Friday, 20 May 2022

Tales from the Finchbottom Vale – (76) Miss Kirby and the Stranger

 

Virginia Kirby was a ward sister at the Winston Churchill Hospital and she was a rather plain middle-aged woman just the wrong side of 50.

Virginia was five foot six inches tall and very trim, and stood an inch or so taller in her stout shoes, and her sisters uniform fitted her perfectly, tapered at the waist where the broad belt sat.

Her once black hair was now streaked with grey and bore what Catherine Cookson fans would recognise as the “Mallen streak”.

She was always smiling, but the ageing in her face wasn’t all due to laughter lines, life’s hardships and experiences were etched into her face as well, each line and furrow an event and for those who could read such signs it was like her résumé.

She was well-liked and respected at work but none of her colleagues knew her outside of work and assumed she was just a sad lonely spinster.

That was due in part to the fact that she was a private person and didn’t talk of her private life and also because those who had happened to see her outside of work reported back that she was a frump as she choose to dress in the twin set and tweed style because sartorially Virginia was a sensible shoes and utilitarian tights kind of woman.

Even people from the village of Dulcet St Mary, where she had lived for 20 years believed her to be a sad lonely old soul and many of them referred to her as “the prudish Miss Kirby” or “virginal Virginia” or “the dried up old spinster”.

 

But as more than one man had found out over the years to their surprise beneath the frumpy exterior lay a hidden warmth.

The other thing that tended to reinforce the stereotype was her heavy involvement with St Mary’s church but even the other congregants were unaware of her true nature.

Which was why when a new curate arrived at St Mary’s and was in need of lodgings Virginal Virginia was as always the obvious choice.

Being single and living in a four bedroom house she always had room for a lodger and being the epitome of respectability and a dried up old virgin to boot there was never a hint of impropriety.

 

So that was how it came about that the new curate, 34 year old Colin Ash, came to be knocking on Virginia’s front door one cold winters evening and he found the Hospitality in the Kirby household to be much warmer than he was expecting when he fell in love with Virginia’s niece Molly.

Which was why, when a blizzard closed the local roads and 50 year old Sharpington resident Tony Malley couldn’t get home, and was stranded in Dulcet St Mary with nowhere to stay for the night, Colin Ash knew the solution to his vagrancy.

Colin knew that his landlady had the cure for his predicament as he had been on the receiving end himself.

“Come with me” he said “Miss Kirby will fix you up”

“Are you sure?” Tony asked

“Very sure” he replied

 

Colin Ash and Tony Malley trudged their way together from the church to Virginia’s house through the falling snow.

“Here we are” Colin said as he unlocked the door

“I just need to change, if you wait in the lounge I’ll join you shortly”   

“Ok” he concurred and he opened the door to the lounge as Colin climbed the stairs smiling broadly as it gave him the opportunity for a quick 5 minutes with his fiancé.

 

When he entered the room he found a skinny middle aged woman with a pretty face, blue eyes, soft shoulder length brown hair, wearing a black cocktail dress, thick black tights and heels.

“Miss Kirby?” he said

“Yes” she replied with a smile

“Oh” he exclaimed

“Oh I see, I’m Not the “Virginal Virginia” you were expecting” she said

“No”

“Are you disappointed?” she asked

“Not at all” he replied

“Well I don’t normally look like this” she said and he raised an eyebrow

“I’ve been to a drinks party” she explained

“Well you look very nice” Tony said

“Thank you” she said and kicked off her shoes and sat on the sofa with her legs up.

“I’m Tony Malley by the way”

“Virginia” she responded and shook his hand “I take it you are looking for a room”

“Yes Colin said you might be able to help” He explained “You are apparently a local treasure”

“Well yes I do have a room” Virginia said “But I am unable to offer you an evening meal”

“That’s not a problem” he said “I could get us a chip supper”

“Oh that would be lovely” she said and smiled

 

Colin was just coming down the stairs as Tony left the lounge and he said

“Everything ok?”

“Yes, I’m just off to find the chip shop” Tony replied turning up his collar

“Excellent I’ll keep you company and show you the way” Colin said amiably

 

As he returned to the house with 3 fish suppers, he reflected on his good fortune at being a guest of Miss Kirby who he supposed, from what he had heard to be an old maid, who’d been left on the shelf, and was a dried up old spinster, but had turned out to be a different prospect all together.

 

He very much enjoyed his enforced stay at Miss Kirby’s while the heavy snow fall kept him in Dulcet St Mary for two days, but her amiable company kept him there for a further two days after the roads had reopened.

And in the months that followed he became a frequent visitor to Virginia Kirby’s house because they had fallen in love.

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