clean afterwards.

What a load of old tosh that turned out to be, what it actually did was make the job twice as difficult as you had to chisel off the burnt remains of the washing paste as well as the normal blackness.

When they weren’t being all scouty and dib, dib, dibbing, they went off on trips, one of which was to Sharpington-by-Sea.

They all piled into the back of the Transit again and off they went, they were not a very sophisticated bunch of lads so they had a great time by the sea, the Pier, "kiss me quick” hats, amusement arcades and of course the Sharpington Fun Park.

The Fun Park was the first purpose built amusement park to open in Britain, which had an assortment of rides, like the Rotor and the Wild Mouse, The Cyclone and the Morehouse Galloper, all very tame compared to a 21st century roller coaster and suchlike but they loved it.

In exchange for the farmer allowing the scouts to camp in his field, which was of course on an island, they were required to plant rice grass in the mud banks around the island.

The Finch estuary was tidal water and when the tide was out there was just a great expanse of mud between the island and the mainland save for a narrow channel.

Unfortunately for the farmer every time the tide went out it was taking some of his island with it, hence the need for the rice grass.

The idea being that the grass would bind the mud together and therefore prevent the island being slowly taken out to sea.

For their part they had to wade out into the mud at low tide up to their knees and plant the fore mentioned grass.

Of course the only problem with this plan was that when you put a group of under sixteen's up to their knees in mud the inevitable outcome is a mud fight.

At the end of the mud fight they were, without exception, all covered from head to toe in thick black slimy mud, and they thought it was fantastic.

When the task was finished and the rice grass was planted they waded back to shore looking like a group of extras from "swamp thing”.

The scouts then had the problem of getting clean again.

For this they only had two options the first one being to wait for the tide to come back in, by which time the mud would have set or the second option was to use water from the standpipe in the corner of the field by the gate, which was used to water the animals.

This they utilized to great effect taking it in turns to use a bucket filled from the tap and dousing themselves down.

Unfortunately as senior Patrol Leader Ian was the last one to go and after he had removed his trunks he stood tipping buckets of water over his head gradually removing layer by layer of the slimy mud.

However just as he was emptying the final bucket over himself and with his hands still extended above his head he heard the sound of a vehicle and as he turned around to investigate the noise he saw to his horror that it was a minibus, full of Girl Guides driving slowly past the gate, one of whom was 13 year old Cynthia Sharp.

He had no time to cover his embarrassment or anything else for that matter so he did the only thing any self-respecting boy scout could do under the circumstances, which was to drop the bucket and give the scout salute.

“You saluted?” Debbie Dunlop asked through her laughter

“Yes he did” Cynthia confirmed

“How come you recognized me?” he said “you must have a remarkable memory”

“Oh well, you have to remember I was a thirteen year old girl and I had never seen a naked man before, and although you were only 16 you were very definitely a man” she said “I can remember that very clearly”

“In that case I have to admit that I’m surprised you remembered my face” Ian said “You were obviously focused elsewhere”

A lot of laughter followed and a general conversation took over and by that stage the group that had formed had largely dispersed and those who remained settled themselves at a nearby table and Ian got in a round of drinks. 

And when he sat down again Cynthia said

“You know you still haven’t told me how that poor dog is”

“Never mind the bloody dog” Lindsay slurred “Tell us about the proposal”

“What proposal?” Debbie asked

“Ian proposed to Cynthia” Lindsay said

“Really?” Mark Foreman asked  

“Apparently” Ian asked “So when was it?”

“1975” Cynthia replied “Late Summer”

Ian closed his eyes and tried to recall what he was doing 40 years in his past.

“I’ll give you a clue” she said “It was at Mark Church’s house”

“Mark Church?” he said “Oh his brothers 21st”

It was in 1975 shortly before Ian left to go off to University.

He had spent the previous 2 years with his friends Mark and Phil doing a mobile disco, although to be fair they were only mobile due to Phil’s Dad.

They called themselves “Sound Sensation” and did 18th and 21st birthday parties, engagement parties, weddings, and Christmas parties.

Mainly in community centers and church halls, however not exclusively, they had one regular gig at the Kodak social club and on one occasion they did it in a house.

It was a party at Mark’s house for his brothers 21st, it was an unusual set up, the speakers and the light arrays were set up downstairs and the console and music was set up in one of the bedrooms with the cables going out the bedroom window and in through the lounge window below.

As they were set up in the small bedroom there was only room for one person up there at a time so the evening was divided into three and they each did 2 hours each.

Ian took the first stint from 8 till 10 and then Mark took over which was when Ian started drinking.

First beer and then his spirit of choice Vodka however the Vodka didn’t last and so he turned to the Gin, to his Vodka soaked brain this was a perfectly sensible course of action as it was the same colour.

After he had poured his second large gin he sat down and watched his friend Pete, who was six foot 7 dancing with a girl who was 5 foot nothing and the last thing he remembered was wondering how he was going manage with the goodnight kiss.

“Oh he managed quite well” Cynthia said   

“That was you?” Ian asked

“Yes”

He looked at her and he could see her dancing with his friend, of course her Auburn hair was greying now, but yes he could see her.

“But after watching you and Pete dancing I remember absolutely nothing” he said “until I woke up on my bedroom floor the next morning”

“Well that’s convenient” Cynthia said

“Come on then, tell” Lyndsay said

“Well Pete had gone to spend a penny” Cynthia continued “and Ian walked up to me and said that he loved me and that he was going to marry me”

“And then what happened” Debbie demanded

“Well it was time for the champagne toast and they locked Ian in the cupboard because he was drunk” she said

“So I’d never met you before?” Ian asked

“No and of course you didn’t recognize me from the mini bus” 

“But I proposed to you?” Ian queried 

“Yes”

Ian had no knowledge of the proposal or the cupboard or that he fell unconscious in the street after taking two unsteady steps and subsequently had to be carried home by four mates who delivered him, wearing only one shoe and shirtless to his parents’ house. 

“What did Pete say when he came back?” he asked

“Nothing” she said “He didn’t know, you were already in the cupboard”

“That is so embarrassing” He said and took a drink of his orange juice 

“I wonder what became of Peter” he mused “I lost touch with him when I went off to Uni”

“Well he proposed to me” she said “properly, which I accepted”

“Good for him” Ian said

“And then he was killed at Goose Green in 1982” 

“I’m so sorry” Ian said, he had no idea he was her Fiancé or that he was killed in the Falklands.

Cynthia fell silent and then Ian said 

“Did you know Pete was on the Black Abbotts Island trip?”

“No I didn’t” she replied

“I have a lot of photos from those days” he said

“Would like to see them sometime?” he asked

“Very much so” she replied

“Now tell me about the blessed dog” she said and looked towards Lindsay who nodded.

Ian told her that the little West Highland Terrier had survived the surgery and should make a full recovery, miraculously there were no broken bones but some severe lacerations and a hairline fracture of his hip. 

As they didn’t know who the owner was they would keep him at the hospital in Shallowfield until he was completely healed. 

As September eased into October Cynthia found life at the school was the most challenging it had ever been.

With the new teachers, larger classes, new timetables and new pupils arriving almost daily, and a lesser mortal might well have been driven to drink but she was made of sterner stuff and with her predisposition, alcohol wasn’t an option for her.

So she took deep breaths and pressed on regardless.  

In her quiet moments her thought turned to the night of the wedding reception and how much fun it was and how as a result she had become something of a cause célèbre in the village since word from the reception, thanks to Chinese whispers, painted her in a very exotic light. 

In fact she was not so much of a Miss Marple and more of a Miss Whiplash.

Ian Teague, considering he was semi-retired was rushed off his feet in October due to a staff shortage which was caused by an outbreak of the norovirus in Shallowfield, subsequently it wasn’t until November 1st that he walked the fully recovered white West Highland Terrier through the front gate of Wood View Cottage.

The dog got very excited the moment they got close to the cottage.

“Alright fella” Ian said and knocked on the door.

Cynthia had finished her housework for the day and had just sat down in her armchair with a freshly made cup of coffee and was listening to Classic FM when she heard the knock.

“Nuts” she said and put her mug down and muttered under her breath all the way to the door and was about to deliver a sharp riposte the moment the door opened but when she saw the excited terrier fit and well, she softened.

“Well hello you” she said

“He clearly remembers you” Ian said

“Is that right?” Cynthia asked

“Come on in and bring the human with you”

She showed her guests into the lounge and then made a coffee for Ian.

“So he looks well” she said

“Yes he’s fully recovered” Ian said

“What’s his name?” 

“Well we haven’t found the owner so technically he doesn’t have a name” he replied “but the girls have been calling him Westie”

“Why Westie?” she asked

“Because he’s a West Highland Terrier” Ian said with a smile

“Duh” she responded “that’s a perfect name” 

“I’m glad you agree” he said

“So no owner?” Cynthia asked still making a fuss of her new friend

“No” he replied

“Does that mean I can keep him?” she asked

“That’s why we’re here” Ian said

“So he’s mine?” she asked almost as excited as Westie

“Yes he’s all yours, but”

“There’s always a “but”” she said

“But he is desperate for a really good walk” he continued “Which I thought we could do together, I’ve got Colin in the car”

“Who is Colin?”

“He’s my Jack Russell” he replied

“Colin?” she asked and sniggered “I’ll get my coat”

Mornington-By-Mere – (05) Old Dogs and New Tricks (Part 09)

Cynthia and Ian set off through School Wood and then crossed the road bridge to the Mornington Field side of the river and turned east out into the country where they let Westie and Colin off their leads and let them run amuck.

“Why on earth did you call the poor thing Colin?” she asked “It’s what some of my kids would say was a “sucky” name”

“I didn’t, that was his name when I got him” he replied “He belonged to an elderly lady in Dulcets Green and when she died last Winter Sgt Jones brought him into me”

“And you kept him?” 

“Yes, he has such a lovely nature and I fell in love with him” he replied

“So not such a sucky name after all then” she said

It was quite late when they got back to the village and the sun was beginning to set.

“Well I don’t know about Westie but I’m exhausted” Cynthia said

“Me too” he agreed “and I’m famished”

“Do you fancy a curry?” she asked “The Bengal in Shallowfield deliver”

“What all the way out here?” he said

“Yes” 

“In that case count me in”

At Wood View Cottage with the dogs asleep on the rug and the curry consumed, the human sat and quietly reflected on a day well spent and it was Cynthia who finally broke the silence

“Did you ever find those photos?”

“No not yet” he said

“Oh” she exclaimed, failing to hide her disappointment

“When I split with my wife she wanted me and everything to do with me out of the house ASAP, so I put all my worldly goods into storage”

“I see”

“Now I’m slowly bringing everything over a few boxes at a time but the contents of my study are right at the back” he explained

“In another month or so I should have unearthed them”

She couldn’t pretend she wasn’t disappointed but at least there was a viable reason, it wasn’t just that he’d forgotten.

That weekend walk was the first of many for the four of them that November and they continued into December and it was at the beginning of December that Ian surprised Cynthia one cold winter’s night and when she opened the door he said

“I have them Cynthia”

“Well I’m sure they can be cured” she replied

“No it’s not an ailment” he said with a chuckle “I have the photos”

“Fantastic” she responded excitedly “Come on in”

Cynthia made a drink and then they sat on the sofa in the lounge and started looking through the albums, and when she turned another page she said.

“There he is” and she sighed “God he was a lovely boy”

“Thank you Ian” she said when she had closed the last album and wiped away a tear.

“You’re welcome Cynthia” he replied and handed her his hankie

“I can have copies made”

“Call me Impy” she said

“Call you what?” 

“Impy” she repeated

“Where does that come from?”

“It’s a family name” she replied “when I was a girl, about the time I saw you naked, my little cousin couldn’t say Cynthia instead it came out as Impy” 

“Ok Impy it is” 

Two weeks after they had viewed the albums together Ian called round to see her and he found her in a terrible state of agitation.

“What on earth is the matter” he asked

“It’s the Carol Service” she said

“What about the Carol Service?”

“They want me to do a reading” she replied

“Well you’re used to speaking in front of people” he said “it’s not as if you’re the shy retiring type”

“It’s a bible reading” she said

“And?”

“I don’t do God” she said “because of what God did to me, taking Pete away from me so cruelly”

“You can’t blame God for the acts of men” he said

“But it ruined my life” Impy responded

“The War almost ruined your life, but you survived it” Ian pointed out

“In spite of God” she said resolutely

“Well I’ve always been of the opinion that he never gives us more to deal with than we can handle”

“I don’t need empty platitudes” she said through the tears

“What do you need?” 

“I need you to be there with me, in church” she said

“I can’t” he said “I have a meeting”

“What with a client or colleagues?”

“Neither” he said “It’s not that kind of meeting”

“I don’t understand” She said impatiently

Ian reached into his pocket and brought out what appeared to her to be a coin but it was a token from AA.

“How long?” she asked

“21 years without a drink”

“But you still go to the meetings”

“Yes because I’m still an alcoholic” he said “I just don’t happen to drink, but also I’m a sponsor to people who are at the other end of the road from me”

“I understand” she said

“It was the drink that soured my marriage because when the children were little I was never there for the family” he confessed

“She always said that she would only stay with me as long as a home was needed for the children, so as soon as the last one left I had to go, 21 years sober didn’t make up for the years I was a drunk”

“For me it’s been 32 years” she said

“I didn’t know” he said surprised “I thought not drinking was just a lifestyle choice for you” 

“It’s not a choice it’s a necessity” Cynthia said “and I’ve never told another living soul that”

Ian nodded he understood the secrecy, Cynthia sat down heavily in her chair and took a deep breath and continued

“I didn’t go to AA like you, but I did hit rock bottom”

“We all do” he said

“I was drinking with my best friend Brenda, we were on one of our benders and we were so drunk”

She smiled wryly at the memory but then her countenance darkened

“Then Brenda passed out and lay on the floor choking on her own vomit and I was so pissed I couldn’t help her, I sat in the corner in a drunken stupor and watched her die because I was so wasted I couldn’t even crawl across the room to save my best friends life, and from that day on I haven’t touched a drop”

At that point she completely broke down and sobbed.

Ian took hold of her as she cried in great gasping sobs for more than ten minutes until she went silent.

“It’s time to lay the guilt aside now” he said referring to the guilt of living when the love of her life had died and then the compounded guilt of watching her friend die, powerless to prevent it, through her alcoholism.

“I can’t” she said

“You must”

Ian held her in his arms for the best part of an hour while she cried her tears, and beyond until she tried to kiss him, but he pulled away and said.

“Now is not the time”

“I don’t understand” she said

“You want me for the wrong reason” 

“But I really like you” she said and tried to kiss him again

“But you still love Pete, and that’s the problem”

He said “I can’t compete with the memory of a dead man”

“You don’t have too”

“I do, until you can tell me you love me, as I love you” he said and walked towards the door

“Please don’t go” she begged

“Can you say it?” he asked but she just looked towards the floor in silence

“Then I have to go”

Ian went home and got Colin and took him out for a long walk in the rain which Colin didn’t enjoy any more than Ian did.

Cynthia meanwhile was crying again with only Westie to comfort her and when she went to bed she tossed and turned all night.

Ian on the other hand was spared a night of troubled sleep when he was called out to a colicky horse in Pangmere. 

On the night of the Carol service, Cynthia nervously walked along the nave and up onto the dais before gingerly climbing the steps up to the pulpit.

Her heart was pounding and her mouth was dry and she thought she was going to faint until she caught sight of Ian standing in the transept.

And when he smiled her heart stopped pounding and her mouth was no longer dry and she no longer felt as if she would faint. 

And with renewed strength she listed her head high and in a clear and steady voice she read a passage from Luke’s Gospel  

“But the angel said to her, “Do not be afraid, Mary, you have found favour with God.

You will be with child and give birth to a son, and you are to give him the name Jesus.

He will be great and will be called the Son of the Most High.

The Lord God will give him the throne of his father David, and he will reign over the house of Jacob forever; his kingdom will never end”

“How will this be” Mary asked the angel, “Since I am a virgin?” 

The angel answered, “The Holy Spirit will come upon you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you. So the holy one to be born will be called the Son of God” 

When she had concluded the reading she walked down the helter-skelter steps from the pulpit and when she reached a point where she was looking directly at Ian she smiled at him and then mouthed the words “I love you”