John Whittaker and his
wife Kathy were getting divorced and as a result he moved out of the marital
home.
His departure however
wasn’t due to any acrimony between them, it was just that he had no particular
emotional link to the place, whereas she really loved the house so he had
agreed to let her buy his half and as soon as she sorted out the mortgage he
bought himself a flat.
John and Kathy had no
children so it was a fairly simple process to separate themselves and they
managed to keep the involvement of the blood sucking lawyers in the process to
an absolute minimum.
It was a very amicable
split with no animosity or hatred, or lack of love for that matter.
There just wasn’t
enough of that special ingredient that turned love in to breathless, heart
skipping passion.
They still loved each
other very much but only as friends.
While he was waiting for
the money to come through from his half of the house he moved into a caravan up
at the Whitecliff Hill Caravan Park overlooking Sharpington.
John Whittaker had
lived in the town all his life and he loved everything about the traditional
seaside resort of Sharpington-by-Sea, with its Victorian Pier, seafront hotels,
crazy golf, The Palladium ballroom, the well maintained gardens, a pristine
promenade, theatre and illuminations, plus all the usual things to have a great
time by the seaside, as well as amusement arcades and of course the Sharpington
Fun Park.
The Sharpington Fun
Park was the first purpose built amusement park to open in Britain, which was a
proud boast for the locals.
The Fun Park had an
assortment of rides, like the Rotor and the Wild Mouse, The Cyclone and the
Morehouse Galloper, all very tame compared to a 21st century roller coaster but
it was still fun and still popular with visitors and locals a like.
Apart from being a fun
place for the many tourists to visit and great place to live for him,
Sharpington was also a popular place for retirees and boasted a number of
static caravan parks so a short term let in a caravan was ideal to keep him in
Sharpington until he bought his flat and it wasn’t difficult to find a vacant
caravan in February.
However by the end of
the third month up at Whitecliff Hill the money had finally come through from
Kathy and he was able to start looking for a flat and as it turned out it was
perfect timing as he managed to find a flat in Jubilee Court that had just come
on the market.
It was perfectly
situated and gave him a view of Jubilee Park as well as a sea view and was
close to the seafront.
It was a slightly run
down flat but it had everything he required though and it just needed a little
TLC which he thought would give him the opportunity to stamp his mark on the
place, he could just take his time because he intended to be there for a long
time.
It wasn’t just a stop
gap, he was in for the long haul, so a little bit of DIY didn’t bother him.
He moved in to flat
43, Jubilee Court, on May the 1st and he loved the flat from moment one,
despite its initial dinginess, it was on the top floor so it offered
spectacular views of the town, the other advantage being that there was no
noise from above and in addition there were two flats between him and the lifts
and so he just had the one immediate neighbour.
The fourth floor flat,
next door to John Whittaker, was occupied by the quietest neighbour he had ever
known.
In fact he had been
living there for three weeks before he even realised the flat next door was
occupied and the only reason he discovered that it was, was because of an
obnoxious delivery man, and he was at home a lot because he was a freelance AutoCAD
designer and worked from home more often than not.
On Monday John had
been out for a walk along the promenade as far as Hemmings Post Office and
General Store where he stocked up on provisions, it wasn’t the nearest shop to
Jubilee Court but as he was passing he thought why not.
He had just returned
to Jubilee Court, or more precisely had just emerged from the lift on the
fourth floor and discovered a sweaty heavily tattooed man arguing with a small
red haired woman in her late 20s, separated by what appeared to be a brand new
fridge freezer, which was so positioned that she had to peer around it to see
her adversary.
“It says on the docket
“doorstep delivery”” he said aggressively
“And this is the
doorstep”
“But I can’t get it
inside the flat on my own” she pointed out
“Doorstep delivery
means Doorstep Delivery” he repeated
“Please” she begged
“Look sweetheart,
you’re lucky I bought it this far” he snapped
“Now are you going to
sign for it or not?”
“Do I have a choice?”
she said snatching his PDA from his hand and scribbling a signature on the
screen.
He then snatched it
back and hurriedly turned away.
John had to quickly
step aside to avoid being trampled underfoot by the sweaty geezer and his
trolley.
But after the lift
doors closed he asked
“Do you need a hand?”
“Pardon me?” she said
“Would you like a hand
getting it inside?” he said nodding towards the fridge freezer.
“Oh” she exclaimed in
surprise “yes that would be very kind, thank you”
He deposited his
shopping on his own doorstep then went back to his neighbour and began
manhandling the fridge freezer into her kitchen and then he helped her unpack
it.
“I’m John by the way”
he said “John Whitaker, I live next door”
“Faye Harry, I live
here” she replied and laughed
When they had finished
in the kitchen she put the kettle on while he disposed of all the packaging, it
took him a couple of trips in the lift but when he returned Faye had made him a
coffee and then they sat in her lounge to drink it.
John returned from the
bin store to find Faye had made him a coffee so they sat in her lounge to drink
it.
And as they sat on the
sofa he said
“I haven’t seen you
out and about”
“That’s because I
don’t” Faye replied
“You don’t what?” John
asked a little confused
“Go out” she said
“I don’t understand”
he said
“I don’t leave the
flat” she confirmed
“What never?”
“No never” she
confirmed
“Agoraphobia?” John
asked her
“Yes” she replied
enthusiastically, and her face lit up with delight because someone actually
knew what was wrong with her.
“How long?” he asked
“What? Since I went
out?” Faye asked
“Yes”
“Three years” she said
“Three years?” he
repeated in disbelief
“Why?”
“Lots of reasons
really” Faye said quietly and John just sat and waited for her to elaborate.
“I’m just scared I
suppose” she said, “It’s very scary out there”
“Well if you can’t go
out on your own why couldn’t you go out with someone?” he suggested “A family
member or a friend”
“I have no one now”
she replied sadly
“No family?” he asked
“No”
“Husband? Boyfriend?”
he added
“No”
“Girlfriend then?” he
ventured
“No” she said very
definitely
“Ok, sorry, but you
must have friends” he said
“Well I used to, but
now they’re all gone, one by one they stopped coming to see me or answering the
phone” she said sadly “avoiding the nutter clearly”
“Then they weren’t
real friends in the first place” he offered
“I suppose not” she
responded
There was a brief
silence and then he asked
“How do you manage
financially?”
“Well the flat was
left to me by my gran, and I have an annuity from my parent’s estate, plus a
small income from shares and investments, plus I earn a little money, proof
reading”
He nodded in response
and Faye added
“It’s only a modest
income but I’m not an extravagant person”
“What about shopping?”
he asked
“Home delivery” Faye
replied “And they don’t mind bringing it inside”
“What about the things
that can’t be delivered?” John asked
“I have a hairdresser
who comes here to the flat” she said
“What about your
health?”
“Well I have an
exercise bike and a treadmill” she replied “so I work out regularly”
“No I mean your
health, doctors, dentists, hospital visits and such like?” he asked
“Well I attend to
myself” she said “The internet is very informative”
“Yes but you can’t
attend to everything yourself” John pointed out
“What about
prescription medications?”
“You can get anything
on the Internet” Faye replied “Its mind boggling”
“Blimey” he said “you
really need to go outside in the real world”
“Yes but I can’t
though can I” she said and tears welled up in her eyes “I just can’t do it”
“What if I was to help
you?” John suggested
“What do you mean?”
“Well what if I was to
help you go outside again” he said
“You would do that for
me?” she asked wiping away the tears.
When John Whitaker
offered to help a complete stranger to conquer her agoraphobia, it seemed to
him at the time to be the most natural thing in the world to do.
The look of sheer
relief on her face when he offered to help convinced him that it was absolutely
the right thing for him to do.
The problem was that
he had absolutely no idea how to achieve it.
When he returned to
his flat he spent the rest of the day surfing the net, reading up on the
subject and he read other people’s personal accounts of how they beat
agoraphobia and finished his research at 2am, but at the end of it he had a
plan.
So starting the next
day, and continuing over the following months, he set about helping Faye to
leave her flat.
It wasn’t easy by any
means although it could have been if he’d taken a short cut and just given her
Rohypnol and carried her outside and waited for her to come around on the
beach.
But he decided that if
he did that without her consent it would have been counterproductive so he
decided they had to do it the hard way.
However the truth was
he had no idea where to begin to help her, how to take the first step so to
speak.
“So tell me how it
started?” he asked her on the first morning
“What?” she said
“How did the
agoraphobia start?” he replied and she totally broke down in tears.
“I’m so sorry” he said
as he comforted her “I didn’t mean to upset you”
When the sobs had
finally subsided and she’d dried her eyes she said in a faltering voice
“It wasn’t just one
thing”
“Really?” he pressed
her, sensing that she had lied.
There was a long
silence as she processed his question.
“That’s not actually
true” she confessed “I lost my parents when I was in my third year at
University, which ultimately cost me my degree”
John didn’t respond to
her confession, but instead he let her take her time to continue when she was
ready.
“I stayed in my room
at University for three months”
“But you came out”
John said
“That was Owen” Faye
said
“Owen?” he asked
“Owen Blake” she
replied “my fiancé”
“Oh”
“Well he wasn’t my
fiancé at the time, he was just my boyfriend”
“But he got you out?”
“Yes, Owen told me
that he loved me and that he couldn’t live without me and then he proposed to
me” she said flatly “and so I left the room with him”
“But?” John responded
and Faye looked at him and tears welled up in her eyes again but she swallowed
hard and said
“But, four years
later, a month before our wedding, when he was on the stag weekend, he phoned
me from Amsterdam and said the wedding was off, because he didn’t love me”
“Nice” he said
“No it was worse than
that, because he went on to say he’d never loved me”
“God” John said
“So if there was a
single thing, then that was it” she said and the tears came again.
After Faye’s frank and
honest revelation John was even more determined to help her, so he decided to
contact a doctor, her doctor, or at least the surgery where she was still
registered.
However it took 3
weeks to get one of the overpaid narcissists to do a home visit.
So in the meantime
John sat and drank coffee together every morning and talked about her hopes.
When the Doctor
finally showed up the best he could manage was to offer her a course of
anti-depressants.
“I don’t want
antidepressants” she shouted “I want help”
“I’m offering you
help” the doctor said without looking at her
“No you’re offering me
a chemical cosh” she said “I’m agoraphobic, I need proper help”
“The antidepressants
will help” the Doctor insisted
“I don’t need your
bloody antidepressants I can medicate myself with Pinot at £4 a bottle” she
retorted
“Well if you change
your mind” he snapped as he got up “make an appointment to come to the surgery”
“If I could make it to
the bloody surgery I wouldn’t need your help, you pompous idiot” She shouted
after him
John remained seated
in the armchair and smiled as she slammed the door behind him, and that was the
moment he stopped seeing her as a damsel in distress.
He liked Faye despite
her phobia, she was a really feisty little redhead and quite cute to boot.
So having sought
medical advice and found them sadly wanting they resorted to Faye’s cure all
and read up on the subject on the internet again.
But even that was
contradictory at best and was by and large unhelpful but despite this they took
matters in their own hands, and formulated a plan based loosely on what they
had read.
On day one, Faye just
had to take one step out of her front door, count to 10 and step back again.
Although it didn’t
happen on day one it actually took 3 days for her to take that first important
step, which was a major breakthrough, and following that initial success she
repeated the process for a week, and then for the following five days she did
the same thing but counted five seconds longer each time before she stepped
back inside.
So after ten days of
taking a single step outside the front door, John moved her on to Phase two,
which involved Faye having to walk out of her front door and take two steps and
then touch the wall in front of her.
As she stood on the
threshold she was very apprehensive, but when she summoned up the courage to
move she achieved her goal at her very first attempt which she was so thrilled
and excited about that when she stepped back through the front door she kissed him.
But it wasn’t just an
excited peck on the cheek on the spur of the moment, it was full on the mouth,
and was followed through with no holds barred passion, and one thing led to
another and they ended up in her bed.
“Wow” John said as she
collapsed on top of him.
“Oh yes that was very
acceptable” she echoed and then as she cuddled up to him she added “I haven’t
done that for a while”
As John and Faye lay
entwined in each other’s arms in the afterglow of making love he was thinking
about the events that had lead them to her bed.
It hadn’t occurred to
John at any stage since he’d known her, even after she told him that she hadn’t
left the flat for three years, that Faye Harry hadn’t had sex.
Well it had actually
been 4 years since the last time she had made love and as a result she was as
horny as hell.
“Couldn’t you order
that on the internet?” he asked her jokingly after she revealed the truth about
her frustration.
“Oh I’m sure you can”
Faye replied tartly “but I don’t do it with just anyone you know”
John took her tart
reply to mean that he wasn’t just anyone which made him smile, which was great
because she wasn’t just anyone to him either.
As wonderful as it
was, there was an inadvertent consequence of sleeping with her, and not just
that first time but all the subsequent occasions as well, because he had
unintentionally given her another reason not to go outside.
Although to her great
credit she persevered, and although she enjoyed the love making she showed no
sign of giving up, in fact the more progress she made the more vigorously she
rewarded herself in the bedroom.
The steady progress
and the love making that accompanied it went on for three months and by October
she could walk to the lift without even pausing for breath, and by the end of
the month she had made so much progress she could walk to the lift and take the
lift all the way to the ground floor and even walk to the glass front doors in
the lobby.
But that was where she
faltered, day after day, she would pass through her front door with real
purpose only for it to evaporate away at the threshold of the outside world and
nothing he could say or do could make her go a step further.
Faye would cry on his
shoulder all the way back up in the lift and once back in her flat a black
depression would set in and so he had no option but to leave her.
It broke his heart to
see her like that but he knew that trying to lift her spirits when she was that
down was quite futile.
The next day however
she would be a different person and would be bright, and full of new resolve
which he knew would be short lived and there would soon be tears and depression
again.
Seeing her in tears
and depressed was all the more heart-breaking for John because he had fallen in
love with her.
However he was in
something of a quandary because he couldn’t tell her that he loved her, but not
because he didn’t think she felt the same about him, but because Faye’s ex
fiancé had once pledged his love to her in order to get her to re-enter the
world and he turned out to have feet of clay.
It was a gloriously
sunny early December day when it all came to a head.
“Today’s the day” she
said as they left her flat, hand in hand, dressed for Sharpington in winter and
he squeezed her hand in response and said
“I’m with you every
step of the way sweetheart”
She smiled and they
progressed briskly towards the lift without a moment’s hesitation.
The ride down to the
foyer was made in silence but for the rattling of the cables and Faye’s
breathing, which was slow and deliberate.
When the doors opened
on the ground floor the foyer was full of winter sunshine and they stepped
forward, still holding hands, and quickly crossed the foyer to the door to the
outside world.
As they approached the
double glass doors he reached his free hand out and pushed the left hand door
open and without breaking stride he stepped outside and still holding Faye’s
hand he pulled her behind him.
Once he emerged into
the fresh air he was thinking to himself
“So far, so good” when
his progress was halted.
He looked around to
see Faye half in and half out of the door hanging onto the door frame with her
free hand.
“You’re nearly there
darling” he said
“I can’t” she said
“Just one more step”
he urged her
“I can’t do it” she
repeated and let go of his hand
“Please come with me”
he pleaded
“Why?” she asked
“Well there are so
many places I want to take you, things I want to show you and things I want to
share with you” he said
“But why?” Faye said
remaining in the doorway
“Don’t you know why?”
he asked her
“No” she said
He didn’t want to say
it but she was giving him no alternative so he said
“Because I…..”
“No don’t say it John”
she shouted
“I have too”
“No you mustn’t” Faye
urged
“I must” he said
“You know I was
tricked back into the world once before by a false love” Faye said “I’m scared
it will happen all over again”
“I can’t not say it,
because it’s true” he said “I love you”
“I love you too” she
responded almost in tears “but I still don’t think I can do it”
“Then don’t” John said
“What?” she said
“I don’t care where we
are as long as we’re together” he said
“You don’t ever have
to come outside you can stay in there forever and I will bring the world to
you”
“And you will still
love me?” she asked
“Forever” he replied
“Hold my hand” she
said and he reached out and took hold of her outstretched hand, and she grasped
it tightly like her life depended on it.
John looked at her
determined face and smiled at her and she returned it with interest.
“Ok I’m ready” she
said and taking a deep breath she stepped over the threshold out into the
sunshine and into his arms.
As they stood there
outside Jubilee Court in the December sunshine she was laughing and then she
said
“I did it”
“Yes you did”
“I love you John”
“I love you too”
“So where are you
going to take me?” she asked looking up at him and smiling.
“How about a walk
along the prom to begin with” he said and kissed her
“Well you really know
how to show a girl a good time” she said putting her arm through his
“Hold that thought for
when we get back to the flat and we need warming up”
“Oh goodie, let’s go
and get chilly then” she said and squeezed his arm.
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